dril.txt

Bacon nutella fortnite selfystick iPhone avocado kanye Mocha Latte (deep breath) triggered tinder starbucks Chipotle safe space pumpkinspice SEP "this is going to sound so cool" i rev the engine and it explodes, leaving me rolling around on the road with a smouldering dick & ass crack SEP i am not quite ready to declare this coming summer as "The Summer of Gaming" but keep up with my feed and i will let you know when i do it SEP if the sting ray that killed steve irwin tried to kill me i would bust its ass and crumple it up like a newspaper SEP before you go around muting my posts and blocking this or that , its important to consider the Shit that i bring to the table SEP i love shit that isnt "For" me SEP feeding my pigs a big bag of barber hair SEP i want to beat the shit out of a ufo SEP swinging my great grandfather\'s nine iron around on my motorcycle and saying "Seniors Rule" every time i hit something SEP the anti flintstones agenda. by saying bull shit like "Yabba dabba dont" the pro-Jetsons Associated Press is flagrantly exposing their Ass. SEP WATCH: Low IQ single Father fooled into thinking he has been accepted to Yale at the age of 44. Savor his pain SEP wiki/Coprophagia/media/File:Adonis_Blue_butterflies.jpg\n\n SEP (contorting entire face into an abominable purple frown) cobb salad?? that sounds fuckin STUPID SEP i requested 1 jeans, of 100% Legacy Deluxe Denim Menswear. what you\'ve brought me is Classic Men\'s Denim Premium Wear, which, clearly sucks, SEP you don\'t need to tell me im beautiful because boys are out here doing it for them self this year SEP show the thread coward SEP you are a known troll and reply guy SEP saying something like "i only bought that nirvana album b/c it has a babys dick on it" and alternating between backpedaling & doubling down SEP i do support the long display names so people can change them to things like "The Discourse Is a Hell Of A Drug!!" instead of an actua lname SEP changing my display name to "Richerd Simmons" as an april fools prank and inducing dissociative Psychosis on millions of on-line people SEP as a guy who developed an autoimmune response to comedy as a result of being "Roasted" for my Ice man tattoo, ive much to say of April FOols SEP (seeing the RE/MAX balloon at a hockey game) shit, they got RE/MAX here? Not bad, SEP yeah they need help getting right in the toilet . SEP im not verified yet but i hope to be once deals with his many personal demons . SEP Introvert = In vitro pervert. theyre sick SEP aid\'s SEP the reason i dont address the trolls ib because i know that the truth would hurt them so much that they would probably take their own lives. SEP Reviewing your application for my exclusive group dm with girls in it... Hmm whats this? In 2016 you said my posts are "Family guy" ? Denied SEP its a coin SEP i will never use the word "Doubloon" to describe a coin SEP i have just gotten word that the 3d dog in Untitled 3D Dog Project (2021) can speak english, like a man SEP Out Here Ginding SEP i think i believe in those SEP when firiing a weapon i dont believe in recoil SEP pringles caliphate SEP star wars is back SEP the wga guild kicked the shit out of me and rooted through my bag and stole my screen play "husband baby" aobut a woman who marries a baby SEP Once again i have been blocked for starting the dialouge . SEP "Feel as though ive evolved beyond the need for Product, and now crave the Customer Experience"\nHubert Joly: Boy have I got the shit for you SEP it fucking Sucks when a store sells me shit\n SEP No you dont SEP you look like the tomb raider lady Lol\nMar 22\n\njust heard the news of jussie smollett. Feeling unsafe right now\n5s\n\nYou can no longer send m SEP sorry for roasting your set up SEP saying "WOW" out loud watching youtube guy\'s username spin around in 3d in the 20 second intro to his video, going Psycho watching this shit SEP there`s no job harder than that of the Media Personality. there are so many massive pedophiles who you have to not accidentally say are good SEP oh forgive me for forgetting that youre too good to visit my squalid LA apartment to watch all 9 seasons of the abc sitcom "coach" as a joke SEP when the earths Magnetic Poles flip and everyone suddenly stops thinking script format posts are good <<< (whichever directions the bad one) SEP ME: I love shit that is Dunning-Kruger\nNY Times: What?\nWaPo: Explain your self\njeffrey Epstein: Damn lol , Nicely trolled SEP full time Cash Back award activator SEP buiyng a massive 30lb bottle of pills labelled "PussyAdvantage" for a girl on here who told me im like a more Honest version of Dane Cook... SEP just found out about Object Permanence... why didnt any one tell me about this shit SEP mastering Life calmness in the face of being called a dip shit SEP giving myself micro penis as punishment for my worsening posture SEP shame on you for giving these men a platform .... SEP my ass isnt very good, over all. my ass and the hole of my ass are boring to think about SEP - the Deterioration of my Balls - SEP the gaming challenge: load up your video game of choice and play it until you reach the credits sequence. the gaming challenge SEP pleased to eannounce that all my posts will now be about the Filipino israeli defense force, which i have recently been fooled into joining SEP starting to think maybe that it kicked ass when that guy siad "show me the money" in that movie i never watched SEP spending my honey moon in the bathroom, watching video of chef gorddon ramsey saying "Ah Fuck Me" after being served a shitty looking onion SEP started smoking at the advice of the "Making friends in your 50\'s" reddit post, quit after reading the "How to make your cum taste good" one SEP yes i am a "HO"\n\nHonorable\nonline SEP waiter i would like to pay my bill , "En Pièces" (In coins) SEP if harvard offered to increase my IQ by one point per dollar i would simply say no. And that\'s the most important takeaway from all this SEP today; we are all Yale SEP i do not trust this graph as it has clearly been doctored to look like a penis SEP two handfuls of kitty litter taken from the beautiful hollywood home of sports broadcaster Dick Vitale , for $100 or best offer SEP withholding this week\'s Epic Games tithe until they address the issue of people on the mic calling me "Somebody Uncle" SEP today is international lunch day so start eating. #InternationalLunchDay SEP its middle finger SEP reevaluate This. ,,/,, SEP they will kick my ass for saying it. they will take my career and my livelihood away from me. but "Wine" , is better than, "The News" SEP oh youre a paramedic? i write a bunch of sutupid fucking shit on the internet about my ass hole and penis. Its cool though. Its fun SEP feel as though i could break through most walls with my bare hands , given an unlimited amount of time and resources SEP Funny how some people will forget to click the like button on my posts but always remember to like posts that say war crimes are good , etc SEP ive enlisted the aid of Simon & Schuster to publish my thoughts of Jussie Smollett in an early 2021 release entitled "Thoughts of Jussie" . SEP O\n---||---\n |\n 8==D ~~-,.\n / \\ ` Poseurs\n / \\ SEP attempting to hand hundred dollar bills to the ailing sheldon adelson like duce nukem SEP the rumors are true, my posts are all written in GMT Time; "Giving My Thoughts" . SEP Fidgett spinners are making people dumb assed . SEP This is the reason i post . SEP im taking back thw word "Penis" because boys are being out here doing it for them self SEP consider that the possibility remains, that most of you have not yet hit the skill ceiling of wiping your ass SEP #foundMedia #ReallyGood SEP elvis never fucked any of his fans . thats why he was "The king" SEP Very Nice SEP fuck tumblr SEP might fuck around and post "The Masked Shitter" , as a sort of commentary on a certain tv show with a similar name SEP Its 2019 and It `s only 12 pm SEP jacking off is " Ghetto " SEP when i see shit on the news saying we lost 50000 jobs for w/e reason, i say damn... i couldve scored some of those jobs, if they werent Lost SEP everyone needs something worth dying for..mine just happens to be the japanese racist version of the wazzup ad SEP i was going to do it but I got scared SEP now from my understanding, the bra store is not only a place to get bras, but also functions as a sort of social hub, for single woman & men SEP entering Crisis Mode after doing one of the bath salt jokes from 2013 & getting clapped backed by a girl saying bath salts are good actually SEP human sack of dog shit; holding up the self service aisle, trying to beat the system by taping balloons to the produce scale SEP this aint the damn barney channel SEP you tube has very specifically been recommending me videos of apes getting electrocuted so clearly the data indicates im some sort of mutant SEP if you dont down load the latest versions of all your programs youre fucking stupid SEP About what . SEP the Clitoral pussy SEP i like to act genuinely baffled when people tell me to shut the fuck up. like "Huh? But why? The shit i post here helps people, but ok," SEP if i had a million bucks i would b uy a Pregnant sears mannequin SEP howd would youd like a taste of my butt cheek , Punk SEP lord knows i help my self from time to time... SEP A man took sips out of his neighbor` s hummingbird feeder for over 2 years. This is what happened to his Kidneys SEP "The Godfather: Part Iraq" (2004) In this 4th installment of the Godfather series, the godfathers head to iraq to settle the score, of 9/11. SEP i would say Mr President, the partisan gridlock ends now. i would then roll up like a pill bug and pray for the darkness to come quickly SEP if the united states president deemed me a threat to our nation, absoluitely i would let him zap me in the skull. i would hand him the gun, SEP Shut the fuck up . Christ SEP And its onl y 1:pm. Thread SEP chose your fighter SEP ME: id like to use my AAdvantage rewardsPoints,\nAmerican Airlines: Im ready to pull the trigger. Go on. Drive the knife deeper into my heart SEP rocky homer simpson show SEP Mhickey Mouse Cartoon Hands Flipping The Bird Marijuana Weed for Iphone and Samsung Galaxy Case (iPhone 6 plus white) SEP "they shoul;d replace the cameras on cellphones with Bibles. because the Bible is like a camera into your soul" - michio kaku SEP open letter, to the man who told me that they should make an app for "Shutting the fuck up" during my town hall web development conference ; SEP It Is said, that the online content creator absorbs the combined pain of every follower 24 hrs a day—and that is why they cry in saddness... SEP flashing the coupon that allows me to shit in the kfc employee restroom, like a police badge, as i vault my big ass over the counter SEP wildly agreeing with some shit im reading in the newspaper that says like "There is nothing more Iconic, than Milk and Cereal" SEP ihate it when a doddering Nanny yanks me by the ear lobe, right when im about to click "Like" on a big plate of sausages SEP you say "36,000 pounds of chicken nuggets recalled by the Tyson Foods corporation due to possible rubber contamination" ... i say "LUNCH\' SEP laughing all the way to the bank, but only because the guy walking in front of me is wearing a twisted t-shirt............ SEP What is it that you first seek when inspecting a profile which presents a potential networking opportunity SEP Are you accusing me of being "Gaga" for waif0000 ?? SEP No thats too far . SEP captured by a medieval castle town in the year 1598, hung up on the cross and having long florescent light bulbs broken against my dick SEP it\'s balls to ass like the sheriff say SEP making my face Symmetrical in microsoft paint after haivng a mental breakdown on linkedin. com SEP Its time to open the dialouge, on the Mens penis. SEP using my turn at a karaoke bar to try to do a 5 miunte routine that basically just says bryan singer is the new gawker writer or something SEP it takes so many muscles to kick my ass. like a million SEP it takes fewer muscles to smile than it does to break a baseball bat across the back of my fat neck SEP there is too much of Lies... SEP Genius: the Human body can survive being shot 100 times\nFool: ?\nGenius: (Shoots self in th exact same spot 100 times) remember to click Like SEP none f you know anything about art or life. i have read the entire dictionary more than 100 times SEP some one on here said they were going to "Cuck" teddy ruxpin, while the mods are off sipping mimosas somewhere SEP shitting on a Towel SEP I regret not doing this sooner. SEP im not going to post about taking shits or shitting anymore . i Condemn all of my previous posts about shitting and asses SEP every one with the word "meme" in their bio has put at least one hole in their bedroom wall with the butt of a rifle SEP resisting extreme amounts of arrest SEP ill show you real truth. ill show you what happens when you crap on a real son of a bitch SEP pulled over for dragging a clothing donation bin behind my truck; asking cop to make people stop honking at me because "its loud" "it sucks" SEP all cops should be forced to dress like james bond, as a promotional thing. I think it would be fun to get pulled over by 007 James bond SEP Im fucking the wall. a tectonic shift 900 miles away causes it to slice off my thin prick and drop it on mexican soil. Its their problem now SEP please remove the pervert alert SEP And I am being told now, that because Incest is now Official White House policy, that this post could be construed as a "Politics tweet" SEP just got word from a trusted source: the guy who said he would fuck his daughter on "The View" is in hot water for spelling hamburger wrong SEP me,; attempting to heckle a stand up comedian: Hey pal I dont come to where you work and knock the dick out of oyur mouth!! Mother fucker SEP shooting my lee dungarees with an uzi for that "armyman" look SEP i miss 100% of the shots i dont take mother fucker SEP user "rat_thrower" has received a 500 minute ban for proposing a 28th constitutional amendment SEP im not a ignorant fuckfaced dip shit. i enjoy every minute of it SEP shut thr fuck up SEP should go without saying but, if they show j. bezos penis on the news i will postpone the showing of my penis, to avoid confusing followers. SEP being desperate enough for human connection to go onto girls posts & chide them for using Twitter Web Client or whatever other one they used SEP I am not a baby . I am a Human SEP i will show my penis because i do not want to host the Oscars, as you see, i will be busy that night, watching the Oscars. SEP on February 19th, 2019, i will show my penis on here and effectively remove myself from consideration as the host of this years Oscar show. SEP while youre here id like to report this pervert for impersonating a cowboy SEP might do a post of "macklemore" soon. SEP craping out a single sunflower seed and frowning while i inspect it SEP EVERY ONE: Divorce jokes are SO funny, and I love to spout my mouth to disresepect and jeff\nME: No no no. Im uncomfortable. No SEP just heard on the news that our enemies all follow the cutesy motivational shit accounts also, and draw even more power from them than we do SEP getting brain damage from pissing my self off SEP #LawEnforcementAppreciationDay showing apperciation today by wearing the badge and uniform i bought from off of ebay thank you Sir SEP posting Ethically, within reason SEP how do i ask my girl followers on here to marry me with out looking like im "Stunting " or trying to "Pimp" SEP "fear not loyal fans. james bond blasts all his turds/piss to smithereens with a laser while on missions." -james bond, author of james bond SEP gathering data of Nude Locals SEP Seems as though lately, peop[le have been talking their mouths of things SEP Im being reply guyed SEP some times you just gotta say "nuff said" because enough of the shit has been said to that point SEP (hearing the first recorded sound from 1860, a pivotal technological milestone) This guy sounds like shit. Mostly his voice sounds like shit SEP ive modified my phone to deliver electric shocks each time one of you unfollows me. The pain will make me kinder, humbler, and more powerful SEP No SEP i will do better next year sir SEP scoring 15% on the buzz feed quiz "Medical Term or Slur" SEP weaving a "Feel Good" tale about how dogs hate fireworks because theyre reincarnate US armymen with ptsd; getting down voted for some reason SEP calm the FUCK down SEP From the twisted minds behind Dr. Pepper, SEP im not wishning you freaks a happy new year. you will all fuck up my 2019, like you have with all the other years. youre dopes SEP thinking about how good the Hanging Gardens of Babylon would be, if it wasnt ruined by its obnoxious fanbase SEP guy who once posted "Service dogs love having their ears grabbed" given permanent seat in wolf blitzers situation room #Redemption SEP just once id like to see an archaeologist speak truth on one of the mummys he found. "He looks like someone knocked the shit out of him" SEP baptizing my badge and gun, in Sinnersblood SEP taking a deep breath and inhaling all that horrible, pornographic Wi-fi SEP (rodent voice) its damn Friday night!!! And Ill be dipped in shit if I aint ready to throw down some pecker SEP I Want all of that shit SEP i put an alert on that shit like 10 years ago. thank you SEP Can you make them all un block me please . SEP what blocklists SEP linking my Folders to other Folders or whatever the fuck it is people do on the computer SEP ME: No matter how ya slice it, Sometimes some shit is just true\n???: Shit is never true. Its all false\nME: Youre wrong my friend SEP "Hwhoo!! That\'s a lot of zeroes" - me after seeing the amount of money of $12.00 SEP "breaking in" my new pair of jeans by tossing it onto the freeway and letting cars run over it while i observe it through a scope SEP brushing teeth; mouth gaping open like a shit head as toothpaste drips down my wrist, waking up next morning in a panic, thinking it\'s cum SEP buying an assortment of soaps and ointments to make my ass hole less stupid SEP JACKING OFF and committing FRAUD SEP ive always said we need to make the Dou Jones go up, instead of down. And now that ive been proven right, every one wants to kiss my dick . SEP considering improving the quality of my posts somewhat, so i can get the MacArthur Genius Award, for them SEP great tweetie bird quote SEP trying to drink a can of beer . SEP operating an unregulated labor camp on the Dean\'s lawn a nd saying "Shut the fuck up sir" when he comes out of his house to threaten us SEP the dean loves it when me and the boys piss him off with black helicopters SEP excitedly approaching people, with a rehearsed smile, like a fucked up rodent, and asking them what they think of the latest Bixby update SEP buying a nice curtain for the whole ass and dick area of my bulk SEP seeing more and more people post anti-lunch sentiments despite the fact that, well, they gotta eat . SEP my book is now 35% off again for some reason. $11.68 - cheaper than dog shit "Nice for the holidays" SEP I;ve looked at the facts. Hell im looking at the facts right now. SEP his mission was to destroy it . SEP judges should sentence perverts to more stupid shit, like making them do obstacle courses made out of porno. bet it\'s not so good now huh SEP youtube guy does magic tricks for an ape, and someone in the comments says magic is actually harmful to apes. well, fuck this shit, then !! SEP geting AssBlasted for sharing my normal man\'s perspective, in a world . being fucked hardcore, by goblins, for liking Due Process SEP using intense calmness , As the dragon , while dealing with peoples shitmouth SEP rats dont have pussys SEP fairly confident that even if i became a rat some how, i still would not want to fuck any of the other rats SEP ME: computer; what is my Jeans Number please\nCOMPUTER: your jeans number is 5. the ultimate compromise of durability & comfort\nME: (Smiling) SEP envisioning Jeans Hotspots across america & various territories, where consumers can learn their "Jeans number" and look at photos of jeans SEP listeing to the updated version of the "baby its cold outside" song where the guy\'s trying to convince the woman to leave so he can jack off SEP just got word that because the extensive water damage present o n my balls and part of my ass, i am no longer allowed to vote SEP rscreaming "Shut the Fuck Up" over and over again at my monitor as it slowly morphs into a Mirror and only makes me angrier SEP none of my followers masturbate. SEP girls love saying shit like "Ebay is my father", while i sit in my house 50 miles away solivng a book of 200 expert level crossword puzzles. SEP thinking back to 9/11.. i wish i had flipped out more. Wondering how different things wou;d be if i had gone more ape shit SEP im proud to announce that ive started and cancelled The Female Bras Project due to Free Speech and Trolls, respectively SEP eaitng a raw piece of corn in my car and spitting like 95% of it right back out SEP surround alcatraz with Poison 2020 SEP Imbecile SEP if youre one of thoe waiters who carries the little scraper around , to the tables, to get the crumbs off it `` Kiss Da Back O\' My Nuts `` SEP i like to believe that getting my ass kicked 100 times a day for 50 years has granted me "Street Smarts" SEP taking my 3d printed wife to the Arboretum . SEP give me the 200000 SEP need a dog who can maneuver something in the ball park of 600000 blocks of limestone around my yard SEP wondering at what age my domesticated rat terrier is supposed to "Graduate" and move out of my house SEP santa #goodbook #Remembering41 #BushFuneral SEP i will block those who shit on the Bones of Mr. GHWB, euthanized with a lethal dose of Heroin after 94 years of service "As was his request" SEP hunched over my Bureau Plat with quill & ink , writing a thank you letter to the Kohler toilet company for letting me shit in their toilets SEP arms folded, back turned to the television, refusing to "Meet the flintstones" despite the theme song\'s pleas SEP a man asks God, how am i supposed to live, without George H.W. Bush\nGod simply said "That is why I made 2 george bushs"\nThe man just smiled. SEP now the 5s on the other hand. the ironclad Top influencers. you know these guys wouldnt be caught dead with an ass thats less than pristine SEP some pf you are definitely a 1. i truly believe the carelessness you exhibit with your sloppy posts is reflected also by your dire ass hole. SEP my 5 point numerical scale determines how likely a user is to be negligent in wiping their ass properly, based on the stuff they post here SEP Mr. Spendmoney Tomakemoney SEP i hate it when im jacking off, and... And, uh,. thats it. thats the tweet SEP reality check....its not "Funny" or "Good" to fool Content Creators into showing their penis to the official red lobster account— Perieod. SEP i would like to become somebodys Uncle so i can start posting shit like "not all dips are marinades , but all marinades, are dips" SEP the words "yugioh angel" reverse burned into my flesh after attempting to pose shirtless on the hood of my modified car during a heat wave SEP #RockCenterXMAS a holiday Salute, to all the guys who died while putting bulbs in that big ass tree, whose bodies just got left up there SEP cant get ahold of my brexit adviser SEP can feel such a shit load of energies tonight, that i may see them, and that i may be here for them, on the computer tonight SEP take my penis out? in a "PUBLIC BATHROOM" (the key word, being public)\nno thanks. im not jared from sub way SEP ive decided that it would be good, to have 2 million followers. now what do you say we get the damn ball rolling on that SEP sending people who tell me not to eat romaine lettuce a link to the wikipedia article for The Streisand Effect SEP keep it coming. I love this shit SEP a tendency to substitute the word "Shit" with "Dust" when talking to girls (e.g. "just wiped a bunch of Dust out of my ass today") SEP "Watch the new Barney?"\nthat the worst thing any one has ever said to me and you need to S.T.F.U. before i bring the hammer down to your ass SEP did you know, every time you flush the toilet without closing the lid, millions of waste particles fly directly into my open mouth & kill me SEP a tisket? Fine\na tasket? Fuck yes\na green and yellow basket? Too much SEP all the youth thhese days look like dead eyed little perverts because they are not incorporating Geritol into their daily routine SEP my teething ring. my salt lick. my feeding tube. all at once SEP putting on my game face. the official face of the nfl SEP there should be a good version of the oscars where they hand out statues that are fucking wearing clothes SEP mixing various wine\'s together and making authentic "Al dente" pasta by straining it one minute early, as instructed by the box SEP man throwing chairs compilation 2018- uploaded by the games codger SEP my turds are nobodys problem but my own. and theyre boring SEP i am protected from your bull shit SEP first they say we cant build mosques on ground zero. now we cant build the amazon headquarters. maybe we should go live in the fucking Woods SEP just thought of a good name for a fictional football team located in a town that i also made up the name of , "The Boatswainville Birdhawks" SEP mother fucker . catch these boots SEP 63 updates available? youre telling me thyere making my apps even better, for FREE? And to think these guys, get so much greif SEP in a world where big data threatens to commodify our lives,. telling online surveys that i "Dont know" what pringles are constitutes Heroism SEP holy gravy holy meat\n holy moly let us eat SEP lesbian Wireless SEP down load the brexit app today muy lord SEP crawling on all fours like the cave men\n- enhanced mobility\n-powerful stance (can not be knocked over)\n- pretty good SEP remembering the anguiush the girls had caused me when they said it was good to have "Dadbod" SEP looking at pictures of rotisserie chickens i wish i could maul with my bare hands SEP every day, the content creator sits at his Oak Escritoire and asks "How can I transfer the maximum amount of pain to my parasitic Engagers" SEP i can promise only this; i will lick the boots of my enemies until they beg for mercy , crying SEP quick reminder to vote for the guy you want to lose tomorrow, just to get as pissed off as possible and enhance your Craft through suffering SEP it is indeed possible to shit too much. i would advise my followers to try to shit in multiple, smaller intervals , throughout the day. SEP uber ride home from dennys iwth the instagram Gf (mid-20s, dressed like a casino waitress) shrieking at each other because i "Made a face" SEP q: what is a "What da fuck" moment\nA: a "What da fuck" moment is one of those times that just simply makes you say what the fuck SEP attaching an enmormous dildo to my rifle so i can grip it in my mouth for added stability. thats how it is #army #navy #themafia SEP covering "sarcasm just another service i offer" tshirt with a shirt that says im not that interested in sarcasm to catch my rivals off guard SEP pledging to cut down on "oafish" behavior, such as accidentally eating spicy food or having my shirt ripped off by a windmill SEP world record 100 diaper combo run over by jeep SEP excuse me. could i please get my Blowup. you gave MetalGearEric a blowup. am i truly less deserving, than MetalGearEric? where is my blow up SEP #selfiesforariana SEP how do i get one of those stupid ass hyper links under my display name that says im a senator SEP i do not say this lightly, i would do what ever means necessary to protect my beloved posters from the devilish hands of otto Warmbier SEP when you call me a shit head, or a dip shit, or a low rent stooge, that is like putting a knife directly into my Posts. SEP (11yr old Jack Droseys head pulled out of toilet)it bears repeating that \'Likes\' are not conducive to my vision, and th(gets dunked again) SEP clumsily wiping my ass in the woods SEP if i wanted to die painfully i would live in that shitty aquarium with your fish SEP really good place to leave a new toilet SEP shut thef FUCK UP SEP my Dust SEP i will never thank you SEP its funny and it Rocks SEP Thats right. I did the blocks. Im absolutely ripping ass up tonight and I dont give a fuck who knows it. This is the power of my holy light SEP nothing give s me more power in this life than blocking a guy who asks me nicely in the dms to unblock him or one of his rat friends SEP its monday now, but ive decided that yesterday was the first official "Shut Da Fuck Up Sunday" which means its time to block 5 dick heads SEP if you come to this website for jokes, rather than Experiences, youre Fucking yourself SEP i saod it once i say it again—the pain of being a content creative influencer, and dealing with peoples shit, is like child birth on "Crack" SEP i think that if mensa started getting involved in gang violence, they would easily Win SEP they should invent a new Danimal , mayvbe one that people might actually fucking want to associate with yogurt products for once SEP reminder to guys trying to offer me Merch Deals, that i tried selling shirts once but it failed because none of my followers wear shirts SEP if my bank balance is below $100 i will refuse to vote. if it is over $100 i will vote for whichever candidate has the best "Ground game" SEP wondering how i learned all the different informal synonyms for "penis" outside of health class. I think they announced them on the news SEP #WorldFoodDay food sucks. food sucks SEP It is simply for your foolish claim that the economys doing poorly, right after they increased the Mega Millions Jackpot, that I am Smiling. SEP this is every thing and its only 11:am, SEP there seems to be a Fucking mistake here sir, SEP thinking of some new provocative poses and gestures i can use at the local drive in movie theater to get my ass kicked more efficiently SEP paid by sinclair broadcast group to read paragraphs of unbearable QAnon Shit to a roblox server full of 7yr olds attacking me for my beliefs SEP absolutely ruining my own day by imagining a restaurant that refuses to serve me because im wearing brass knuckles SEP coke zero but for pringles. pringles zero SEP getting my Dick finagled , by my tantric wifebride, in my chamber\'s SEP my expert analysis wouuld indicate that each point on the dow jones = 1 job(s) SEP COP: weve detected unusual amounts of cum being flushed down the toilet at your house. please stop\nME: Thats not mine. Its uh,. my dogs cum SEP i hold this one truth, that the only acceptable time to use the word "Doo-Dah" is while singing the hit cult-classic "Camptown Races" SEP i hold this one truth, that thr only acceptable time to use the word "Doo-Dah" is while singing the cult-classic hit "Yankee Doodle" SEP good avatar round up October 2018 SEP deleted the tweet where i said that homer simpson is allowed to show his penis in the japanese version and im allowed to work at kmart again SEP Fool SEP - its not clever to show pictures of me morphing into a dog\n- its not funny\n- it odes not introduce Beauty into the world SEP Oh how i hate him SEP just thought of a new guy. "The Guy who writes down the make and model of a car he saw in a car commercial, for future reference" SEP he has not responded to my request to send him to boot camp SEP digimonotis: i do not trust or support him\nEpicWayne: i trust and support epic wayne\nmr_Tightnuts : i support him but i do not trust him SEP consider how unprepared society would be if every bug and moth flying around just started taking giant shits constantly, like human sized SEP yelp review one liner i have prepared in case i find a turd in my meal: "If i wanted a guy\'s Shit in my food, I would have ordered it!!" SEP feel i have much to reflect upon in my life, on news of receiving "The Golden Douchebag" award. Many improvements to make, moving forward. SEP COP: Tell me citizien. (prepares kill shot) Do you believe in God\nME (realizing i left my "Do you Believe in god" cheat sheet at home): Uuhh SEP my brain stacks 2 baby blocks together mentally and i involuntarily say something like "Trader Joes is basicly the Modern simpsons episodes" SEP do better SEP I Have been told that my followers have agreed that it would be good, if my name that people started calling me were to become "MR.JUICE" SEP boh of you SEP THE BOYS: Come! Come quickly! Theres a Seal balancing a ball on its nose, at the Gazebo\nME: Cant. Wife is making me buy 36 Forever Stamps SEP Realizing the food at KFC sucks ass for the 4th or 5th time in my life , and making myself calm by looking up famous quotes about "Chaos" SEP a respectful nod to all my friends whohave been removed from group chats after having some sort of melt down. "The Fallen Angels" SEP Cigar mommys SEP Im just going to say that this is for anyone who thinks its good SEP Theres a guy standing outside lennys pastrami shop. Says hes going to goon your ass SEP (Guy coming towards me with a weapon. at a walking pace) "Ill goon your ass hole. Ill goon your ass sir"\n"You will not goon my ass" SEP "ill goon your ass. ill pig you out"\nyeuah um, No, its highly unlikely that you will "Goon" my ass. Try reading a book of english SEP (using a hand mirror to get a real good look at my Fucking balls) whoah!! im seeing double! SEP the book is like 34% off now. only $11.81 . i have absolutely no idea why. nobody tells me shit SEP tipping the waiter is BORING, no one even DOEs it SEP when i block people its cool, like Neo kicking agent smith down a flight of staiors. when people block me its because theyre pussys SEP blockbotting the boys group after they put a towel over one of our friends heads and convinced me that its elon Musk, come to kick my ass SEP slapping all my repliers across the face in one swoop like moe howard. all of them dropping dead instantly SEP absolutely nuking my dick into 1000000 pieces with one of those wile e coyote tnt plungers SEP epic wayne once told me that there is a hard limit that the human body can handle jacking off in one day. and that the limit is 3 SEP working on a solution to t his, and also for people in austrailia who cant get it SEP my dumb ass book appears to be 10% off for god only knows what reason. check it out if you like coupons and bargains SEP my mentions are on lock down until further notice . SEP ??? Where SEP the only A+ i ever got was from that time in art class when i drew venus & serena willaims clobbering the. shit out of me with their rackets SEP at the library; carelessly flipping through some of the most famous literary classics that you can think of, looking for coupons SEP thinking about displaying an authentic harley davidson denim vest in a box frame to really tie my rec room together and make it suck ass SEP "hooters 2" is the most perfect phrase ive ever seen. "hooters 2" is just ok. "hooters 2" isnt that funny. "hooters 2" is good again. SEP "always have at least 2 drew Carey anecdotes" SEP getting my ass run over after trying to hijack a guy\'s riding mower and failing SEP think i might quit my job and invent the Original chicken sandwich SEP yeah that blows. anyway i was wondering where i can buy one of them please SEP reminder that on this sacred of days that i was the first guy to condemn the 911 attacks, while everyone else was busy watching honey Boboo SEP Wendy`s is so main stream now, that eating there has become a bit of a Wank . SEP boycott digimon otis. hes not even that funny SEP watching some bulllet time movies and inventing my own bechdel test for bullet time instead of girls SEP guys in a pizzeria fighting and busting the little parmesan shakers against the table to shiv each other with SEP using mindfulness. to waste my enemies SEP by refusing to accept my invitation to a formal debate. octomom has gone Rogue SEP wearing a false ass crack and prosthetic dick on top of my real ones in case my pants get burned off by fire SEP COWORKER: I Just took out a little baggie of DouDou, to eat at work, and Im getting a raise, for being handsome\nME: I Admire your Opinions . SEP i invented pain and I am so good at knowing what pain is and im biting my fingers really hard out of respect for pain SEP please lord publish my email just this once SEP Some body is going to take a picture of their white house press pass with a load on it, by 2020 SEP Not. All. Of. The. Wet. Spots. On. My. Jeans. Are. Piss. Stians. SEP Geans SEP thanks for showing me this robots dick SEP just reassuring you all, that if i forgot to include your favorite tweet in my book it is because it sucked Ass. Get fucked off of my page SEP just plowing trhough the 7-11 double doors with extra wide samurai armour and dropping broken glass all over my Geta (下駄) SEP me and the boys watching james bond morph into a black guy before our very eyes , and braying at the movie screen like distressed cattle SEP i think that big foot and mouth man have sons every 20 years or so and they make the son the next big foot or whatever SEP i am being targetted by a shadow campaign just because i cured my own diarhrea by exercising instead of taking "PILLS" SEP thinking about taking some of the excess respect I have for our Fallen Heroes and converting it in to Cold Hard Cash SEP jack: i will protect you from all rogue group dms. you are not a "Honkey" . Your an angel\nme: Im an angel. Im intelligent. Im not a honkey SEP i attribute my small dick to my low IQ, and my entire body being too dumb ass to send vitamins & minerals to my dick to make it normal sized SEP censership SEP here comes that ass hole. that bloated nit wit trying to scam us again. that howling jack-o-lantern. Boy id love to get a look at his pecker SEP thinking of inventing a new type of person to get mad at on here. maybe people who carry too many keys around.. i dont know yet SEP since opinoins are judged based on how new they are, instead of how good they are, today i will make $1000 by posting "Rap music is hipster" SEP do any of you know any good lawyers that i can sue you with SEP Im told that it\'s wrong to think that Mickey mouse would have 1 million dollars if he was a real person. Im told my beliefs are trash SEP the varicose vein gamer SEP struting around in my stepson cowboy hat looking for an ass kicking SEP expliaining to wife what the phrase "pussy nexus: beyond pussy" means and why it has appeared on my credit card statement like 8 times SEP Not My Problem SEP you may now buy the pdf Version of the book for $8 \ni will shut the fuck up now. thank you SEP whos that. SEP fine then you can just skim through and look at t he pictures like a damn toddler SEP availble now...\nDril Official "Mr. Ten Years" Anniversary Collection\nthe real deal\n SEP i Fucking hate it when i come at the king and miss, especially when I best not do that SEP i am the "Walter Cronkite" of game stop. yes i absolutely said it, and no im not deleting it this time. SEP would like to see the myth busters come back to tackle the myth that its illegal to open other peoples mail SEP i bet the three stooges would be pissed if they figured out the name of their show. they probably think its called "the three normal guys\' SEP i now concede that girls may be allowed to wear UNDERARMOUR™ brand clothing; but only if they sign a contract stating its for sports reasons SEP the worst part of nationalism is having to pretend the flag is really good, like "yeah the country looks exactly like that. they nailed it" SEP they need to put nets up in the baseball fields to catch all the homers. youre wasting so many good baseballs and it makes me sick SEP people will tell me shit like "oh you cant say kofi annan was no fap. no evidence" and i say, how dare you sully a mans grave, with politics SEP kicking the shit out of a tree with a sledge hammer, to increase my Stamina SEP guys think if they squat my user name on emerging social media platforms ill give them $1000 for it , instead of just calling them a Bitch SEP pleased to report that an angel has lifted the curse against me after doing my "Good Deed" of the year, by tipping a waiter 15% SEP retiring into the portable dog kennel i live in and shutting the tiny gate to keep the shit heads out SEP agreed, SEP baffled as to why the powers that be would insist that me, my Hotwif,e & paramour Hubby can not enlist in the marines together as a Squadron SEP tha;ts what a pervert would say SEP stay at home rat SEP go whack off else whare SEP fuck it , if youre still anonymous in 2018 you are 100% a pervert SEP "I Hereby Sign Over All Content Publishing Rights To \'Paul Dochney,\' My Agent And Master" - WINT SEP the bobs big boy milkshake mix up has become Racial. i repeat, the bobs big boy milkshake mix up has become Racial. SEP when one of the boys tells me he has to use the bathroom i inevitably respond with some stupid shit like "Alright, Sounds Good" SEP wasting other people;s Emotional Labor, by posting public screeds about the coming retribution of Lunchables Snack Packs SEP steel reserve 211 extra high gravity breast milk SEP they should make web 2.0 slot machines that show the faces of your loved ones instead of shit like cherrys, the number 7, and the word "Bar" SEP i love being the guy at pitch fork whose job it is to argue that thr greatest song of all time is "You Aint Nothin But A Hound Dog" by elvis SEP the road is a battle field, all the other cars are your enemies, and not using turn signals gives you an Advantage against then SEP EFFECTIVE IMMEDIATELY: homer simpson will stop saying "D\'oh" and will instead say "Fuck" , as the Creators originally intended 30 years ago SEP first they ignore you\nthen they laugh at u\nthen you jack off & read posts for 30 years\nthen you die of pulmonary heart disease \nthen you Win SEP the army: forbidden from jacking off. ~99% kill shot rate \nthe mafia: encouraged to jack off. cant kill guys unless theyre tied to chairs SEP i can just tell all of you are going to be a bucnh of little shits today and rat fuck me out of another pulitzer price by not retweeting me SEP $1000000 Post: julian assange walking out of the ecuadoran embassy covered in shit and saying do not go in there like ace ventuera SEP i gotta say it folks. breast milk tastes like SHIT., "Sorry ladies" SEP every one on this web site is this guy SEP had that dream again. a Top Female Influencer grasped my hand and took me to my Forever Home..where i never have to demean myself by posting SEP when a web site asks if i want to see their "New Design" it is the exact same thing as a man asking if i want to see his penis and ass SEP Cnan I have some please SEP the games they\'re putting out these dsys. Damn. Theyre so good that you never even see gamers with depression anymore SEP "To my unfollowers, I will strive to reexamine my content strategies, and do my best to earn back your follow."\nNOt. Eat my Fuckin shit SEP Shut Ya Fuckin Mouth SEP realm of Lamar SEP #InternationalSelfCareDay riding hood of my 18wheeler freaking out getting shaken baby syndrome & turning red like a boiled crab sucking ass SEP some one please help this man SEP mario is back SEP this codger is an absolute mate... the lad is a flintstone SEP your damn right im a some of a bitch. soorryest some of a bitch i ever met SEP you know what wo uld be fun, would be if twitter hq just dumped a truck full of wet turds on my front lawn every day "In case I missed it" SEP tuesday morning is " Low Engagement " , which means if you absolutely must have a melt down over Followbacks now\'s the time to do it SEP sending my most powerful kisses to all pregnant women fire fighers SEP making a Fairly solid argument that tthe same societal sickness that led to Minstrel Shows manifests itself today as "Doggo Shit" SEP it is a Content Curator\'s solemn duty, to post links to shit, without freaking out under the intense scrutiny of the craven, impotent masses SEP reminder that if you block me after sending me a message, i am unable to respond to it SEP what the fuck is Salt life please SEP if the pigs decimate my follower count tomorrow–Know this. followers are just a number. devoid of meaning. and they can never take my Likes SEP it is said that if "BILL GATES" dropped a $100 Bill, it would be a waste of his time to have everoyone within the perimeter terminated SEP you call this a menu?? where the FUCK are the Heart Healthy Essentials SEP there is no act more intimate & sensual than browsing a mans "Like" page , and clicking on there without permission is the ultimate betrayal SEP thinking about getting some miniature Gibson guitar replicas box framed, and hanging thenm up for the boys to come over and look at SEP the most bone headed move is to just go out and about with a name like "scooter." that shit sucks. Hell no. i would not even name a dog that SEP but its "Tailored for you" SEP this is an attack. you are attacking me SEP oh look–i failed my forklift operators certification for the 4th fucking time becausse none of the girls on here bothered fucking helping me SEP sending slowmo footage of my balls undearneath the bathtub faucet being pulverized by the water pressure to ameicas funniest home videos SEP i would take so many bribes if i was a judge. half my shit would be bribes. take bribes from the criminals until theyre too poor to do crime SEP a dog should never stand on its hind legs for any reason. that is for humans to do only and they look like fucked up chickens SEP using the skills i learned of mario to traverse a real life pile of crates SEP meeting up with ErnieTheBlade and ChaosWendell at shakeshack to discuss the depravity of bobbed hair SEP do not make my life a living hell SEP Reminder that we are no longer mailing locks of our own hair to girls, in 2018 . SEP yanny, and laurel, "SUCKS" !!!! Im back bitch SEP Gasping for piss SEP do not "Like brigade" me SEP big news gang. another A++ app from the theranos company to help me keep track of all my silver ware. let me just say. Wow SEP my followers know im the go-to Bitch when it comes to interior wood paneling, so if i say its a "no buy", the shit has become seirious SEP TODAY:\n- pissed some body off\n- got my ass kicked\n- Pissed myself\n- got piss kicked into my ass\n- ANd its only 2:01 AM. SEP theyre minds have evolved beyond germs SEP networking with my friends on here SEP forgetting if "taking the knee" is good or bad relative ot my belief system but getting pissed off at every mention of knees just to be safe SEP Seve jobs, bill gates, and Albert Einstein sitting at a table, enjoying a glass of Single Oak Barrel Whiskey , While i watch and smile. SEP i proudly skim the amount of $17.76 off of all my employees paychecks, because they do deserve pain SEP just downloaded some of the most all time realistic vagina pics, to my $100 computer SEP the crack of the bat. the scent of a verdant field. The excitement of the crowd. These are the things that piss base ball fans off the most SEP Wanker ! Come off it SEP summoning. the bang bus SEP pain man SEP its like i always say folks "you gotta follow my account to get the posts" SEP im strong enough that i could pull one o f my teeth out right now but i dont want to SEP banking on becoming one of those guys that consistently sucks so much ass tthat people arent allowed to own me anymore because its boring SEP stepping into fiveguys hq, just listing hundreds of brand new chef-inspired value combos off the top of my head. Boom. just like that. 1 2 3 SEP hauling ass to the hair place to find tekken chauncey and laying into him with a rolled up newspaper while hes getting a Perm SEP the show wife Swap but for gaming set ups SEP im the one guy on earth who thought it was cool that google glass would allow you to look at your dick and make it shrink/change colors SEP the 3 poossible reactions i have to tweets\n1) nodding sagely\n2) slapping forehead & saying "Aw man!"\n3) adding it to my muted word list SEP we told this man that he has the brain power of a thousand state legislators . you will remember His smile forever SEP dont even think about serving me food from taco bell that isnt served to me Méxicano Style SEP wearing the wrong damn shoes to the basketball court, getting freaked on like a Dunce, getting my ass kicked stupidly SEP i challenge any man who thinks that my 7 handsome border collies are too loud through-out the day to a round of Chess, the game of kings SEP The state of the qua;lity of the posts on my feed has never been more fucked. And every one is too busy touching their Penis to give a shit. SEP having my druthers— and eating them too SEP desperate Husband , sitting on the toilet and palm mashing all the buttons on the bathroom jukebox trying to get bob seger back on SEP i love thinking about shit that is "Asethetic" and looking at it and saying how much of good it is SEP Go To My Ass SEP the repliers know whats best for my posts. i love to roll over like a dog and let them shit all over my face until its unrecognizable SEP ruinning a mans wedding by using too many ad Hominem arguments SEP concerned about t he health of my followers, many of whom appear sickly and have chapped, unwashed elbows, stained with grime SEP the boys held an intervention about me "Going hollywood" because i;ve been buying plastic toothpicks now SEP the basketball version of a home run is when you throw a basketball really hard at the roof and get it stuck in the rafters some how SEP fully embracing the power of Social Media at the age of 56 and changing my name to Kim Jong Lexus SEP Wow thifs blew up. While your here please have a look at this: htttp://www.burgerking.com SEP extremely getting a uti by usnig the same shirt i used to wipe my dogs mouth to wipe piss off of my dick SEP paying a loud, 200 IQ man wearing a sweat band $500 a month to make videos telling me how to wipe my ass properly SEP thinking i only have about 80000 more posts to read before i figure out the precise amount of sex that should be allowed in pepsi commercals SEP this feed is protected by grandma SEP oh? you want me to take the bad santa posters off my car windows? sorry, i forgot that its a fucking fedearal crime to think things are good SEP if somone cooks your goose, thats it. youre basically fucked SEP John Lee Hooker: Boom boom boom boom (guitar riff)\nme: hm pretty good. What else you got\nJohn Lee Hooker: Hau hau hau hau\nme: Fuck this . SEP #worldturtleday these beasts are simply armoured rats ,always and forever SEP babies cant smile. its a biological reflex from the brain stem. its fake. they dont know how to smile SEP Ok bitch write "Telomere Mindfulnness" on a piece of paper. Go to Golds gym on 23rd, hand the paper to "Eddie" & tell him youre ready to Die SEP Time to show these douscebags my real power (throws a big tree branch at a guys car) SEP seeing the cops in the rear view, telling everyone to "stay cool" and cutting hard into the guardrail to flip my car on purpose SEP (after getting split in half by a 16-inch bullet fired from a boat) waiter theres a fly in my Soup SEP ME: What do you mean the plane departed. The clock says its only 8:25.\nTICKET AGENT: Sir Thats a clock\nME: I know SEP james bonds jet black diapers that cost $200 each. suit jacket that has Jame bonds signature drawn on the pocket. james bond engagement ring SEP the guy who hooks me up with Raw Milk locked his account. too many people posted "come to brazil" at him so i guess ill starve to death now SEP before you threaten to "Pimp slap" me, please remember that i am a police officer of the law, on at least four separate timeline\'s SEP "octo mom" will never be allowed to join mensa or the fortune 500. just saying the damn truth like it is SEP -tweeting about stuff thats off-topic is "Random". never do this.\n-tweeting about current event stuff is "Topical". and this is also a crime SEP getting pecked by birds like a dick head SEP absolute bastard . of all the fingers you couldve given me, it had to be the middle one SEP (witnessing the flaming wreckage of a 6-car pile up) ah. Respect. More power SEP do not ever come to my gym with crayons and draw smiley faces all over the walls. i will put your ass in the gutter. i will knock you over SEP im thinking now, about how pissed off i\'d get if i was dining at a 4-star restaurant and the waiter came out 100% nude. do not do that shit SEP sorry SEP yes thats what i meant. thank you SEP one matrix pill is Pitbull Holocaust. the other is Pitbull Revolution. i wont say which is which because i dont want people to get mad at me SEP why do you want to kill dogs SEP my dick is in the news agian. and Ouh, whats this?? The damn gas prices are sky rocketing while everyones distracted. Trite. SEP wife wont speak to me because i thought the movie "night at the muesum" was a porno film about a guy fucking suits of armor or something SEP using genius Journalism to crush my enemies . . . SEP injecvting a shit ton of steroids and walking on the treadmill at 3mph SEP get a education SEP Why SEP ass gas and grass. i love to drive my car for free SEP trolls: do something productive instead of beatinh your weiners on my page. there are so many birds flying around indoors who need help SEP helping women by inventing a portable bra dispenser , for when they are on the go SEP gathering data on various of bastards SEP my dog approaches me, rolls over on its back, and i vomit all over its stomach. undoing 9 years of trust with this animal SEP what are the odds, that the letters on the license plate i saw today would just happen to spell "MR.PIMP" SEP a-list: time line\nb-list: group dm\nc-list: shit i yell in the car with the windows rolled up\nd-list: shit i say while melting down in court SEP someone out there is making $1000 every time a person clicks on this SEP neo pets cinematic universe SEP saying im going to flip "doug the pug" aorund in mid air with devil sticks . is not a death threat SEP lunch paraphernalia spilling out of the footwell of my car as i pull up to my old high school to steal footballs SEP by calling them "Stackers" instead of quesadillas, taco bell is legally allowed to fill them with 49% bird shit SEP In poor taste. SEP Cheer\'s bitch SEP people on here treat me like dirt , thats fine, meanwhile hundreds of teens are allowed to go to prom racistly every day SEP strategically gathering recon on little seasers pizza in the woods behind the strip mall and getting fucking lyme disease SEP drinking beer out of a humming bird feeder because all of my glasses have bug\'s in them SEP the pain of losing my life savings is softened by the big mommas house themed slot machine screaming lines from the famous movie, at me SEP inventing a new Suit of playing cards: "The Horseshoes"\n- We got the king, queen, jack and Ace. All your favorites\n- The most powerful suit SEP three sayings to any fool who would claim that i am the bitch of this website:\n1.your god damn right\n2. i dont give a fuck\n3. you Lose SEP imagining a judge sentencing a beautiful lady criminal to be my wife , and saying "Oh thats good" SEP sponsored by God SEP When Ur Girl Is "On Point" - Hooking U Up With That Gold Bond Medicated Powder - Because She KNOw That The Dick Good SEP another blissfful day ignoring the fact that 75% of my peers on this site have been rejected from offline society for pretty good reasons SEP The Dick Head On Team Chat Whose Smoke Detector Needs A New Battery: Does any one in here know how to fedex a pit bull SEP how advanced our society has become.. merely 100 years ago you would receive little to no praise for posting the words "Bart Flintstone" SEP seems to me i am one of the only people on this earth who knows exactly how high they stack shit. SEP The Pillsbury Dip Shit SEP the jury is still out on whether building giant statues of my head pleases god, or pisses Him off SEP due to recent events, i have generously reduced my weekly donation to cambridge analytica by 40%. And nobody is reporting this SEP every one wants to read my 200-page manifestos about how i refuse to make eye contact with my dentist, or "Get me a man who does both" SEP discreetly getting my ass kicked SEP it is nothing short of miraculous that all the rich people on this website are personal friends of mine, and care about me, and know my Pain SEP #worldpenguinday please cancel whatever the fuck this is and make a global holiday for oinline content producers with ring worm please. SEP the Ten click challenge, invented by buddihst monks to enhance Discipline , asks that we limit ourselves to click on only ten things per day SEP mother fuck Big Gulp ass SEP prepare to meet thy Focker SEP dont trust the dna tests. i determine my ancestry by looking at a bunch of racist cartoon characters to see which ones piss me off the most SEP tekken Chauncey is no longer invited to boys brunch after saying that he would like to karate chop the #royalbaby in the stomach SEP cut the crap 2017 SEP un follow if you do not consider this true power SEP thinking of turning back into white (Caucasian) SEP having you tube intellectuals explain to me how exactly humpty dumpty fucked up , and why he deserves to die SEP no!! all of you, stotp it!! please! the insight is too Raw!! SEP reported for Flame Baiting . SEP waking up in a cold sweat and screaming about needing one million dollars, the amount of money made famous by Dr. Evil in austin powers 1 . SEP its fine. i spray it with a hose before eating it SEP hard core SEP good thing im not a child SEP please join me iin eating one hundred bags of romaine lettuce if you are sick of the CDC rubbing their ass in our faces, with politics SEP i will end your pain SEP this is the bad watch thread. post bad watches here. if your reply does not have a bad watch in it you will be blocked SEP having to hose off 900 screaming animals at my job at the zoo every day is harder than any thing a untied states marine ever did SEP pissed off by the idea of my ass becoming grass SEP $5 poison vs $100,000 poison.. which kills more Rats SEP Im now receiving reports which confirm that barbara bush was electrocuted in a swimming pool. Developing SEP thinking about taking all of the logs out of my fire place and using it as a gamer cave SEP thinking about a adults version of star wars where all the characters have Depression and saying the word "Bauzinga" to mysef in my car SEP i will not do it. SEP `` i will show you the Ass of God `` SEP i love coming on here every day to interact with a growing network of "CON MEN" and "IMBECILES" SEP trying to celebrate all these days at once like a sitcom dipshit who accidentally booked 10 fancy dinners at the same time SEP #FineMenThatEatAss #FineMenThatEatPussy #FineMenThatDontCheat SEP regardless of if he\'s real or not . can we please just talk about how much bigfoot sucks ass. what has he done with his life SEP for the 9th time today a complete stranger has approached me on the street and told me to go suck some ass. "And still the brand endures" SEP patreon up by $4000/month since i got removed from out back steakhouse for calling all the waiters homos and became a Freedom of Speech guru SEP it pains me to announce that as of april 5th, 2018, The Economist has severed ties with "Da Ass Fucka" SEP youll never catch me sitting on the toilet, taking a huge shit ... it aint my style SEP people are giving and receiving Respect at incredible speeds ... and it is all thanks to the humble computer chip SEP trying really hard not to be Tryhard SEP I will leave the post up to piss off the people who are mad at it. I will remove the post later to piss off the rest of you SEP Guess what. Some people have opinions different that you, so shut the fuck up SEP i try to have fun on here, i try to post something nice, and all of you freaks brutally piss all over me. Im done SEP update from the good time line—Bacion is legal to eat at work thanks to President Banksy in the whitehouse, now known as the star wars house SEP elmer fudd with yakuza tattoos. legion of fudd SEP (getting really into the dunk tank carnival game) Ill show you some pain mother fucker. Ill show you some pain mother fucker SEP please continue it outside of my mentions you Ghouls SEP ufo themed wedding thwarted by sjw `s SEP flipping your car on purpose is even more of an olympic game, than the actual olympic games SEP penning a heartwarming screen play about a horse who wins nascar SEP i just need to say, to anyone reading this.. You are Important, You are loved, and You belong in this world, if you have over 5000 followers SEP ???? SEP they got him SEP they both do it SEP his account was shut down by the police. SEP i regret to inform you, that by resorting to Swear language, you have forfeit this debate. Farewell my bitch SEP the absolute perfect shit is scoring a legendary forum handle like "Farkimedes" and making 30,000 posts asking the mods to move threads SEP imagining the guys on Shark Tank laying into the guy who invented the fucking porky pig character "What were you thinking !!" SEP executing some advanced high-risk transactions on the Markets. trading my ass medicine for dick medicine SEP your;e damn right im calm. you bet your ass im acting like a normal person SEP the vatican should not be allowed to name any new saints until God sorts out my numerous issues with the citibank web portal SEP Hm lets see. Do I "Shut the fuck uop", or continue exposing the truths of life to the chagrin of the 99% of people on earth who are villains SEP living vicariously through gamer streamers who are more powerful than me SEP Yeah. Also he sold his account to buzz feed in 2015 and his psots arent even that good SEP just a few of my Media Accolades... Still think im "Bs"??? SEP face news SEP If youre a milennial who doesnt know what a Farm is "You are part of the aids" SEP 8 Words We Must Never Say In Front Of Father (Number 6 Will Make You Shit) SEP thinking about shit that i Recognize and smiling SEP thats right bitch. i single handedly rescued the constitution of the united states...AND I DID IT WITH OUT USING POLITICS !! SEP Thinking About Saying The Rent Is Too Damn Hi SEP if you have trouble discerning the "Family Room" from the "Living Room" your house should be taken away from you SEP tellling my miserable wife and sons all about the Importance of Media SEP i just think this is the sort of thing that would be nice to have SEP thank you. Theyre all crooks SEP thank you for getting me mny coffee SEP kiss my Thug ass SEP oh dear lord SEP Getting fucking pissed off at the idea of some child from the early 1900s trying to spit shine my shoes SEP whenever i see one of those roast pigs with apple in its mouth i think "Now theres a real son of a bitch who made the wrong choices in life" SEP my failing brand SEP seeing people performing perfect slam dunks on the basketball court is worthless to me. It;s nothing SEP piss me off forever, kiss the dog shit out of my ass mouther fucker #ShutYourYap SEP Trying to get clicked on SEP just read a fascinating article, about how people who try to "Fuck" have the same chemical imbalances in their brain, that the cave men had SEP Kicking the shit out of the back board on my computer desk because" Dabbing" is bull shit SEP he changed his mind SEP Thread. The dog who died in a united airlines overhead bin was a deep state Chaos Agent. Thread, Thread SEP every day this happens: my followers inject me with a mix of chemicals , And they kill me as they would a sick dog. Every day they do this SEP This Shit Sucks Dog Shit SEP i piss on your little emails SEP i despise the toilet. id love nothing more than to kick it through the wall and shatter it into 100 shards of wet porcelain. But i need it SEP Today , I am every Husband SEP there were 100 browser games in the 2000s where the goal was to become a Pimp by sending links to people, but thats jsut real life now SEP unlock your account you Freak SEP go ahead. keep screaming "Shut The Fuck Up " at me. it only makes my opinions Worse SEP I am going to try to have diarrhea today. Because I am not "DEFINED" by my ass SEP i would never say something like "Fuck the games world and all its wonderful and mysterious locales. Fuck mario" . i just would not say that SEP u are a hate crime. go to bed SEP my boss called me a "Pussy" for not wiping my ass SEP Bot. SEP doing head stands to let the cum from my balls flow directly to my brain and make me more intelligent SEP trying to get the girls chat recognized as a hate gruop SEP Wine and stimpy SEP i fuck all cereal SEP #NationalCerealDay i fuck all cereal SEP it was a different time. i no longer believe in sex SEP posting detailed plans aobut how im going to start trying out different shampoos on a gaming forum at age 52 SEP crawling around on the kitchen floor like a fucking dick head and filming my own "Beggin Strips" commercials SEP #NationalOreoDay i spit on oreo SEP #nationalOreoday i will henceforth either "Fuck" or "Spit on" all the "national whatever day" hashtags that the NSA pays twitter to promote SEP in the year 2030 , "You will be able to order food on the cell phone" SEP loathsome animal SEP his last account had over 10000 but you tube deleted it SEP this is the new logo. if you want to contact me you have to put the new logo in the email and send it to me. please get rid of the old logo SEP to clarify, i still think that "Porky Pig" should get the electric chair, but not enough to kill him, just enough to Scare him a little bit SEP bringing the mame cabinent into my spider hole SEP restuarants need to start hanging up pictures of their bathrooms outside so i know what im getting before i walk in the damn place SEP going down to the bank to yell at all the workers there and tell them to keep their greasy mitts off of my stash SEP microwaving my ass hole in the microwave SEP thinking of being appointed the official "Bitch" of the NFL SEP thinking of that 9/11 thread on the pokemon board i used to post on where the Admin said "Welcome to World War 3" & everyone shit them selves SEP now where talkin SEP The Vagina Monologues, But For Gamers SEP up until i was about 28, i thought "the 9 to 5 " was a euphemism for blasting cum SEP fuck the "left shark " SEP fucking awful SEP im going my own way SEP completing my "Dip Shit" look by donning a humongous bib with a picture of a sailboat on it SEP I politely requested the post to be taken down. It is still up ass of 2/24/18. It is only fair that the check mark be transferred to my page SEP blue mark accts continue to be given "Carte Blanche" to take big filthy shits all over my career & my beliefs while dances to the Bank SEP as far as im concerned. "fidget spinners" is DEAD IN THE WATER SEP Take this donw SEP seems to me, life is aoubt "STICKS"\nAge: 1-20 : Selfie Stick\nAge 21-90: Walking stick SEP call me old fashioned, but I donr think waiters should spit in the customers food. Keep it to the toilet or kiss that tip GOOD-BYE SEP clowns should spend less time making balloon animals and more time making Prayer\'s SEP people who like getting whacked in the balls; that shit sucks. youre outta your mind SEP #TrumpColluded with my freaking nut sack . print this you cowards SEP hard at work in the Study, pen in hand, orchestrating my next public melt down SEP thinking that going to Harvard to increase your IQ is something people do once every few months like getting your hair cut SEP Thats what they do. They rile you up with nonsense posts just so they can call the cops on you and get you arrested. Its called "Intrapment" SEP "Games rules." - the unknown gamer; c. 1998 SEP i can confirm that favs are "crypto" SEP time to look at the "Moments Tab". i lay down in the bath tub and a guy smears shit all over my chest with his ass while using a taser on me SEP "mr. bucket" now theres a guy who clearly does not have his shit together SEP I NEED IT! TO BASK WITH IN THE GLOW OF THE BLUE CHECK MARK! THE CELEBS NEED ME! AND I NEED THEM! MORE THAN ANY THING! MORE THAN ANYTHING! SEP ???: The hole at the bottom of the toilet is the toilets ass hole\nreplyguy34: Thats fine\nreplyguy29: Babababababa\nreplyguy93: This, actually SEP seems like more and more, every young professional should have at all times, a bag to keep papers in SEP in my book im making SEP it is decided from this moment forward, i will not be clicking on any "SCAM LINKS" SEP for some reason. people get upset when i say the markets are down because of Bill Watterson\'s beloved print media staple "Calvin and Hobbes" SEP listening to the song "Shortnin Bread" on repeat 7 hours a day and forming some very complicated opinions upon Race SEP whoever the fuck "iamath" from glasgow is\n1) please dont use my email to make snap chat accounts\n2) your dick looks like absolute shit SEP Just got chemical castrated in exchangge for a free oil change at pep boys #Dealmaker #Boss SEP hate it when my boss knocks out the front leg of my desk with a baseball bat and funko pop lego shit flies every where SEP worst western SEP i have proof that the women on here are forming quotetweet gangs to "freak out" and intimidate uncircumcised guys SEP oh for fuck sake . SEP mlg streamer "BeastModeCosby" loses geforce sponsorship after allegedly using a performance enhancing bed pan SEP "CODGER LOOSES HIS LUNCH WHILE HAVING A WANK" SEP IF IT PLEASES THE COURT, ID LIKE TO POST SOME EXTREMLY RELATABLE SHIT: SEP $̶$̶$̶$̶$̶ SEP shut thef fuck up you dip shits SEP io love helping the economy by fucking up while doing downloads and getting 100 coin miners installed on my pc SEP please do not ruin super bowl sunday with this sort of hting SEP waiting the customary 20 minutes after someone in the group dm says one of their pets died before posting a picture of sponge bob Nutting SEP thinking going to the Kingdom of Heaven for fucking one trillion years is a fairly nice deal SEP thinking about getting the dow jones back on track, simply by making a few phonecalls. but certain people have been a bitch to me, so i wont SEP Time and time Again. People on here Fuck me over and ruin my life. simply for starting the Dialouge SEP #GroundhogDay is the one day a year where the nation can put asaide the partisan politics and sacrifice a large rodent to God SEP due to budget constraints the ground hog this year has been replaced by a caged man in a loincloth who also fears shadows SEP interstate shut down due to reports of 600 pound man chasing a windswept bra SEP been thinking about it a lot, and i do not believe that anyone will ever come up with a brand name better than "Taster\'s Choice" SEP in light of the slender man case id like to remind my followers that teens have also attempted murder in the name of digimon otis SEP just thoguht of a tiny man standing inside of a toilet. waving a turd in with batons like the airport guys. shopping the idea to buzz feed SEP putting all my monitors ad computer stuff on top of the stove i never use so that i have more space to carry out my life style SEP 1/29/18: i do not want to think about or look at the word "Tater Tots" SEP getting my naval cavity laser removed because i just remembered an article i read in 1997 about how people in Spain were doing it SEP Your names not actually "chinese rock" SEP "cmon!! post it!"\nOh no, i couldnt possibly. Its too fucked up. Too raw\n"cmon!! ya gotta post it!"\nVery well: NHL Players should wear hijabs SEP if you have less than 1000 followers i can guarantee you that me and the boys share your posts in vip chat rooms and call you a "Muthafucka" SEP "The people who say i should get a life are the real ones who should get a life" - Hamdan bin Mohammed Al Maktoum , Crown Prince of Dubai SEP buiying up all the graphics cards and making them cost over $1000 so i can computer generate my own new episodes of "Arli$$" SEP Many consider Reddit,com to be the "Front Page" of the internet, and yet, in the year 2018, I am called a Bastard for saying this. SEP i pay a man $3000.00 a month to stream line my feed so i can get more jokes per second about putin saying "hold my beer" or what have you SEP explaining to the boys at the auto shop what the "you know i did it to him" man is iwth the inflection one might use to discipline a child SEP love when i lose aobut 100 followers immediately after making a beautiful post. the weak shriveling up into dust. Thats called darwin SEP looking for medicines that will make the fish in my koi pond shit less often SEP saying it again: my nick name is "Mr Shut the Fuck Up" because i tell people to shut the fuck up not because i love shutting the fuck up SEP i helped make this so its good. check it out. like and subscrihe SEP remove me from this conversation please SEP the floor of the new york stock exchange breathlessly awaiting MetalGearEric\'s review of the BK Rodeo Whopper before erupting in chaos SEP thinking of wrapping my entire body in barbed wire and becoming Sovereign SEP Just saw it on CNN: Thyere coming out with a new batman #NewBatman SEP me and my friend bill gates live in fort knox now and if theres one thing i enjoy laughing all the way to its the bank SEP eating shit sucks ass. and sucking ass sucks shit SEP daffy and donald duck: "SAME SHIT , DIFFERENT ASS HOLE" SEP falling down a stair case completely unscathed after executing a perfect series of Block techniques SEP people whose retweets equal endorsements belong in a fucking cage SEP #Trumps1stYearAtHogwarts SEP 2017: writing shitty articles called like "Disruption: The Praxis of Chaos"\n2018: saying astronauts put tubes up their ass to suck the turds out SEP cajun seasoning and old bay seasoning might seem quite similar, but closer examination will reveal that one of them is far more Racist SEP I own the best law firm in the tri-state area, my wife earns $200,000 a year making ginger bread houses, and we will never hire a US Veteran SEP I refuse to provide counsel to one who sees fit to carry the user name "Gay Horny" . SEP i could not help but notice that everyone you see online is either really a dumb ass, or genius, or average intelligence SEP optimizing my hyper links, for the fiscal year, SEP Thinking about saying "Fuck" on SNL. What my brand needs most right now is for me to say "Fuck" on SNL. How do i get to go do that SEP extracting rare metals from my jeans SEP The ultimate weopon SEP this page is now protected from dick heads and shit heads SEP ive decided that it is Anti-Jobs, to demonetize the youtube guy who went to Mecca and flung angrybird plushies at the cube or whatever SEP im at Ces baby. they got an app that makes your phone do gun noises and fat wet asses, flying around goerge jetson style SEP overseeing my pages, patiently watching all the guys i follow do their \'Bits\' and mentallly assigning them to various demeaning castes SEP you need to get off my case first off because yourre on here posting yourself in italian black face and upsetting people SEP #LawEnforcementAppreciationDay i appreciate my god given right to enforce the law all over this web page SEP getting shot directly in the ass execution style while crawling through a duct SEP im dumb as a slab of turds, and i am Here for it SEP due to my latest getting pissed off, i shall hence forth refer to Turner Classic Movies as "toilet classic movies" SEP gravitational waves huh., is that like the super moon SEP journalism is the hardest job on earth...I have to look at so many sites, and everyones trying to trick me into posting pics of my whole ass SEP here SEP jh SEP #ImNotAntisocialImJust an imbecile that smells like guinea pig cage SEP please just try it. SEP the only font i like now SEP the epic shit of 2017; is the boys getting TheSegaPimp fired from his job at The Red Cross for not wishing me a "Happy Halloween" SEP if youre going to ride my a$$... at least Fuck my car SEP (folloiwng the waiter to his car) Sir. Sir. Can you confirm or deny that the Southwestern Chipotle Chicken Paninis here are "Chef Inspired" SEP cameras are off now. everyones diapers are frozen to each other and 1000 us marines are now separating them all with swords. horrible scene SEP Thread SEP Its not even a popular toy anymore SEP Used to be you could get on stage & say stuff like "Tickle me elmo fucks" and people wiould shower you with praise. Standards are now higher SEP This has been being said by people. SEP let us be very clear on one thing, with all of these posts going around. tickle me elmo, does not "Fuck" . Youre out of your mind SEP friendly reminder to all of my followers not to commit any Crimes in 2018. crimes are 2017 shit "Miss Me With That" SEP the ultimate SEP Its smart SEP me: May the coffee be with you. Beer is the red 100 to me\nintelligent Bill Gates: You are a Fraud. Confess SEP by getting really mad at poeople for having their dick sucked SEP barbaro alive horse 2017 . fake death SEP letting millionaires shit all over my house and piss on my pets for $0 SEP being a dumb ass on here is fucking Stupid SEP my friend the only crypto currency you wanna get your hands on is this: bird seed. There is a lot of birds and they all gotta eat SEP abusing my vile neighbors by putting leaflets around which state that i am now to be referred to as "Daddy\'s Golden Goose" SEP I lpove making my credit rating lower by having my wife painted on the side of my car SEP you know what they say..if you fail constantly, if everyone thinks you suck ass, and you do other bad things. "You will get $1,000,000 soon" SEP fucked up my hand while trying to pry open a jar of cherries with a Shuriken SEP just fired 300 Journalists . And it feels so good SEP Geting my ass kicked by italian guys in the tiny bathroom at the back of the bus SEP Whats great is I can get online & read 100 peoples opinions about Kevlar Vests, and at least 2 of them are guaranteed to be probably correct SEP Fuck your gears SEP worst part of being my masseuse is having to suffer a 5 minute monologue before hand about how i think your job is actually extremely normal SEP people who try to read my posts out loud in public get their ass beat. they get jumped and put out to pasture SEP " And the beast which I saw was like unto a leopard, and his feet were as the feet of a bear, and his mouth as the mouth of a lion: and the dragon gave him his power, and his seat, and great authority. " SEP as wander my study, Quill Pen in one hand, Whisky in the other, i muse, one might perhaps take me for a Famous Author, from the days of old, SEP pregcore SEP absolutely disgraceful SEP i would love to lift all of my pathetic, frail followers by the ankles and huck them like tomahawks SEP Wow , imagine an office where the employees are not just allowed to have fun... its ENCOURAGED SEP My User Experience Conditions - 12/17/17 :\n- Will click only 3 links today\n- Muting the word "Bluray"\n- Unmuting the word "Wendys" SEP Maximum Security Gamestop SEP sometimes i wonder if i could slice EpicWayne in half with one swing of the blade. but its probably really hard to SEP getting a 4k monitor so i can make posts SEP the more i think about it , the more it seems to me that apes look like fucked up versions of humans SEP running some scams out of my scam tent SEP cave man: ou ou ou,. keep net neautral so me can download Porno\nMonopoly guy: why not jack off to a Turner Classic Movie instead SEP \' george bush master of porno \' SEP Stand My Ground Mother Fucker SEP people ask me on here, what is the reason for the season. The reason for the season. is of course, " SANTA " SEP the mall santas all shit into a salad bowl hidden beneath their throne and the elves have to go wash it out in the fountain every hour or so SEP some fool\'s just need to be knocked the crap out of SEP Give this the retweet if you agree that ALL beanie babies deserve to be worth $100 , and also that Water boarding is not tortore SEP funds removed from 1000s of accounts, markets crash, after deranged poster says that charles schwab & company "touches there self at night" SEP friendly reminder that if you do not heed enough of the friendly reminders on your timeline, you may sever 1 finger as penance SEP im sorry the trolls bugged my office and everyone had to hear me say "heres your sign" over and over again in a shitty bill engvall voice. SEP just had the check Mark for 6 mins, but lost it by posting a picture of the back of some guys head with the caption "White people be out here" SEP Can i citizens arrest girls SEP just set up My Quicken Loans accounts for a whole small ecuadorian village, entirely on chrystal meth. keep doing your little posts though . SEP VERIFY!! VERIFIY THIS ACCOUNT! THE TROLLS ARE BREAKING IN THROUGH THE WINDOWS!! I NEED THE CHECK MARK !! NOW!! NOW!! NOW!! SEP my promise to my followers... is that i wil;l never become the "freak of the week" SEP getting pissed off at the idea of someone going on to wiki pedia and changing the name of the japanese suicide forest to "Warios Woods" SEP #WorldwideHandsomeDay looking dumb as a dog in my piss-yellow tuxedo whilst i spend hundres of dollars on international phone calls SEP at the advisement of my Probation officer .i will now be taking questions on the despised reddit .com with SEP ah man. how embarrassing. i chose the user name "CondomMaster" a long time ago, back when condoms were cool. dont look at it SEP i reserve the right to have reddit "Shut Down" if the questions become too rambunctious SEP hes the ceo of arbys now SEP just deleted some posts that may have been considered hostile towards people who like to show their dick in public. i was wrong on this one. SEP getting my pud Encrypted , like peter thiel SEP My friends love disapppointing me with whips SEP going ape shit at the gym. rotating in full 360 degrees with the boys, flawlessly synchronized SEP " nothing is stronger than power. " - qdoba_NoScope SEP i hereby disavow EpicWayne, who now says that my "ears are fucked-up shaped" , and that i "let dildos roll around in the footwell of my car" SEP nice mug.. the words should be on the side thoguh SEP im afraid i must say that i do not find the mysteries featured on "scooby-doo" challenging enough . SEP a reasonable compromise, would be to let the ISPs track our Gaming & reward more net neutraility to guys who get the most headshots & combos SEP ill speak no more of the "Show Us Your Turkey" thanksgiving event. as many have taken that as an invitation to send me their penis and balls SEP hope to make this somehwat of a tradition: the "Show Us Your Turkey" event. i\'d like to see your beautiful birds, on this thanksgiving day SEP can anyone link me some good User Agreements to click yes on, SEP due to timezone discrepancies i request a motion that all pictures of food in group dm be referred to as "Lunch pics", even if theyre dinner SEP getting pisse d off imagining my trolls and dissenters crawling around my house in little butler outfits and expecting tips SEP keurig is building a Mausque inside of a Dave and Busters, and Heres why it matters: SEP thre most classic shit is when somebody on tv or in real life says "What about lunch" SEP i hate i t when girls think im proposing whenever i take the knee at them in protest SEP dming all the accounts on here who pretend to be horny versions of smallville characters, demanding to know their long-term business plan SEP women aare setting unrealistic body standards by expecting me to wear a tuxedo 24/7 and to not flip out at waiters SEP the most disgusting accounts on here are making claims like, "Fred Flintstone is a pimp" , with zero evidence SEP my followers behave extremely errratically, like a bunch of sick animals, whenever i go "Out of character" to post aobut Mens Wearhouse SEP it is my displeasure to report that the TWITTER-MASTERCARD group has frozen my credit card for posting "The monster mash sucks" SEP i will never name my son "Rufus" . that, to me, is a dogs name SEP some one has got to stop this guy SEP my followers know i Abhor racism, but i especially dont agree with the thing from old cartoons where black people have dice for teeth SEP My dick is wearing a neck brace SEP this web site sucks my fucking dick. it sucks balls\n(they add the 280 characters)\nyou blew it. this website sucks shit now SEP pevrert SEP things the trolls won\'t allow me to have:\n- the blue check Mark\n- the 260 characters\n- a nice plaque that says "twitter power user" SEP reminder to all mh followers that if something i post catches your eye you can "Like " or share it to your friends w/ that re-tweet button SEP you will take your place upon the cross, you will bear every last "Tag" and suffer as i do SEP please do not embarrass me in front of "inside hoops". you dip shits. you fucking animals SEP i love getting my gun opinions from cartoon characters and capping government drones from 900 miles away before they blow my shitty house up SEP tthe best posts are the ones that are like, "Never tell some one with pectus excavatum to shut the fuck up" SEP posts: "the best stuff is in here" SEP the trolls hav been hiding "Easter Eggs" in my favorite DVD menus, to encourage exploration & experimentation at the cost of my leisure time SEP jacking off more often (due to Stress) and also jacking off less often (due to Stress) SEP twitter hiring sherlock holmes to prowl the office wih a magnifying glass and find the employee who posted "Aids piss" on the pizza hut acct SEP i spend a lot of time thinking about how good it would be if someone finally developed a sports app ,"For the fans" SEP consider this: the time and energy it took for you to tell me to "Shut the fuck up" could have instead been used to breast feed 10 orphans . SEP muting people who like to talk aobut "The news" instead of posting vignettes about being forced to pour mouthwash down their ass crack SEP thinking about running out of toilet paper and having to wipe my ass with like, dental floss, or a mouth wash bottle, and getting very upset SEP (speaking into phone) get me on the computer SEP if you add me to the dumb ass group chats full of guys i dont know you better believe im leaking that shit to the cops. i do not give a fuck SEP id love to do some posts on here SEP cruising the streets of night time in my Hyundai Sonata... looking for drunk drivers to ram into SEP my favorite combo, you ask? i\'ll not say to you. SEP you come on line and challenge me with a user name like "Lesbian Mr. Clean" , i will not respect you, regardless of your skill lefvel SEP ideally...Sleepys Mattress Professionals will get on board with printing "DRIL TWEETS" on-product, and pull both our brands out of the Abyss SEP delighting my friends and family by doing the chris rock routine about "The Big Piece of Chicken" but in a worse voice SEP obliterating my load with a blow torch SEP alvin and his chipmunks have not evaded my scorn SEP despite the most recent of shit my enemies are now saying, i will never be found, standing on my front lawn , using a "Hula hoop " SEP My followers are sick thugs, they are Debauched imps, and they love to be made to howl like dogs when i call them my little sewer bitch rats SEP I`ll not be watching the halloween themed episodes of "Wheel of Fortune", as I dont find them scary even a little bit. Please and thank you. SEP father wont stop opening my amazon boxes—How to proceed? (Self,Legal)\nTOP VOTED: put a live wire in his car & light his ass up. Cook his ass SEP thinking of abandoning dreams of becoming a Senator, so i can post about yelling "Fuck" in the bathroom because i accidentally became racist SEP in order to alleviate the stress of having to witness sub par content on my feed, several of my followers have suggested that i try "Heroin" SEP bewildered by this one star review of a pocket pussy from a verified buyer that is just the word "Stupid" SEP theres pills on amazon that make your loads bigger but the guys in the 1-star reviews say they give u diarrhea. dont know whats real anymore SEP I shall perform no new downloads , until this wolrd and the people of it can post along side each other in Harmony, I shall download no more SEP obliterating my illustrious career as "guy who assigns letter grades to southpark episodes" by begging girls to send me their dental records SEP activating $40 of "Cash Back" Chase Freedom rewards while the Low Engagement Accounts who troll me on here just shit around on their dicks SEP just put my elbow bthrough the monitor because i thought the cursor was a bug again. nevertheless this setback will not slow down my posting SEP my top advisors are drafting various contingency plans for when all my miscreant followers overdose to death on chilis southwestern eggrolls SEP BREAKING: Millionaire rapist rehab facility lost to random gas explosion—Dozens of 2nd chances tragically denied—"Mist of splinters & flesh" SEP i would appreciate it if my followesr called me "Sir" , like they would a Police Man, or any one else with the power to destroy their lives SEP Id like to sincerely apologize for being a beady eyed little fuck-freak. Im hell\'s shit. Im dog shit\'s ass. Brand me with a hot iron. Sorry SEP Wife says i should shit in the yard until the toilets fixed. Itll be ok if i cover myself in a tarp. But i want to shit in the broken toilet SEP i will drag you out of here kicking and screaming, but for the sake of protecting all girls from my horrendous posts SEP Everoyone please. Stop sending in things like "Cum" when snack brands do the "guess the mystery flavor" contest. They will stop doing them SEP ive decided \nA. every white colored food is vanilla flavored. especially popcorn. especially mayo\nB. this opinion will be shown on The News SEP im not saying i dont respect the flag. just saying id respect it more if it was a picture of something thats good to me. like someones lunch SEP just had a nightmare that my account was permanently suspended for referring to "the beach boys" as "the beach boy shit boys" SEP i love "Going hollywood" by retweeting burger king and lock heed martin 1000 times SEP just wasted an entire afternoon at the court house trying to copyright th e phrase "Trump look like a uncle" SEP seeing the words "Farm Fresco" on a billboard and having to pull the fuck over from becoming Overstimulated SEP "calling out" magnetGirl77 for telling me that my dick looks like "a piece of fried calamari" SEP folks if you think haunted house is scary this halloween i invite you to look at the damn economy and thj dow jones SEP TAKE THIS OFF LINE IMMEDDIATELY SEP this mother fucking snake who wrote this apartment listing is trying to pad the list of amenities with shit like "dart board" SEP just planted my big ass through a mans wind shield while trying to get my shirt out of a tree SEP propsoing to twitter a groundbreaking event called "The Banquet of Forgiveness" , where every blocked person on every account gets unblocked SEP thinking of replacing both of the license plates on my car with a picture of a different car SEP sick and tired of people assuming im taking a shit whenever i go to the bathroom,; while im actually just running my diaper under the sink SEP fdreaming of that special moment when i can look into my wifes eyes and say "Thank you. Thank you for marrying me" SEP if i do not get my postcount up to 5 digits by the end of this year my peers will forever think im a shit head and my account will be erased SEP ALERT: don pablos app has malware that photo shops your pics to make it look like youre crying & sends them to every girl on my contact list SEP if you put one of those 280 character junkheaps on my feed ill flip a coin to decide if i should block you. i will let God choose your fate. SEP top ten things you do NOT want to hear in the Nursing profession:\n10. Shut the fuck up \n9. Fuck you idiot\n8. Your pay check is in the trash SEP all of my followers are lousy hob goblins and all of the people who dont follow me are dirty dog ghouls SEP i live for th e sensation of adrenaline pumping through my spine when another person on here publicly accuses me of being "Off Brand" SEP hear this trolls: ive been secretly respecting the flag in the privacy of my garage for 12 hrs a day , maxing out its power to insane levels SEP mournful day fpr comedy fans, upon news that the wife character on "Kevin Can Wait" will be beheaded with a sword between seasons 1 and 2 SEP im pleased to report, that once again , beer has been voted the Coldest drink SEP yeauh, let me just follow the fucking "YouTube" account, on twitter. thats fucking normal SEP this is an attack on not just me , but all boys SEP looks like the circus is in town again SEP geting a bunch of reptile habitat sun lamps to beam some much needed vitamin d into my fucking obese skull while i do the rounds on sites SEP my policy of hell threads is clear , do not disrespect my Feeds SEP us military displays extremely rare princeess diana beanie baby w/ certificate of authenticity in the most devastating show of force to date SEP the Police have stated that rubber neckers and looky loos trying to sneak a peek at the irradiated diaper on 295 will be blasted with poison SEP irradiated diaper on 295 blocking up traffic - 500 car pile up - some one come get this thing SEP if u know what the word "consoles" means. son , you might be a Gamer SEP because i dont know any one in there and they,re all dick heads SEP since about 1000 people asked , the reason i stopped posting my ass wiping logs is becausr the trolls were using that data to terrorize me . SEP - ass kicked in hooters parking lot\n- thinks thunder storms are fake\n- donated 200 Emeralds to the police SEP #ThursdayThoughts is and will forver be the shit version of #TheThursdayNiteRant SEP i have successfully avoided getting a "Charlie Horse " through out my entire adult life . SEP "be the james you want to see in the world " - James Bond SEP Petition To Ban Actomom 93 of 1,999,999 Signatures SEP enjoying my Microsoft SEP the more the merryer bitch SEP "Yow... That aint right" SEP i have decided to become an Oil magnate, after spending quite some time reading the dictionary definition of the word "magnate" SEP the wright brothers would be disapointed in people who would rather get on their cellphones and talk bathroom than discover the cure of aids SEP the way i see it, it seems these days, it seems impossible to have a good Economy, in this economy, as i see it SEP Yes SEP the man him self SEP learning how to say "1 2 3" and "hut hut hut" at army SEP all replys to this will get block-buttoned SEP 9/15/17: 0 "DRY DAY" SEP installing a cyborg tube in my tuxedo which frequently sprays my ass with various advanced powders SEP Make normal car horns "LOUDER"\nMake Fire Engines, Ambulances and Police Cars "LESS LOUD" SEP there are only like 4 girls on this entire site, and theyve all blocked me for saying that snow white and the seven dwarfs are muslim SEP got all these tabs open like "Girl poison husband rate" and "Poisoned husband body count" researching if i should want to have a wife or not SEP this site is fucked SEP my most significant personal cultural advancement in the past 10 years is thhat i no longer think the restaurant "Chili\'s" is any good SEP 9/14/17: 45 SEP my doctor needs me to keep a log of how many times i wiped my ass but i dont have a pen & paper so i have to do it hgere. sorry\n9/13/17: 310 SEP 4.2 TB of VR compatible slo-mo footage featuring a man with no teeth shooting a bra using a dsr precision sniper rifle and pistol wipping it SEP im sorry spider man. please forgive me spider man SEP this is not the real lady gaga... do not engauge SEP to me the most normal career path is to fail at show biz and resort to getting paid by defense contractors to make reddit psots or some shit SEP do not show me Loyce SEP the guys who make steaks should make all of them "grade A" steak,. ythese guys have been making this shit for 1000 years, no more excuses SEP id like uh...medium, w/ pepperoni, sausage and onion. just to piss off the trolls. id like a 2-liter of coke to piss off the trolls as well, SEP its true. i selll my account to a less funny person every year just to rile people up SEP im sorry but, when you people reply to my posts with things like "Fuck you" and "Fuck your Account" it makes me look like a real dumb ass SEP #WENDYSHOAX SEP ill place you in a comma SEP All girls have exactly $100,000 SEP only TRUTH can bring the the Message Troll , the common dumb ass ,to his knees, so that we may bring the blade down upon Him , As is written SEP i will never have, never have thought of, and never will think about, engaging in "Raw Dog" intercourse wih my wife SEP im stupider then dog shit, i dont give a shit, and i dont give a fuck, and i will never shut the fuck up, and i\'ll always Respect my enemys. SEP studying videos on you tube that other people took of me flipping out and thinking of ways i could make my mouth louder some how SEP i hate all of "Groupthink" , except for the groupthought that group thinks that groupthink is bull shit SEP my Piss is busted ... SEP I consider making my posts good a Moral Imperative . I owe it to my follower\'s to deliver them a product completely devoid of Nude imagery . SEP I WANT " 1 2 3 "\n1. MY DICK SUCKED\n2. MY POSTS LIKED\n3. MY ASS KICKED SEP when my friends on here create promo accounts for whatever side projects theyre doing but dont follow me on them..its fine. im relaxed of it SEP doing my favorite " Shit head " activity, kissing a cactus after being fooled nby a mirage SEP the troll wedges the curb between my ass as i lay on my side. "no!" i shout. "im a content producer!!" he stomps my ass cheek, finishing me/ SEP Explain your "Like". SEP just sold 1000 guns to "CONGO" in my most radical act of self care to date SEP they should put slot machines in the mc donalds. i want to win baby SEP wife\'s... you gotta get your man a blue tooth SEP as sure as i am a VETERAN`S SON , i will never move over and let an emergency vehicle pass me , no matter how loud it is SEP Get Your Head In The Game:\nYouTube .com - "Get Your Head In The Game" SEP the trolls have gone too far this time . SEP did i miss something good SEP theyre my jeans SEP my new jeans SEP girls legs 2017. legs getting shot by paintball guns. "Is legs normal." legs on the mind. annihilated by legs SEP when it comes to eating things at restaurants i love the shit that is "Fresco" SEP no. what is wrong with you. christ SEP just admiring my "Pornfree" badge . SEP are you ok. is he hurting yiou (pulls out tiny flashlight ) open your mouth SEP i am above choosing sides here. i hope they either become friends & cancel the match, or beat each other completely to death simultaneously SEP writing fan mail to the police, suggesting some new laws that i think would be good SEP All of you sh it suck ass SEP Keep Colm and Look\nat \nmy posts SEP about 180 seconds SEP always needed a come back for this one ... SEP " pivot to Toilet " SEP looking to "Max Out" my ball\'s SEP MIss the days when i could post something like "Crisp Angel: Birdfreak" and get immedialtey a check for 1 Million dollars SEP i hate it when my dick gets dredged in flour, egg and breadcrumbs, in that order SEP Good SEP my stystem can predict all lottery numbers with 100% accuracy. but not the powerball number. it is too powerful SEP i truly believe that i will usher in a new era of peace and prosperity when i get every single post on hthis fucking website deleted by 2022 SEP becoming Inmortal and laughing . . . SEP broke secret sevrice guy turns his pocket inside out and strangles an assassin with it. opens wallet and unleashes a torrent of moths at him SEP if real life was a tv show. the eclipse would be one of the episodes of it SEP closing my eyes and mentally visuelizing my enemies bodies, in 3d , to analyze them for weak points SEP every one must wear a free speech diaper to protest twitter deleting posts that say "Fuck the ecliopse" and "The eclipse is some fake shit" SEP i love going to video games forums and posting shit like "Please tell me how to like Mario" SEP red onion, green onion, yellow uonion, folks this isnt a food, but a traffic light. Get that like button SEP it is just a nice "Something extra" , that\'s there if you want it. Dont know why the trolling brigade is shitting me off over this one . SEP (screams "Shut The Fuck Up" as loud i can, over and over into a phone for about 4 mins straight) Ah, Cant seem to get good help these days - SEP many people do not realize that after you enjoy a meal out at a restaurant you can pour the entire salt shaker inyo your mouth as a bonus SEP i do not \'Get\' porky pig SEP my favorite feature of this site is absolutely no consequences for my opinions sucking ffucking ass and me being 100% wrong about everything SEP top ten how do you stop trolls jokes\nQ:how do you stop a troll\nA:Get his key board SEP I CAN CONFIRM HERE AND NOW THAT THE USER GOING BY THE NAME OF " OPRAHS_DICK " HAS NO AFFILIATION WITH HARPO PRODUCTIONS— " BLOCK THAT SHIT " SEP I Love say ing shit like, "At the Louvre, Even the BATHROOMS are nice" SEP it saves me so much time , to get my knowledge and opinions of politics from the same guy who sells me eyedrops that make my dick bigger SEP thje teen choice awards blows the kids choice awards out of the fucking water instantly, zero contest #culture #TheArts SEP before you shit on me, lnow this. i have a black belt in shut the fuck up. and - let me finish - i have a college degree in shut the fuck up SEP dont post thjis. its a work in progress SEP pistol whipping my self to gain Endurance SEP taking the great Hot Water Challenge in the sky SEP i get emails. i get emails saying the trolls have won, and that i should bow to them, since i have lost the battle. to this i say FAT-CHANCE SEP i deeply apologize for giving like thirty of my followers panic attacks after posting "Whats for lunch " at 1am EST . SEP darknet 2002: pics of dead guys in bath tubs, warez\ndarknet 2017: discussions amongst the boys as to which of our acquaintances aren t funny SEP im bringing back Lunch... #TheComeBackOfLunch SEP i perceive everyone on this website as a dip shit SEP im sorry every one. the mayor ran out of key to the cities so they had to give me the key to all the girls bathrooms instead SEP shacking my head at peoples crap... SEP thinking abou t having a phase in my mid-50s where i wear a whislte every where i go and make everyone around me call me "Coach" SEP #ConfessYourUnpopularOpinion coats are just big shirts SEP can i use a plunger to unclog my ass hole SEP people will be so pissed off when every AI system independently & consistently determines that the absolute perfect tweet is "Dolezal Rules" SEP Thinking about getting very pissed off on the computer today . SEP they\'re both are. SEP watching hours of people on you tube destroying "Dennis The Menace" logically to max out my SAT scores and live my Best life SEP im sorry for posting that vid of me sitting on the toilet and sneezing like 8 times in a row, and ive ordered my top men to try to delete it SEP (apprehensively tries pouring some orange juice and knocks the glass over like a piece of shit ) ah , they dont make em like they used to... SEP is pregnant part of lbgtq #LGBTBabes SEP picture now, on this Warm Summer\'s Night, if all the "SWEARS" on this page were replaced with helpful links to mazda "Sign and Drive" events SEP al digiorno please stop uyour cowardly efforts to defame this delicious treat SEP i often disagree with DigimonOtis, but his efforts to keep Sharia Law out of the donkey kong 64 wiki are much needed in this wolrd of danger SEP i post at the pleasure of my follower\'s. people can typd shut the fuck up at me and im not going to. i post at the pleasure of my follower\'s SEP "Oh I was just PostShitting for laughs" EXactly. And that is why U forever languish in obscurity while i engage brands U could only dream of SEP the idea of saying "Oh, Absolutely. Absolutely" in the demonius voice every time i bust my load has suddenly become very good to me SEP Asexual VR SEP wish that for one day, for just one day, that i may live in RAT\'S WORLD ... SEP genius hack: keep all of your toilet paper in the car so you have to walk all the way out there to wipe your ass. it \'s "Good Exercise" SEP switch handle to "Gamer Wonk" SEP when will the snake people of washington dc wake up and stop suppressing the release of "Bawitdaba 2" SEP Dont like the posts ? Goto WWW . KILL MY ASS DEAD . COM... SEP smiling to my self... thinking this just might be bat mans biggest adventure yet SEP aahhhh am a gaaaamer of constant sorrow, SEP the time has come for verifed mark SEP Heres my new opinion that my followers will absolutely hate and i will make $5000 from saying on the news . "Piss is a type of shit" SEP i cleaned it SEP dropped a mouthful of spaghetti on my dick just now SEP just occurred to me that i dont have to report to my followers everytime i accidentslly drop food on my dick. my posts should get better now SEP i now hereby declare that all of the guys who reply to my posts are now married to the girls who reply to my posts, and thats that SEP The Moderation and Administrative Staff of the Star Fox Strategy and Technique Discussion Boards DOES NOt encourage its users to crank off, SEP remember folks - you can click on my posts at any time to make them bigger on your screen SEP i love "having my druthers" (??) SEP dont look at my dms SEP as long as i can post from the cage it\'s fine SEP keep your dirty shit of of here SEP my Face when im looking at pictures of other peoples faces on this website that are purportedly reacting to bull shit happening to them SEP once a year on every forum some guy posts a thread called like "Im done with wiping my ass" and all the people who get mad at him are banned SEP MAKE NO MISTAKE》i Appreciate the flawless, invaluable wisdom posted to us by the celebs, and they, in turn, appreciate my valuable feed back SEP thank you SEP i am trying my best to appease the appropriate individuals so that i may become a police officer. please do not mess this up for me, cloud. SEP welchs juicemakers, (pauses a moment to collect self, holding one finger up, audience hanging on my crucial forthcoming words) but for piss, SEP one of the all-time classic flubs SEP getting my pussy hammered like a dumb ass SEP WIFE thinks she can tell her man, when to SHIT!! WELL GUESS WHAT! i will SHIT when I LIKE TO! and if that Pisses her off..DIVORCE HER ASS !! SEP pack it up coward SEP never SEP you will never be less racist than me SEP lying on my back, screaming like a wildman while my trolls graze my balls with a spinning bicycle tire SEP my favorite angle to park my car at is 45 degrees. i call it "The Golden 45" and if you key the shit out of my doors i only become stronger SEP been reckon ive been thinking about heading on up to the big city to (reading note card ) to get my "Ass Clowned" SEP no but it is real SEP Dont see whats so funny about me accidentaly getting a tattoo of a diaper, but by all means, dont let me stop the Circle Jerk. By all means, SEP I WILL NEVER "PIMP" SEP " I DESERVE MY WIFE "\nGET OF MY ASS!! KING OF THE ROAD SEP i know of two types of people⸻people who know bianry, and people who want to morph into a piece of dog shit and get stepped on by a hot lady SEP Serious votes only SEP stinkers or classics. whats good to post SEP im going to start a college called Ass Kick University where i just kick the teens asses when the walk in there... am i RIGHT folks?? SEP i just got logged on to the site and im going to need you all to shut the fuck up for like an hour while i get caught up on my feed here SEP Holy Shit..... SEP worrying a lot about our geopolitical foes recording& transcribing our military comms and its just 900 pages of "Permission To Jack Off Sir" SEP it was my idea to make the avatars circles, i got $1.1 Mil for it , im not sorry and if the trolls dont Stfu i will make more things circles SEP watch this marines Epioc response to being told that he should replace his gun with an enormous lollipop SEP if iyou come on here talking to me about your penis, or saying unreasonable things about my penis, your account will be "Knocked down" SEP when the doctor ask\'s you for a stool sample but you dont know how much he needs so you load up like an entire keg with turds "Just in case" SEP feel like im the only person smart enough to notice how much hourglasses suck compared to normal clocks SEP i detect a trace amount of piss in the public pool, turn purple & foam at the mouth. i scream as the lifeguard injects me with piss antidote SEP pissed off by my nintendo peripherals and other stupid shit rattling around toomuch in my $1600 brief case SEP getting too big from steroids and smoking cigaretts in front of girls, walking around like a dumb ass, waddling like i got a log in my pants SEP thinking aobut turning into a wolf and kicking hurricane sandys ass SEP respecting the Serpent... SEP run um off the road SEP Why are you saying this to me. Who are you SEP i have not forgotten the crimes of "Tweety Bird" SEP (in "not knowing what chickens coming home to roost means" voice) looks like the chickens have come home to roost, SEP DONE WITH people who think that ronald macdonald is a real person SEP someone on here just called me a "Cunk" because my wife wont let me buy a harp SEP i will do any thing for my Sheriff SEP my idiot trolls get ulcers whenever i say my top 10 favorite film quotes to girls SEP Bandwagon Hiptser: Everyone who has normal opinions is a rat\nME(Normal opinions): Youre a dumb ass because youre in a circle jerk against me SEP my ass looks like a fucking frankensteins ass SEP Ive reported this crap SEP when twitter verifies shit like, oscar the grouch from seasme street, instead of my acct, i get so mad that i kick fucking holes in the wall SEP everyone please soend me the money equivalent of whatever your reply is worth instead of putting your words underneath my posts from now on SEP gah. turned a corner too quickly and maimed my nuts SEP Please remove this before my sponsor sees it SEP Just like the damn bomper sticker says -I Will flip my car on top of you and snuff you out if i see you "DAB" , Regardless of race SEP I just read in Forbes, that even Gamers can become millionaire now. I read this is Forbes SEP people who jack off in the bedroom: spiritual, harmonious, Attuned\npeople who jack off in the bathroom: intellectual, mechanical, productive SEP ive decided that "gabagool" is italian for Lunch SEP writing a scathing letter to THE MEDIA for letting me become DUMB as SHIT !! SEP me and the boys pooled together our total life savings of $1789.34 in a last ditch effort to rescue the failing quiznos brand from the brink SEP men guy SEP cowardly SEP Huuuuuuu!!! Lets see those favs... One Two Three SEP mother fucker calling himself Elmer Fudd on the CS server, NEed I remind you that, on the show, Elmer Fudd\'s Kill Count is essentially Zero? SEP banne d from the Laugh Factory after getting on stage and forgetting if husbands like the toilet seat up or down SEP you cant like dms dick head SEP i extend to all my Pregnant Woman followers.... the hand of Unity SEP idid nothing to deserve this SEP nothing will ever be the same again #wikileaks SEP looking for Coins SEP if i get on here and say something like "Readers Digest Sucks Cock" do you think theyll give me a free subscription SEP wow. look at this SEP DUMBASS: SHut the fuck up\nTHE WISE MAN: No you shut the fuck up SEP computer DeleteMyPorno "EraseMyPorno" SEP MIRACLE: world\'s most compassionate man posthumously marries every Woman who has ever died in the line of duty #EidMubarak SEP how the fuck did you manage to post 14.4k tweets to 0 followers SEP thinkinga bout paying a newspaper $1million dollars to run my opinions regarding the Circus SEP my friends and colleagues in the dms are begging me to jack off to balance out my stress levels. but im not jacking off. i will not do it SEP geiting my mother fucking ass Rolled for taking too many pictures of the gym SEP going to the fire station to kick all the firemens asses wearing my fat ass denim overalls SEP unlike normal humans, geniuses do not like bull shit SEP im the only guy who knows how to call out the bull shit of society the smart way. and against all odds i do it for free SEP I lvoe giving thousands of dollars to my real friends while kicking my fake friends asses SEP the secret -- to becoming a content genius -- is that you have to be able to name every font face on the planet while being water boarded SEP havent gotten any sleep since group dm split off into like 3 separate factions because XenoMarcus said metalGearEric\'s chili looks like shit SEP you d o not have to tip the waiter if you say "Thank You" more than 50 times, over the course of the meal SEP revealing the gender of my baby by eating a whole bunch of food dye and taking a huge pink shit in front of my relatives. ah!! its a girl !! SEP it\'s a disgrace. nobody fav this please SEP if i must SEP if i catch anyone being horny on here theyre fucking finished SEP THE BOYS: were watching the mr bean episode where you can see his ass. get over here\nME: cant. wifes making me watch mr beans holiday (2007) SEP downloading some very interesting pictures of DJs SEP do not mouth off on my page SEP laying in the submissive position, letting a gang of trolls piss all over me and saying "Im getting too old for this shit" like a bad ass SEP i lovoe challenging people on here to Duals and beaning them with a sniper rifle while theyre like fucking with their phone, waiting for me SEP best part of being a #Verified is undoubtedly having cops throw flash grenades through the window of anyone who tweets the word "Ass" at you SEP going to start thinking it\'s " Not a good look" to order 1000 island dressing without being able to name the 1000 islands SEP oerdering 40 plates of baby back ribs on a stolen credit card so that i can get enough wet naps to clean my entire body #JustGuyShit #normal SEP (accidentaly fires entire ar15 magazine into my foot & leg with 100% accuracy rate) alright. thats fine. heres what i think happened, [1/82] SEP (trying to apologize for sending dick to 900 girls) you see the phones have a front & back camera. so taking pictures is really complicated, SEP "the account has too many jerk off posts on it" "the account has too many posts about going to the toilet. i cant relate to that" fuck yoyu SEP im thinking a tiny palm-sized toilet you can just keep on your desk & jack off into would soon become as ubiquitous as the personal computer SEP "For years many have wondered what the letters \'DC\' in washington DC stand for. The answer is quite simple: Dollars & CEnts"—Winnie the Pooh SEP FOOL: Election day should be a national holiday\nGOD: No. Elections shault be held on the day of April Fool\'s, to teach WASHINGTONDC a lesson SEP the reviews are in folks SEP I just got word that the trolls are atempting to change the name of the Stratolaunch LEO aircraft to "The Stalwart Pussy." We must stop them SEP me & the boys will be holding hands., forming a Covenant Ring, to protest girls who only want to fuck the main pirate from the pirate movies SEP ellen made me sign some papers and put a big blown up picture of my leathery dick on her show instead of my topical tweet. ellen fooled me SEP i will post one in exactly 10 years. SEP i would like to invest $500 million fucking dollars into this please SEP i see the followers that guys like have and wonder, why can\'t i have followers who are nice ?? why are all of my followers pricks SEP jason born is smarter than steven hawking, combined SEP (dick gets caught in car door which drives away, rips it completely off along with half my torso, intestines spill everywhere) Holy Mackerel SEP (after sendding 500,000 messages to Arbys without getting any favs or replies) i dont care. their commercials arent even that funny any way, SEP be respectful SEP driove 5 hours to rodneygamerfield\'s apartment to sit on his mattress and watch the animatrix while he played on the computer. SEP mindless drones: i will wipe my ass... i will wipe my ass...\nreally brave and handsome guy: no!! i will NOT wipe my ass SEP i regret to inform my followers that the fig leaf i wear on my pud at all times has migrated to my ass hole and is stuck inside of there now SEP get the bars off. expose these fucking privks SEP give him a chance. please SEP absolutely pounding a zip lock bag of cut up hot dogs in the portle potty SEP too many movies about rats SEP i love spending 10000 dollars to make my car loud as shit and suck ass SEP i finally learned how to photoshop the bitter fbeer face onto women after spending 15 years jacking off to the keystone bitter beer face ads SEP no bitch SEP ok. ive been lied to SEP mario means "penis " in japanese SEP i dont deserve it SEP triyng to calculate the precise amount of gunpowder needed to blow up my dick, and only my dick SEP if i find the mother fucker who ruined my daughters lives by changing his wifi name to "the poop bathroom" i`ll have his balls on my mantel SEP (ass sticking out of pants spraying poison everywhere whlie i step towards the podium to apologize to the press) Ah Shit. I forgot my notes, SEP SEX !!!! !!!! ...now that i have you\'re attention, here are some pictures of me and my wife having sex SEP theres been a mistake sir. please un block me SEP imgagine if people went through life trying to collect IQ Points in so as much as they try to collect Dollars. verify me. verify my account SEP getting really into the idea of sleeping on all fours like a dog until my spine becomes super fucked up SEP how can i possibly enjoy a moment\'s respite, when thousads of my followers could be giving my posts "The finger," without me even knowing it SEP please look at this\n what is wrong with u. holy god SEP i am deeply sorry for finding a way to make around minimum wage for the garbage i produce, w hich people only pretend to enjoy to be nice SEP i consider protected, locked accounts, to be the most Powerful accounts... for it is they who have Blocked the entire world SEP james bond: ill fire 1 round and suck your Dick before you hit the floor. ill kick the floors dick off and fuck its ass\nhellboy 2: Game on SEP my new shit: "Burger king = mc donalds"\n\nPlease let me know what you think of my new shit, and provide suggestions on how I can improve it. SEP BITCH !!! SEP another ass kisser of ouctomom = Erase and MOve on SEP if the infamous "OCTO MOM" were to come out of the woodwork and start preaching to us of her thoughts of politics, i would just about SHIT.. SEP (band plays me on stage, wearing tux)\nThe constitution grants me the right to eliminate those I deem disloyal to our nation\n(light laughter) SEP as the man who was personaly tasked with wiping roger ailes ass id just like to say theres no way im more than 40% responsible for his death SEP we here at the teen outreach initiative love to "PULL THE RAT" and "CRUSH A LOAD" like the rest of them. we know how to jack off SEP weve toiled to bring you the greatest specifically tailored user experience of all time. PLease uncheck the box that says "Shut the fuck up" SEP DM-Girls ask why I seem cold. Distant, lately. The reason is This: My rivals obtained 3D models of my dick & are now sending me dildos of it SEP i am wirting the worst fucking book of all time and none of you can stop me SEP to the trolls SEP Donald Fump. Poop fuck SEP some people say, normal peoples brains work in 2-D, while famous authors brains work in 3-D... SEP congrats all. thanks to your tireless efforts, and unrelenting, coordinated aggression, the cheese cake factory now serves, "The Eucharist" SEP when i told u all i had to get my dick surgicly shortened b/c i slept on it wrong and injured it, i opened myself to you, and you Spat on me SEP Show Us Your Dick SEP my problems with "who to follow"\n1.i dont know most of these people well enough to burden them with a follow\n2.it should be \'whom to follow" SEP because theyre both good SEP this guy thinks he calls the shots now just cause he got the check mark ... SEP CNN NEWSWIRE: the guy who voiced the dog in the beggin strips commercials is now "beggin;" the american public to put a stop to jade helm 15 SEP my main issue with "master chief fucks cortana" is if you read the halo novels youd know the space suit automatically jacks master chief off SEP everoynes talking about comey but, get this: i dont even know who he is\n2934 RT 1293 FAVS\ni dont know what nintendo is either\n0 RT 0 FAVS SEP i would not discount pua techniqes just b/c girls are wise to them now. for instance,w. a few modifications i can use them to rear pit bulls SEP currently seeking buyers for "Zonked in the Pecker" thw only sit com where the wife punchs her husband in the dick at least once per episode SEP running multiple red lights while listening to the radio jockeys Flawless "dr. evil" impersonation and scream-laughing SEP if you \'accidentally\' spill an entire 7-11 big gulp on a sears mannequin they will throw it out and you can go have sex with it in the trasg SEP top 10 diapers annihilated by throwing axe Fuck sopa SEP never show me him SEP sensing activiy from one of my known "Black Listed Accounts." do not engage of it, lest you intend to shit on me & everything ive worked for SEP inventing the Vertical Sandwich, that you can eat hands free, like a ffucking dog SEP well i thought it was nice SEP you hacked the poll you stupid fucks. this survey cost me $10000 out of pocket to conduct. you ruined sometyhing beautiful you pricks SEP how likely are you to tell a friend about mcodnalds SEP I Apologize sir. Im a fucking idiot. I will Try to make them good SEP thinking i can help girls bycruising around town selling tampons and pads out of my ford Fusion for cost of product + gas money SEP klout score + IQ = Amount of $ in bank SEP get this off SEP ATHLETE: THERE IS NO HOCKEY WITHOUT "PUCK"\nATHELETE: THERE IS NO FOOTBALL WITHOUT "BALL"\nWISEMAN(SMILING):THERE IS NO WISDOM WITHOUT "BRAIN" SEP guy reading tweets out loud at a gathering: ah, ah, check this out. he just posted, "Leeroy the Jenkins guy"\neveryone else there: Thank you SEP Leeroy the Jenkins guy SEP my "The Banquet of Posts" has now ended. There were so many posts from lots of different people on here, and they were all Winners. Thank yo SEP i propose,on may 5th, we hold what i call the Banquet of Posts. we go all out on that day & do as many posts as we can. The Banquet of Posts SEP remove this at once from my page or illb e forced to citizens arrest you SEP SOup is not lunch. Soup is a condiment SEP #promfail unaware of big wet towel hanging out of ass; whipping around knocking over refreshments as i get agitated in response to Hostility SEP imagine a world where we could all smell our turds while theyre still in our body. capital one whats in your wallet SEP ON LINE........ SEP Re-tweet me pussy SEP the us census has analyzed 100 million diapers and figured out which race has the worst smelling turds ,making live leak comments obsolete SEP thinking i might be able to get the blue check mark if i post a 40 page manifesto and spray piss all over the fresh produce at krogers SEP ah,. so I see you too have an interest in tech, and epic sciencse. Get this, i just read that each bitcoin is now worth, over 100 bitcoins SEP "Every Women" by SegaBoris\nEvery women is a rich tapestery , \nWoven by the lord to be Nice,\nNever Racist, and always\nHave a interesting life SEP 4\' 8" man pile driven by beloved 102-year old crossing guard "Mr. Jim" after making a racket at payless shoes SEP having my Balls exfoliated by a Doctor SEP top complaints im working on:\n- the racism ( of course)\n-posting the same shit over & over for years\n-not posting enough of the classic shit SEP i love iwt when a big thought bubble appears over my head featuring guys pouring entire bottles of barbecue sauce out into a thick pile SEP AUNT: We will miss our Guinea Pig "Charlie" who had to be put down today\nME: NAtural Selection At Work.\nCOUSIN: I will fucking rout your ass SEP my favorite part of the classic 16 tons song is when he threatens to kill me and beat the shit out of me for no reason in the middle of it SEP in retaliation for amazon accidentally charging me for 100,000 prison uniforms i will review each of them with the despised rating of 1 star SEP Flying to Dubai, UAE, to jack off in a hotel room. SEP im not tipping any more waiters until the facts come in, regarding Putin SEP wringing my dick out like a sponge and letting all that gray water drip all over my bluesuede shoes SEP wish that was me SEP Traitors SEP Your aocunt was better when you shut the fuck up you mother fucker SEP check out this little guy if you have never seen him. his name is mickey mouse and you can find him on any computer SEP i post one amazon referral link to osme mens bathing suits that i found very tasteful/practical & you all act like i put a gun to your heads SEP suckng off a wadded up bra in honour of national bra day or what ever. i dont know. who gives a shit SEP Fine SEP Blocking my wife\'s account, at the advice of my therapist, "TekkenChauncey" SEP (flips wallet up in the air and tries to catch it in a cool way but spills its contents all over th e place ( $2)) SEP YOU: jacking off is everything. jacking off is my raison d\'être\nME: jacking off is a zero sum fool\'s game and im clicking x on this chat now SEP every day, send one teen to iraq, and bring one truoop home to experience the hardship of teens life... #AnotherMansShoes SEP thinking back to it.. most slaves, only had to deal with one master. the Modern Content Producer has it far wrose, having to please millions SEP 96 year old man goe\'s back to kindergarten after losing ihs job at the chemical weapons factory due to Gas Prices and the Economy #InspireMe SEP done retweetinh husband accounts. it has become Trite, and Obnoxious to me. SEP Thomas Husband SEP shiting into a tube while earning $4 an hour from home SEP oprahs the secret SEP 2016... NEed I say absolute shitting more? SEP could use a few mmore... been a rough quarter SEP spending time thinking about a fucking disastrous hypothetical penis that has a hole thats wider than the shaft, like a funnel. and frowning SEP its up in your teeth mother fucker SEP Welcolme. SEP paying women to ram me with thier cars SEP now, all trhis talk in the media about me not wiping my ass; i dont know where all this is coming from. if any thing, i wipe my ass too much SEP shut thf fuck up SEP hello. what is your online user handle please? ok. ok thanks. blocked SEP calmly browisng my 100 Sites per day, as recommended by the experts SEP please refrain from writing extraneous stupid shit on the bass drum in any of your future stock images you cock sucker SEP pissed thr fuck off by "Dub step" SEP thats it. thank you for hearing me out. i am a huge fan of the"big mac" and im nice once you get to know me SEP i would suggest studying caricatures from early 1900s racist war propaganda to help your team devise his gruesome appearance SEP it will go without saying that hes an ugly son of a bitch. goblin-like. someone you;d particularly not want shitting on your food SEP your current slogan, "Im Lovin It", will no longer do. i would suggest replacing it with "Look out. Here comes the McShitter" SEP this is money in the bank. put the mcshitter in all of your branding, and enjoy a tenfold increase in likes and re-tweets SEP i know its fucked up. but "shit" is one of the last few apolitical threats. 99% of ppl on both sides of the spectrum dont like it SEP and so me & the boys have invented "the mcshitter". a fictional man who jumps up on tables and shits all over the customers meals SEP they fear Chaos. they fear those who dont simply loot and plunder as the hamburglar does, but those who seek to Destroy. SEP but how do you shake the core of a public fresh off the heel\'s of the 9/11 atrocities. what is it that they fear the most SEP and it is necessary, I believe, to threaten your customers with some sort of villain, to increase the perceived valueof your food SEP all right. so first off we know that the hamburglar has become soft in recent years. the customers no longer fear him SEP i have an a 1 million dollar idea that will pull your failing company directly out of the toilet. hear me out. SEP a Husband said to a Doctor... Write me up a prescription of" Myfuckin".. Indeed, yes. Myfuckin Beer, Myfuckin cofffe,Mmyfuckin slippers, etc SEP ilove the idea of beating the shit out of my Son\'s rival\'s dad at the little league game with a suitcase full of cash SEP a perfectly formed snow ball just came out of my ass SEP if this board was real life id be allowed to embed as many bmp files as I want to. if this board was real life you\'d change your tune quick SEP theyre nice SEP ill yank your earrings straight out you goblin SEP my loyal followers are calling me a "Pussy" because a car kicked up a piece of rebar or something and popped me inthe fucking teeth at 99mph SEP yes trolls. unlike you, i have a brain. its called a " JOB " SEP consider the cornerstone of my beloved acct..the "Follow Back Guarantee." i will follow you back always... no matter how much you suck shit, SEP i rescind my 2009 tweet "bat man fucks joker", as i now understand, through the wisdom of age, that bat man adheres to a noble moral code SEP thank you SEP this shit really hits home for me since i was once forcibly removed from a united airlines flight for having a bee hive stuck on my head SEP please do not say "top notch" to me unless you want to spend hrs explaining what the fuck these notches are & who determines their hierarchy SEP taking up a precious spot in the line for the overcrowded bathroom so i can sneeze into the toilet one single time SEP there are guys who have replied to me hundreds of times and they will get theirs ,very soon SEP theres a magic number of times you can reply to me before a police man automatically destroys you. nobody has ever reached it, but its there SEP how come when s, bannon gets removed from the national secuirty council nobody gives a shit, but when it happens to me everyone kicks my ass SEP forum gods:\n1) the guy who dug a big hole in his basement & posted pictures of the hole\n2) the guy who intentionally gave his wife head lice SEP downloading shit loads of counterfeit papa john coupons through unsecure wifi net works SEP me and my followers would be very pleased to see the national reinstatement of "the cobble stone road." a master piece in engineering SEP when i see people putting up foul language on to the feed, all i can do is laugh, knowing that they will never get their posts read on Ellen SEP more then anything.... SEP these noodles sucked SEP thinking of becoming a "Pipes" dipshit SEP inconspicuously jacking off duringi the board meeting using a series of ropes and pulleys SEP Mr. Ass Health 1998 SEP Mpuh. I could take the time to pick your pathetic posting logic opinions into shreds, but i wont, because i have a life in real life, Thanx, SEP now, bear with me folks. if you want to know why i would post something like "stuffing my fat pussy with sage", simply look at the calendar. SEP stuffing my fat pussy with sage SEP could not find the hospital in time to console my dying grandpa because googlemaps changed all the road names to "Bacon Street" or some shit SEP all credit, for this image, goes to Snooker SEP I despise Flinstone. SEP they got the idea of shocking gay people, into straight, from the episode where fred flintstone gets bonked in the head and becomes a Genius SEP #85Collapse ive been saying from the very beginning that interstate85 fucking sucks ass. now that it collapsed girls are blowing my phone up SEP my fuckin opinion of politics? heres my fuckin opinion of politics. not a single senator in the history of the united states, has been white SEP i have squandered the last of my fathers good will by christening our new boat with the name of "S.S. Mind Of Mencia" SEP the state of owl sfx on you tube fucking sucks ass SEP my promise to all women: my promise to all women is that i will seal theur nudes in a velvet envelope, and wont open it until im 100 yrs old SEP considering referring to my feed ,from now on, as "The Signature Collection," at casual get-togethers, mensa meetings, etc SEP drawing that big boy hair.. therapeutic SEP im the guy at mcdonalds who decides which states the offers are not valid in, an d i get more death threats than god SEP would like to get one post out today without my son taking me to task in the replies ffor letting my ex wife take the car SEP whos the true detective SEP im finished with groupon. it means nothing to me SEP Kurnis SEP i may not know "jack shit" , but i know my friend "Jack fists" and he would like to come to knock the shit out of your teeth, SEP calming down, with magnets SEP just had to click down the 4th post today about our mr. president\'s "thick hooters". lets clear off the bathroom mouth SEP got a big piece of velcro stuck to my big ass SEP you know society is ASS-FUCKED when people spend more time wiritng "Tweets", than bibles SEP saying "augh" out loud every single time I move the phone away from my lap and reveal to my self, my pud, which looks like a coiled turd SEP much of bliged SEP mr buzz feed here folks. just lost my job again, this time by trying to sniff a flower on a mans shirt and getting water squirted in my face SEP damn right he did SEP reported SEP your a child SEP shut the fuck up SEP shut the fyuck up SEP shut the fuck up SEP shut the fuck up SEP shut the fuck up SEP shut the fuck up SEP shut hte fuck up SEP shut the fuck up SEP shut htte fuck up SEP shut the fuck up SEP shut hte fuck up SEP shut the fuck up SEP ,my name is borat for me to poop on and i love riding the short bus to the olive garden where i live SEP bubba burger is short for "bubba hamburger" and the y take pride in serving absolute shit to nobodys SEP harvard geniuses/ scientists love to wind down by going on boards and posting threads named like "What is the screen resolution of a mirror" SEP "booty" is code word for "ass" . this is known SEP Unamused by the portmanteau of "Groupon" SEP geting a wife SEP (emotionlessly) tacos is spanish for "food" SEP i fear my tropical fish no longer respect me after i accidetnally stumbled backwards & smushed my ass hole right up against their $3000 tank SEP im near certain there is a hotly contested tug-of-war between fox executives upon the issue of whether or not homer simpson can show his ass SEP matrix 2: pedaphile killer SEP i would really love to try getting my dick stuck in a pine cone. but i wont due to trolls SEP man at national cemetery tackled down, face shoved into grass until head turned purple for saying "may the 4 be with you" to each dead troop SEP miss when the favs were star shaped, instead of heart shaped. the hearts aare just another filthy product of the horny industrial complex SEP nneed the emoji to be the size of an actual mans head on my screen please. to suspend disbelief SEP (dming the girls) this swebsite is the future. were pioneering... minds\n(dming the boys) this website is sellout. this website is family guy SEP im on a watch list for capitalizing "Balls" SEP bitch SEP visiting New World\'s SEP reasons to invite me to the next "Tweet Up":\n1) if i get unruly i can be easily overpowered\n2) i know which seasons of the simpsons are good SEP (the trolls watch in astonishment as the milk shake they threw at me flawlessly bounces off of my head wwith minimal pain and mess involved) SEP jacking off is Alphamail SEP turning a big dial taht says "Racism" on it and constantly looking back at the audience for approval like a contestant on the price is right SEP inexplicable dip in google hits on my web site "Wayne Tracker," which has provided up to date info on the upcoming Waynes World 3 since 1998 SEP some people get their accounts suspended for cursing out celebs.. i get mine suspended for posting things like "Sports is making a comeback" SEP NO... I DO NOT "PUT OUT " FOR MY GIRL FOLLOWERS... UNLESS YHEY\n1) ARE NICE TO ME\n2) HAVE FAVED AT LEAST 5 POSTS FROM MY "TREASURY" SERIES SEP old screensaver: spinning 3d monolith with my wife on it\nnew screensaver: marquee that says "Truck Month" regardless of what month it is SEP (girl tells me shes sick) aahh that sucks so much. you can come over & have some of my mens one a day vitamins. probably works on girls too, SEP PEOPLE MAG: which pop culture icon are u going to Slaughter next...\nME: I have set my sights on "The Boogie Woogie Bugle Boy of Company B." SEP mesmerized by the branding, of the Wendy\'s Arby\'s Group SEP mmy next big emotional investment is becoming passionately covetous of the bowls of warm tap water that are commonly left out for dogs SEP were at the point now, folks, twhere the CIA will kill you for having Opinions, but refuse to assassinate the nitwits who fuck with my Page. SEP DAD: i just heard on t he news that teens are taking the "Kick My Ass" challenge. please dont do this\nME: you have no power over me, old man SEP (wtaching a video of capt Jack Sparrow shitting on the number 2016 while the camera zooms in and out of his ass hole) Oh this is everything, SEP "Please. The time has come for you to Normalize the repulisve and despicable Digimon Otis." No. I will not normalize that fool ,or his sins. SEP it is so hard folks, to maintain my world famous Post- Racial Outlook, when the damn gas prices refuse to stay down tto a reasonable level, SEP in 2015 user chanegd the world when he deprived himself of using the toilet as part of the #NoPiss challenge. now, hes taking on Turds SEP i lvoe and cherish all of the girls of this site, and other websites. you all become my wife more and more with each passing day. Thank you SEP reading a 900 page book on Dry Rubs and immediately forgetting all of it and just dumping a shit load of cocoa pebbles on my ribs SEP Disrespected at hooters again SEP genius 1.0, is fucked SEP the police cut off my finger for sending my birth mark shaped like the under armor logo to the under armor social media manager unsolicited. SEP -dont click on nudtiy\n-do not respond to nudity\n-wear a loin cloth underneath your clothes in case theyre ripped off by mechanical equipment SEP i am only here to field questions regarding my presidential bid. i will not discuss my ongoing project, tentatively titled "Aids Mario." SEP im george soros bitch SEP Who give\'s a fuck SEP the next time they do a live stream of a rare endangered bird they should let users control one of those old timey horns that goes "AWOUGA " SEP be warned america. 1st they get us fired from amtrak for saying jacking off in the control car is good, next they start poisoning our wendys SEP INTERVIEWER: do you have customer service experience\nME: if I catch a customer shoplifting I will serve him a knock out. I will own his life SEP authorities forced to destroy entire 35,000-ton chernobyl sarcophagus after misunderstood online entrepreneur gets his dick stuck beneath it SEP in the year 3000 historians examine the preserved contents of an ancient time capsule: a piece of cardboard that says "Game cube sucks dick" SEP an angel slips a booklet of my top posts into the pockets of the pope, the master of islam, and b.netanyahu, and the world Rejoices in song SEP massive, hulking gorilla of a man, compeltely covered in hair, lying on a mattress and jacking off to his one immaculate shaved leg SEP (shows up at new media seminar with a chunk of wooden fence stuck around my neck and a bunch of stray animals following me) sorry every one SEP ACCOUNTANT: I Just don\'t know how you can justify donating $700 to "Chips Ahoy"\nME: i hope your car flips & becomes your fucking firey grave SEP i will never define what being racist, to a bastard like you SEP every singe day... my followers ask me. where can i get the latest Kfc DinnerPlan. and the answer is simple my friends. "Mc Donalds" SEP / ! \\ / ! \\ / ! \\ if this post gets 5000 likes, my wife will give me back my inhaler / ! \\ / ! \\ / ! \\ SEP issuing correction on a previous post of mine, regarding the terror group ISIL. you do not, under any circumstances, "gotta hand it to them" SEP (plays some Tchaikovsky records at the highest possible volume) ah it sucks ass. but my IQ is increasing so much SEP leafing thtrough another heap of death threats and served papers that have been 100% tailored to my interests, using Tech SEP man in moving car slaps me in the face with big hand full of dog shit ,flipping me the fuck backwards,landing with full weight upon my neck, SEP my dick is bulb shape, nobody helps me, and whenever my browser needs to be updated i call the police SEP several bernie Sander Bros, in High Levels of govt, have told me they think its good that DJT keeps ivanka feet pics in the nuclear football SEP i hate it when the refferree kicks me in the balls and ass while my opponent has me in a head lock SEP look, im not saying that martin luther king jr was a gamer. that would be ludicrous. im simply saying that if games had existed at the time, SEP I GOT\n - SUCKED OFF -\nAT HISTORIC COLONIAL WILLIAMSBURG SEP fuckyou mother fucker go to hell SEP huge banquet, everyones having a nice time, everything looks extremely normal, except the big banner hanging from the rafters—"Racist Mensa" SEP i love doing the shitty pushups where my knees are touching the ground and counting them as real pushups SEP never say to me, the word "WaWa" SEP hey all . just learned about this new shit here, i think you will like it if you enjoy using the computer SEP please help my cousin "Bruno_THought_Leader" who just had his account suspended for threatening to "Fuck" brexit SEP going t o start saying, "Wife City" whenever i see an attractive woman. e.g... "thats Wife City" or "that girl is Wife City to me" SEP people come up to me and say, "I will never use the bathroom. I will never shit" and i gotta tell them pal, sooner or later youre gonna shit SEP free mustard offered at burger king... genius?? or a "Beta Move" SEP a crass message got on here some how and im trying to debug it. in the meantime please check out SEP what if instead of oil-- the warhawks were all after the enemys piss. like "we gotta take baghdad. we gotta get their piss." just having fun SEP pleased to announce that i will shatter all barriers in 2017 by becoming the first adult gerber baby SEP amusing that i am constantly told those words of "Fuck off" by the girls of here... when i can hook them up with any App that they desire... SEP can any one who knows of Politics tell me if this is good or not SEP COnsuidering becoming one of those jack asses who gets head aches from wi-fi SEP god once said "pit bull" SEP thinking about hopping on some sites tomorrow. havent made a decision yet but i will let you all know. sound off in hte comments below. SEP trying desperately to come up with a name for my new cajun styled recipe that isnt racist and just fucking up constantly in the worst ways SEP MAIN STREAM MEDIA: why do all your jack o lanterns have a hole in the back thats the exact circumference of your dick\nME: no further queston SEP New Wet Ass SEP ((attempts to dress up for hte first time in my life to attend Grandmas funeral but ends up looking like a school shooter from the matrix) SEP once again ive been reported for calling Odie "The dog from Garfield" to make people think i know less about garfield lore than i actually d SEP ask me anything u please, as long as its about my ambitious plan to build a castle in the Jungle for the apes to live in, called "Ape House" SEP the show, "Hee-Haw, " sucks mother fucking ass SEP pig nosed man arrested for trying to whisk an egg using his fingers SEP Jsut arranged an 8-count box of pop tarts to be sent to a girls house. Looking forward to explaining to her how to prepare them SEP CHILD: Papa.. tell me once more about WIFE\'s DUTY\nPAPA: it is WIFE\'s DUTY to protect her husband from villains, always SEP Husband is ATM Machine SEP (ffully immerses self in a picture of sponge bob saying "Dat Boy Tho") SEP mr. 11656 unread emails over here,.. SEP mmy friends... thank you all so much for your generous support... i will now shut the fuck up about this and make with the good shit SEP alright here it is folks. big things are coming... "Let us build the Content of tomorrow" SEP -the drew carey show forums harbor a subforum named "Hell"\n-users are sent there when they absolutely fuck up while talking about drew carey SEP when journalism was good, SEP the trolls think its " SO FUNNY " when they sit on my lap and jostle their hips around until i ejaculate al over their ass. grow the fuck up SEP Damn. the MomTown forums just started requiring 4 point Mom Verificaiton to be able to post there for some reason..anyone got a work around? SEP please stop aksing me in the dms if i have to go to the bathroom. i just went to the bathroom and im fine. SEP goblin: im going to put up a post saying that the fake news is good, and that i like it more than i like the real news\nME: not so fast bitch SEP someobdy on here just sent "the cup of stfu" to isis and all of the mainstream media outlets are refusing to report it SEP things im currently in trouble for accidentally Liking:\n1) a picture of a girl\n2) the Mafia SEP Adorn Your Front Door With A Tasteful Welcome Mat Or Shut Dah Fuck Up SEP trapped, fully nude, in restaurant bathroom. boss & his wife will be here in 10mins. trying to see if i can make a tuxedo out of tolet paper SEP once you achieve the coveted post count of Seven Thousand...Thats when you gain access to the prestigious halls of MENSA. not one post less. SEP the more i think about it, them ore i understand that if i won the Nobel Prize, i would become either a genius, or a millionaire SEP this\'s police. your ass is grass. your tits are toast. your dick is dirt. your balls are busted. your mouth is Mother Fucked. your shit is s SEP (carrrying a huge polkadotted bindle, looking like a dumb ass , shoes completely untied) Mother.. Father... Im leaving home to join the cops SEP 95% of people these days think the bad celebrities are good. like and share this if you miss the days when pople liked. the good celebrities SEP scribbling my exposed dick out of this photo with a blue bic pen so its good enough for linked in SEP between the gun & the blade.. throwing knives are the "Best of both worlds" when it comes to eliminating thousands of home intruders at once SEP Upsetting. SEP two bearded 55 yr old intellectuals, sitting opposite of each other in two stately leather seats. musing upon the concept of a "Paper mario" SEP i had that dream abgain... the one where im at the coliseum, annihilating shitloads of roman gladiators by drifting around in my macktruck SEP all the pictures of bacon on the #nationalbaconday hashtatg look like utter dog shit , these people are out of their mind, uploading these SEP breaking down mentally because im all out of toiolet paper and i cannot decide which wendys coupon to wipe my ass with SEP children.. toddlers.. babies..they all got one thing in common. they all truly believe they can kick my ass. but they are Fundamentally Weak SEP (dismissing waitress handing me the check with a hand wave) no thank you. i dont believe in any of that SEP if one more Fucking girl comes on hhere asking for pics of me or my friends feet i`ll shut down my multi-million dollar corporation for good SEP the human mind... perhaps the most powerful weapon. second only to the "GUN" SEP if I could only get my Nasty mitts on some HARD-WARE , (RAM , Chips, ) my posts would improve tenfould, SEP "Howard Stern should start a pod cast" may be one of the worst things ive ever posted, but still seems unfair to have my tires slashed daily SEP dr oz says due to the sheer volume of milk & cookies santa consumes, you have no hope of poisoning him with piss or cum. wont even notice it SEP dr oz tells me on his show that you can just pour a shit load of mouthwash into your laundry instead of wasting money on various detergent\'s SEP first you got th e 3d tv. now you got the 4k. whats next. 5 SEP cornering a janitor for 50 minutes to tell him how i was once involved in a polyamourious relationship w/ the guy who said "lee roy jenkins" SEP taking my treat plate into the bathroom with me because my followers are a wolf in sheeps cltohes SEP my fatass head floating in the sky, looking down at all the Girls i follow bantering/ having a nice time on here, nodding, thinking its good SEP im going to be one of thsoe guys who writes ebooks named like "Brain God: Calculation Master" then spend all day screaming at people on here SEP the bird bath institute considers any stone bowl between the size of 8 to 40in. to be a bird bath and they are sick of people disputing this SEP i will not build a single snow man... until i respect , all of the real men, first SEP Maybe the phones get smart enough.. They will do the yapping, for us ! SEP GeniusTalk - dog food has been putting subliminal messages in theire food to make dogs think they taste good - TruthVisions SEP people named fucking "Curtis" need to get a grip, and start calling themselves "Curt" which is a rteal name SEP derekgamer SEP " NO BULL SHIT" is not just a phrase i like to say, it is also a way of live SEP if you have ever retweetted me without it equaling endorsing me , i will shatter your smart ass little turd stained laptop against my legs SEP my ass looks like a Stooge\'s ass SEP conversation ,ended SEP i dont like dumb asses either SEP from now on. i am calling everyone who is a dumb ass. "Anti- Intelligeance" SEP ive mastered "Draogns Path," ive not taken a shit in over 20yrs,& im willing to have my ass hole inspected by a notary public, to prove this SEP eating 1/2 lb of beef boulougnase and getting roid rage from it SEP reasons the famous statue "The Thinker" is better than selfys & cell phones:\n- It is a classic\n- It is for geniuses to look at\n- It costs $0 SEP fellas... you know i dont ask for much... but my fake US embassy in Ghana just got shut down and i dont know if i can make rent next month, SEP top 3 Engagements\n1. faved by Charles Martinet.. voice of Mario\n2. direct message from the official Lunchables account\n3. the one to my wife SEP extremely frail man, tasked with gathering hundreds of dildos thrown onto the football field by overzealous fans— booed incessantly; Reviled SEP DOCTOR: you have the balls of an 80 year old man. your dick is mostly normal. your pubes suck. I didn\'t look at any other parts of you\nME: h SEP would like to issue a correction ,regarding my comments of Japanese toilets. they do spray water on your ass, but they do not suck you off . SEP i cannot sit idly by while my followers get shit on by the terminator SEP FELLA\'S... WHEN YOURE WIPING YOUR WIFES ASS... YOU MUST ALWAYS, ALWAYS USE "TOILET PAPER" SEP everyone thinks youre a celeb when all your cars windows are tinted but people only get those so they can jack off on the go SEP go to jail dick wolf SEP i do not give a shit of the official WHOTUS stance, i refuse to hear it, i will never forgive the turkey, i will not bow to that filthy bird SEP some one explain please to me why the letter board at my local arbys has said "happy hour" for months now, before i get the police involved SEP ive been known to look at 2, even 3 emails , at the same damn time SEP reality tv show where we replace one lucky boy\'s pc gaming chair with a fully functioning toilet. every episode SEP everyone loves it when i go to their parties and mix all the whips together (cool wip, reddi wip, miracle whip etc) like a fucking shit head SEP i will never learn science SEP 696969696969 SEP surprised that nobody here had ever used the phrase "pissed on execution style" unttil i described my poor customer experience at hhgregg SEP ░░░░▄▀░░░░░░░░▐░▄▄▀\n░░▄▀░░░▐░░░░░█▄▀░▐\n░░█░░░▐░░░░░░░░▄░█\n░░░█▄░░▀▄░░░░▄▀▐░█\n░░░█▐▀▀▀U▀▀▀▀░░▐░█\n░░▐█▐▄░░O░░░░░░▐░█▄▄\n░░░▀▀░░░U░░░░░░▐▄▄▄▀ SEP 0% and 100% are the same tnhing SEP if you ask me this election could end about 100 different ways:\n1) trump gets 0% of the vote\n2) trump gets 1% of the vote\n3) trump gets 2% o SEP the worst part of having an ass is always, having to wipe the damn thing. the best part of having an ass is shitting. #ElectionFinalThoughts SEP it is so beautiful to me, to have my ass lovingly wiped by my girl friend, knowing nothing is more pure than this bond, Nothing more strong, SEP because 759 people like it SEP here are this year\'s Vote Multiplers for election day. no, they do not stack\npoliceman - 10x\narmy man -12x\nverified acct - 15x\nAsexual - 18x SEP blue jean\'s... Activated . SEP accosted by several of my followers last night.. would nnot fuck off, awful, screeching voices..overpowering urine smell. Terrible. Terrible SEP in base ball theres only points and players. i will be Shut Down for typing this. SEP FETID BOZO: Ahhh oil spills are bad\nWISE ADULT: the sun will evaporate the oil, & the wheel of mother gaia spins goodly, As does all things, SEP how do i add " GUNS " to my posts ........ SEP ironing my suspender straps and treating them with powders... in the privacy of my study...making the nit wits and losers absoltuley furious SEP i got lock jaw from eating pasta out of a dogbowl and my wife will be here in 2 hours to marry me. help me github SEP handing print outs of my most beloved arliss (arli$$) quotes to trick or treaters SEP (playing russian roullette and its my turn)\nhasta the vista mother fucker\n(shoots the other guy SEP i think that in 2013 digimon otis was seirously convinced that they were going to change the name of gamestop to gameMosque SEP when somone posts a vile piece of home decor in the group dm but you have to bite your lip because youre on the lowest sub-tier... SEP when you click on the tweet and it says "Whoops! Something went wrong" thats how you know its good SEP i believe that while i was Resting, Aeris_Nader, the snake that he is, dropped a pinch of baking soda into my ass crack and poisoned me SEP im an adult, and i deserve to listen to the verison of the super bowl shuffle where thw word "Ass" is not censored by the referee `s whistle SEP " []D [] []\\/[] []D " <<<< thats how you type the word pinp SEP thank you normand SEP people do not appreciate the grace and dexterity that is required to shave the fat pink rolls on the back of my head that looj like hotdogs SEP unfollow , unsubscribe, block and mute all Gambler\'s SEP it is tragic that my followers refuise to obey my direct orders , and that i am often told to get "Ass-Fucked" when i ask for pieces of food SEP i will never support pears again after the tree on my street constantly dropped nasty pears that got run over by cars SEP strawberry SEP let me show you how its done . SEP if you turn the patterns on their shirts 90 degrees... the trusted REFEREE becomes the despicable PRISONER.... truly life is a fragile Bitch SEP you gotta check out my posts SEP no thank you. congrats on the new gaming rig. SEP is wiki leaks hacking twitter agian or are the people leaving numb skull comments on my page actual human beings SEP palm thrust my entire head through the fucking wall and kick my big ass while im trapped like a stuck hog SEP BOSS: i need you to go around to all the other employees and collect their piss in this thermos\nME: Yes Sir! I will not fail you, your honor SEP there is NOTHING wrong with having 1 Million Doallrs\n\nyou are NOT defined by your one million dollars...\n\nhaving 1 Million Dollars is normal SEP IVE ALWAYS SAID IT !! \nthe people we see of today are somewhat more known to care more of their Face Book Status, than their Brain Status . SEP A tag has been placed on Utz Quality Foods, Inc. requesting that it be speedily deleted from Wikipedia. SEP i accept that all the things i post "For Fun" are to be met with physical violence, including elbows to the face, shattered knee caps, etc, SEP your fingernails, not your dick. i have no opinion of your dick. SEP clean yours bitch SEP i do not find it unreasonable , during my scheduled Cleaning, to ask my dentist to wash my dick as well, since my dick is basically a tooth, SEP ive never met any of them, but i know that there are guys out there who name their dogs shit like "Rover " and "Fido" SEP BREATHTAKING: clever husband sells all of his sons war medals on ebay as punishment for exceeding family plan data caps SEP this tweet sucks bigtime SEP Im the guy who exclusively wipes his ass with the disposable seat covers SEP my followers love to Drool & Shit like a bunch of dirty daugs; and they would see me damned to Hell if i cut off their precious content flow SEP "theyre called millennials because thier souls are 1000 years old...." - truthGamer SEP i can not catch a break folks. my 78 yr old son has been pissing into the boiler some how and making our home smell like a reptile enclosure SEP fucking a stack of emoji t-shirts at target or kmart or wherever the hell SEP post "I love the mcdonalds Five for Five plan" if you support Don. post "Mcdonalds five for five is Bumpin" if you support Hillary J Clinton SEP check out the new "Five For Five" offer at mc donalds... thats Five soda\'s for five bucks "Or your money back" SEP for every bra yo u dont wear i will wear 3 Bras #NoBraDay SEP "DISRESPECTFUL !! DISRESPECTFUL !!" the crowds shriek, upon learning that the scene of bat man wiping his ass & sucking his own dick is Cut, SEP (wearing one of those fucking stupid hats with the word "Press" on it) mr president! do you think DC Films should show bat man taking a shit SEP COMPUTER ... SHOW ME MORE " KEN BONE " SHIT SEP "Ive been studying to become a Pharmacist"\nThats good. Im living in one of those crane game enclosures now. Sometimes the claw jacks me off, SEP please dont goon expose me SEP told to "Sit my ass down" after wasting my one question at the town hall meeting by asking if the secret service agents get to see them nude SEP waushington running amok... #JustMyThoughtsOfIt SEP (everyone in dm notices ive been trying to type something for 10min straight) sorry all. iwas just writing down a girls phone number in here SEP were at the point now, that when i offer to impregnate my girl followers, people assume my motives are sexual. disgusting, grow the fuck up, SEP Thoroughly Unimpressed. SEP Get rid of this SEP i dont like this one either, remove it SEP take this one down too SEP take this down SEP i feel, as I, over time, become even more of a Dumb Ass, i am able to consume web-based content and Media at increasingly Blistering speeds, SEP getting fucked up new reports that both of the vp candidates were washed and scrubbed in the same big bathtub, minutes before the debate SEP 5000 Year Old Turds Found In Ancient Diaper Revealed By Scientists To Belong To Man With Small Penis, Shapely Hips SEP i am a natural showman. i love to show off my natural\'s SEP i WILL wise the fuck up. i WILL super charge my content for 2017. i WILL get blue check mark SEP (genuflects as two golden lights come forth from behind me, taking the form of majestic angel wings) i would never hold a seleb at gun point SEP meat loaf just ordered the venue to keep the lights on the audience so he can see if any trolls have infiltrated his show SEP too much truth in such little time. feeling the heat cominh down to silence me... signing off........ for now SEP the famous time-tested classic, the philly cheesesteak, has become Sexualized by greed SEP it is sio, so easy to Mindhack the government and get permission to dig holes in your yard SEP mind of a lion.. heart of a Pregnant woman SEP this webpage is so courrupt.... SEP pushing one of those home depot mobile staircases onto its side., getting that shit wedged between the aisles, because they dont sell Geodes SEP sickening SEP my boy\'s... SEP COP: found the culprits blog..another 1 of them Incels\nDETECTIVE: the only "Cell" he\'ll be "In" is a cold lunchbox next too mammas meatballs SEP ME: there is a new type of beer called "Wine"\nshirtless guy witht 104 followers: Shut the fuck up\nME: Yes sir SEP the weak shall wither and die...(JACKS IN TO TREELOOT .COM CIRCA 1999 VIA THE INTERNET ARCHIVES AND CLICKS ON THE FUCKING TREE 100000 TIMES) SEP vineger contains so much energy.. thats why moms call it, "Free Money" SEP damn. some one told me the first day of autumn was a solstice so i didnt jack off during it. now my sinuses are all fucked up due to T level SEP yea i torched the dennys. and i woudlve gotten away with it, if i werent the only guy in town with a custom jersey that says "My Wife" on it SEP but not Good enough for the follow ?? Hm? SEP when you do sutuff like... shoot my jaw clean off of my face with a sniper rifle, it mostly reflects poorly on your self SEP whos been leaking my dm box . SEP you give me dry ice & i dont know what to do with the shit. "is this mother fucker really posting about dry ice" yes. wet ice is good though SEP these are the same steroids that cops use... and you can now order them online for the very first time SEP the ass ratings are in.. my ass needs to be given the old " HEAVE-HO " on the fast track otu of here and thats the facts jack. Boo to my ass SEP using the toilet when i hear Our national anthem start to play. i do what i must. i stand tall in complete agony; as shit runs down my leg, SEP LET US SPEAK NOT OF THE YOGI BEAR , WHOSE MANNEURISMS, GAIT, AND DEMEANOR , RESEMBLE THOSE OF THE DISREPUTABLE JEWEL MERCHANT "BLOOD DANCER" SEP im done SEP this is called doxing now, and its a form of crime SEP reseurch SEP did they get it off line yet. did they take off the pic of tweetie bird with a humans ass SEP holding up hte line at Aldi with a barricade of shopping carts, desparately trying to contact the ex-wife to ask if im allowed to eat Pectin SEP absolutely. SEP me and the boys have decided that the least gay way of wiping your ass is to dump a quarter bottle of Palmolive Spring Sensations back there SEP the way i see it, people who come on here and submit content that is not up to par, could possibly be considered the "Villains" of this site SEP the entire contents of the kfc smokehouse angus chicken snacker slide out and fall directly into my shirt. "IM FUCKED" i yell out SEP (spends all of 7 seconds skimming some blog posts) yep. just as i knew all along. having pnuamonia is good SEP (takes off VR goggles after howling in fetal position for 3hrs while guys in varsity jackets slap the teeth out of my mouth) wow its so good SEP who does this guy think he is. SEP (insufferably) It\'s pronounced. "Bloomin Onion." The \'g\' is silent. SEP angel-voiced 5\'2" man forbidden by mayor from performing at this years christmas pageant— "described as upsetting" "this tradition must end" SEP if your tweet doesnt grab my attention in the first 9 or 10 characters it can just fuck off SEP ah.. the perfect Souffle! cant wait to dig in to t(*EVERY PIPE IN MY HOUSE EXPLODES AT THE SAME TIME, COVERING ME IN SHIT AND BOILING WATER* SEP never brought this up due to Trolls, but my son is set to graduate from ITT tech next semester after 8 years of hard work and im very proud. SEP the fool tries to make one million dollars.... but the wise man knows that its much easier to make $0.000001 dollars one trillion times SEP bet yoyu think youd never find a mother fucker like me at a primarily Black church. but i like to go,.. just to Smile.. bask in the Energy.. SEP " snorting a line of coke up my big ass " SEP have you ever seen a chunk of fools gold. its a very alluring substance SEP boy oh boy do i love purchasing large amounnts of Fool\'s Gold. wait a minute... fools gold fucking sucks. this stuff is no good..!! Fuck !!! SEP get this down off the computer. SEP (me dming) i am merely a vessel through which the posts flow. i accept no rewards.. for i have no name, and no face. Do u like wearing bras, SEP feel as thoguh our nation, our world, is closer than ever, to Christ, with KFC\'s recent announcement that they are to turn birds into wine., SEP it may seem that cops are all fucking dumb, bad at IQ tests, etc, but they only pretend to be, to lull crooks into a false sense of security SEP friday night gathering up together a big pile of things i like to respect (flags, crucifixes ,etc) and just roll around in it ,give kisses, SEP but more than a snack SEP i got like a whole page of arbys coupons... no big deal SEP looks like a "whos Who\' of my dreadful follower list SEP all good boys keep a jar of sulfuric acid at their station to punish themselves for sending horny dms or goig offbrand.. just a drop will do SEP KFC is making BIRDS and LUNCH\n10954 patrons\n$545060 a month SEP this is insane. whyh arent the news outlets running this SEP (to guy who is filming video of me on his phone while i am siphoning fountain soda through a horrible device) fuck yoyu stop taking pictures SEP im so sorry you had to go through that.... i apologize on behalf of all guys who dump huge bags of turds and piss off of overpasses SEP new mcdonalds-flavored burger king sandiwch given the coveted score of "Eight" by food experts SEP frowning while the entire waitstaff of California pizza kitchen sings "happy birthday" to me, looking like a lump of shit in a neckbrace SEP kelly bluebook is my gf SEP "Wrong" SEP i would simply much like to know where i can purchase a nice cloth to place my miniature guitars upon. please do not send me the frog pic. SEP shutting computer down until the shitty moods & attitudes can fuck off., if you need me ill be on my other computer, sititng 60° to my right SEP u got 1 side saying dogs have paws & the other side saying dogs have hooves..then me, the guy who cuts thru the BS, saying they have Niether SEP Q: Would you describe your Brand as more "Uday" or "Qusay" hussein?\nA: Qusay, without a doubt. Qusay. SEP stay out of this. i have them on the ropes. do not interfere SEP hey your trays dont fit in the fuckin trash cans. i am a CFO in real life and an oversight like this would cost me my Nuts . SEP when you\'re sitting on the toilet theres a tiny opening between the seat and your dick/nut area. this is known as "The Daredevil\'s Spittoon" SEP ok which one of the trolls told some company in Singapore that im interested in bulk purchases of cheap laminate flooring. i demand answers. SEP i maintain that curly is by far the most malignant stooge. without his toxic influence, moe & larry couldve ascended to unfathomable heights SEP Fine. I\'ll shut the fuck up now. SEP one of the things you realize when becoming a genius in many aspects of life is that the world wide web. and the computer, is the same thing SEP NO SEP jusut dropped 8000000 HKD on a usb-interfaced sniper rifle that blocks one of my insolent followers at random every time i pull the trigger SEP please check out my devastating one-man takedown of the thanksgiving day parade, which was given a PG rating by the MPAA due to " sarcasm". SEP hello 911. the toilet seat ripped my loin cloth off again SEP am i correct in assuming that everyone is happy about prisons not being private anymore because now we get to see the inmates dick and asses SEP this shit sucks get rid of it SEP a man from botswana is threatening to ddos a picture of my ass if i do not post a list of my favorite pasta shapes by 6am. i will not relent SEP 1st grade: Mastered.\n2nd Grade: MAstered.\n3rd Grade: Mastered.\n4th Grade: Heres when they start trying to trick you\n5th Grade:This ones hard SEP does anyone else remember when the owner of forgot to switch to his personal acct before @-ing pictures of his turds to a doctor SEP in 2017 i will make a concerted effort to become a ringling brother. SEP this is the Essence SEP 19:00 hours. im whereing a condom right now. temperature: 74°F. air pressure:1012hPa. just had a phenomenal potato salad. Wind Direction: NE SEP im afraid you do not grasp the enormity of who it is you are dealing with. (removes diaper,. revealing two sub-diapers ) Shall we continue.. SEP WAITER..ive made it quite clear U are not to speak to me until im ready to select the Spice Level of my braised quail dumplings..now BEGONNE SEP #MillennialSoapOperas " DUMB ASES " SEP hm? U want me to stop posting about the latest deals at Boscovs? well i wish bugs would stop biting my dick..but " PAL IT AINT HAPPENEN\' ! " SEP im not obligated to respond to thits shit. SEP jokes on you , my followers peak hours are 2-4am because theyre all unemployed and depressed SEP boys night SEP stop this. At once. we are supposed to be lifting the voices of our fellow content creators. Not shiting on them. SEP because i work hard for it....... SEP (in really quiet, barely audible voice) hope your dick falls of bitch SEP i will respect the wishes of th e mayor and the townsfolk by not fucking the pumpkin patch and ruining the harvest, only if i am given $100. SEP a good commercial idea would be a cop who pulls a guy over ansd steals the out back steak house gift card from his wallet while checking id SEP Thw common law wife is giving me "Side Eye", for accidentally eating some of the poison they left out for the stray dogs in karachi SEP it is really quite astonishing that I have yet to win The Lottery, given how good I am at selecting six numbers and saying them out loud SEP they are going to build it soon. SEP sick of guys like jared and storm roof getting themselves beat up in prison just so they can snag a trending topic on twitter SEP they are going to build a moscque on the wtc. #SelfieForSeb SEP thinking of life\'s i could have led in other worlds..... SEP ME: please show me the posts in the order that they were made\nCOMPUTER: thats too hard. heres some tweets i think are good. Do you like this SEP "if theres a spicy brown mustard, why not a spicy brown ketchup?"\nThe wise man smiled.\n"my friend, the condiment you seek is Barbecue Sauce" SEP visions of God SEP becoming a cop so I can access the police computer and scrutinize the Walmart receipts of my rivals digimon Otis and warez_lad SEP scrolling through the timeline, not comprehending a single thing, but smiling and nodding slightly when i see the word "Favs" or "Retweet" SEP im actually glad you leaked this. now the Dialogue can begin. SEP let\'s all be my wife SEP #NationalGirlfriendDay please cherish your gal\'s.. in honor of us, the single Boys who must sacrifice all companionship to #CarryTheBrand... SEP the james bond 007 ez board will not let me change my user handle to WHITE_LIFTER, even though it contains no swears. i am in crisis mode SEP YES...i have the healthiest Gum Line as verified by the Department of Records\nNO...i will not chew food for you\nNO...you may NOT kick my ass SEP for every year that He is not featured in Forbes Magazine as the worlds richest man... GOD will sink one of our battle ships SEP i do enjoy spending my weekends "Joining the Army". oh how i hate when monday rolls around & i must say goodbye to all of my soldier friends SEP incredibly handsome , charismatic famous boy credited with ending income inequality after saying that slumlords should be called "dumblords" SEP ME: Are these Vine Ripe\nWAITER: Yes\nME: Is this Farm Fresh\nWAITER: Yes\nME: Are these "MAde To Order"\nWAITER: No\nME: I will notify the police SEP somebody please Bribe me SEP I do oft in times flush my waste as soon as possible. I have no desire to look at it. I would rather be reading expensive novels to my wife. SEP so long suckers! i rev up my motorcylce and create a huge cloud of smoke. when the cloud dissipates im lying completely dead on the pavement SEP just as Christ washed the feet of his disciples , i proudly volunteer to allow my girl followers to use my shirt as a napkin,. SEP Fuck off, "Deft Beck" SEP It\'s become apparent that this is a measured attack . SEP does it not save a total of 12 keystrokes, which are widely regarded to be considered to be known as the "Typist\'s Syllable" ? SEP i will write it someday my friend. thank you SEP horny does\'nt exist SEP everybody wants to be the guy to write the tweet that solves racism once and for all because it would look good as hell on a resume SEP the first part, of most of them SEP i cannot condone taking my previous tweet and using it to say that the "ass wiping hack" is me. i regret putting myself in such severe peril SEP im the guy who talks about ass wiping hacks so often that i commonly use the abbreviation AWH and get mad when people ask what it stands for SEP boycot SEP (sending image of delicious meal i stole from a group dm to a girl) yeah i ate this SEP Cowardice: A Tale In Four Parts SEP Greetings. Today I would like to discuss "Porky Pig" SEP - Incest Prank Goes Wrong\n- Why Thousands Of Geniuses Are Ditching Their Aquariums\n- Can Plants Make You Smarter?\n- Moms Can Get Tattoos Now SEP my IQ has increased 10 points ever since i stopped tollerating people mucking about, on the time line SEP how about we worry about human rights ... after we\'ve fixed all the human wrongs ? #AnHonestMansSay SEP me N\' the boys eating messy sandiwches, sneaking around with big binoculars looking for girls & letting every one know who runs this TJ maxx SEP what this site needs is the apollo theater "Sand Man" to push all the " MORONS " off stage. I will take this down if it is considered Racial SEP I Am Not Afraid To Shut Off My $300 Asus Monitor From "New Egg .com" Off If The Intelligence Of This Site Reaches To The Level Of Stupitity. SEP i would love to brutally kick the ass off of anyone who tries to be nice to me or be my friend on here SEP ME: Im far more excited to see what the "Cloud" has to offer, than what the "Clown" has to offer.\nMY NEMESIS: How dare you tell the truth. SEP "we live in an exciting age because you can just go get downloads of anything. almost every day there is new downloads to get." - OwedSex96 SEP i truly hate winning the infamous "Darwin Award" by getting bombarded with artillery fire in the Super K-Mart parking lot SEP girls always love to telling people not to" Mansplain"\nbut they do not care of, "Man\'s Pain" SEP wailing at th e blooper reel, saying all the things hte actors are doing wrong out loud, punching the shit out of an usher, pop corn flying, SEP ive beenn using Confidence and Self Esteem lately, to get unprecedented deals on discarded promotional displays at game stop SEP ive hired 3 of my clumsiest dumb ass followers to spy on my wife and uncover her plots against me, just the worst bumbling fucking imbeciles SEP (sees a cop shoot somone) This is just like james bond (sees a war happen) This is like robo cop (sees a burning house) This is like top gun SEP my agent says if i get my balls neutered off ill be able to calm down & improve my posts. but i keep telling him, my posts wil never be good SEP no more belly Vids SEP some times, it would seem to me, that some of the people who use "smart phones", are ANY THING BUT !!! #OhButUGottaLaugh SEP folks keep asking, me, what are Q-TIps for. if theyre not for ears. well the answer is simple. theyre for wiping certain areas of your dick, SEP sick of bieng fucking shrieked at in DMs just because im one of the few left who thinks girls should not breastfeed while operating aircraft SEP tak9ng your shirt off in the pool...shit move SEP my name is "Pruce" now. tell every one you know that my name is now pruce SEP the mummys curse mother fucker SEP Whos that SEP (responding to a troll after increasing my intelligence to Max Level with a carefully optimized content stream) I suppose u think youre God, SEP you threaten to go to the bathroom on me? i do not think you have the gall to go to the bathroom on me SEP hopping on some tech support forums to accuse people with minor hardware issues of being Mad SEP never do dunks on me or own me again SEP beginning to despise my friends and loved ones for pushing valuable branded content off of my feed as I struggle to comprehend this world SEP i will never stop feeding thte trolls SEP well im glad theyve downgraded me to "basically" a nazi instead of "literally" a nazi SEP people are still apparently very upset with me for cancelling "the thursday nite rant" feature... let it go folks.. SEP million dollar idea: Dog door that is big enough for humans\nBillion dollar idea: Dog door that says "Hello" when something passes through it SEP Waiter! Oh Waiter! Yes, I`d like to know if I have earned any CashBack Reward`s™ with the purchase of my farm fresh miniature cucumber plate SEP a booklet labeled "Mra Shit" falls out of my pocket during my daily buffallo wild wings j/o, sealing my fate and costing me the Yoplait deal SEP my agent told me to say ive done a lot of soul searching & have decided that keebler is the treat of the summer SEP helping the police by yanking the doors off all the public bathroom stalls SEP im also a gamer with ring worm SEP trying to heal..... please donate to my go fund me... $10 will make me less racist... $100 will make me extremely less racist...thank you... SEP i will never "honk if im horny" . SEP just thought off an idea i believe to be bad ass. lets find the address of the leader of isis, and mail him/ her pieces of our SHIT SEP its not Fucking funny SEP I insist that Moe is the 1st Stooge, Larry the 2nd Stooge, and Curly is the 3rd Stooge. Some will say the order isnt important. Theyre wrong SEP Please help me . You cowards SEP wife sentenced to 4yrs for defrauding a charitable organization..U know what that means (pulls worst gaming consoles to exist out of closet) SEP your one SEP i stopped watching all the tv shows my followers think are bad, unfollowed all the Goof accounts, and yet twitter still sends thugs after me SEP "History will show that Brexit was the correct choice, for the future of Great Britain. I also do not believe in sex." - The_Brexit_Asexual SEP i\'ll say !! SEP i refuse to consume any product that has been created by, or is claimed to have been created by, the (((Keebler Elves))) SEP indoor plumbing is a ludicrous fantasy SEP going to start asking "What do you Think?" at the end of each post, to help stimulate discourse and reap the substantial benefits of Social. SEP someitmes it seems to me that some people woulr rather join KKK, than join mensa.... SEP awfully bold of you to retweet my "bad year" tweet on a year that has been extremely good thus far SEP Just got word that thheyre going to do jade helm 15 again, to punish us for letting the celebs run amok. It \'s fucked up but we deserve it. SEP going to start deleting posts, due to harassment. as in, i want more of it. hbring it on egg heads SEP no!! this is fucked! SEP been completely ruined due to iron deficiency and Arrogance. had to scrap the project and start from scratch. Looking for investors SEP Rather tiresome that people wiould rather Threadshit my mentions than say, enjoy a whimsical boating tour through the fair canals of Venice. SEP polease cut all art programs so we can instead focus on teaching our children the importance of being Respectful towards influencers SEP amazing to me that people are still complaining about my genius sons being too loud, in 2016, of all years SEP "duhh thank you cj my boyfriend muah muah muauh (repulsive kissing noises))" SEP 1) i do not owe you mother fuckers a damn thing\n2) i will not hear any more questions or comments unless they pertain to MetroPCS, or Pepsi. SEP - Always retweet promoted tweets.\n- Always surreneder your username and password to Girls\n- Always Wait 1hr before replying a Verified Acct. SEP Your "I Love TD Bank" Car Decal Fucking Sucks SEP Are you unquestionably committed to the "Customer First" experience—Do you pledge here and now to bow to the customer\'s every whim? SEP STOP THE POST STREAM. PULL THE PLUG ON IT. END THIS MADNESS. GET THESE DAMN POSTS OFF MY TIME LINR "LOUSY!!" "WE DON\'T WANT EM!!" SEP i posted on here earlier about how ihad a leather belt wrapped around my nuts and not a single person asked if i was ok. Fuck you SEP worst food of 2016 : Bread\nWhere to begin. Bread is a piece of shit and its no wonder its commonly associated with the worst drink, "Water". SEP Look again at the post. I did indeed sign it, with a \'D\' for dril, after referring to you as a Frau. (german woman) Checkmate. SEP *Fraud SEP CONTEMPTUOUS NIGHTMARE: (blowing farts w/ mouth)\nME: Sir! I demand your opinion regarding Organized Gender\'s influence on corn prices. SIR!! SEP BLATHERING SHITE: the Dems VP Pick should be subway;s own Jared\nME: That man is in jail. Have you done any research prior to this discussion SEP no SEP in the planning stages, for a new feature of my account which i have tentatively titled " The Three Posts. " more info coming soon of this. SEP -go about my day seeking energy in my life as a Bieng of intelligence\n-if your sperm count is complete dog shit, i will not even talk to you SEP Trite. SEP none of them were good. Sorry SEP folks.. reply to this message with your Finest tweet, and i just might drop it a Like... my way of "Giving back" to the community... Thank u SEP Cant wait to catch all the exclusive trailers and live events at #GamerGate in Los Angeles this week. Looks to be the best gamer gate yet SEP ouh yes!! THe boys have spoken, and they want more! More jokes about the ape! My one man show , entitled "Not-So-Great Ape" will explore th SEP forwarded to Admin . SEP Un-Tag me U fucking degenerate cobs of dog shit. You dirt beneath my heel SEP handing Faves over to my enemies is FRAUD !! base, contemptible FRAUD! SEP never own me SEP this is shameful SEP to everyone who thinksn im some sort of dip shit regarding video of me eating a pocket pussy, please rest assured i hated every moment of it SEP unloading an entire belt of ammo at me with a minigun or some such device will now get you "Blocked" SEP t o the guy who told me they took the ape to the hospital and cured him, Fuck You. SEP A MERE Musing From A Troubled Husband, Strengthened Through Time: "Let the birds have their bird seed, and unto us boys, the Beer seed" SEP was a tad dismayed to find a Rat Brain in my favorite KFC Snacker Meal, B ut the friendly cashier assured me it was merely Intestinal Matter SEP the other day a trolling Shit sent me the message, "Googoo Gaagaa ". Twitter has indeed threatened to close my account if i dont retweet him SEP For your Friday Enjoyment; A "Shit List" of folks I\'ve banned from my Radio Shack: Monica Louinsky, The Honey Boo Boo, Octo Mom, & "Snooki". SEP I TELL YA IT NEVER FAILS !! WENT TO GET MY MAIL AND A HIPSTER HIT ME WITH THE STRONGEST STREAM OF URINE I EVER SAW ! KNOCKED ME ON MY DUFF ! SEP examining the Ape Case: perhaps many are mirthful of its death as apes are akin to Golems & Vampires, cinematic villains of the classic era, SEP INTERVIEWER: we looked you up. you dont even have a twitter account, which is good\nME: Actually i was suspended for posting "Gumby shit ass" SEP im the guy who gets really upset about people not putting their real names on here. im also mad at State Farm Insurance for not being a farm SEP stunning: mindful adult , decked out in complete set of riot gear - takes out entire stampede of horses using wisdom and tactic\'s SEP my entire face turns purple as i try to enjoy my cup of monday coffee while all my coworkers rush into my office to watch me fail once again SEP oh u think this is funny mother fucker?(Kills ape) YOu consider this comedy? (kills naother ape) and my Missing Plane jokes are bad? Yeah ok SEP back in the dog house after the wife caught me photo shopping her into vintage car ads SEP kneading my dick and nuts like a wad of dough on a bench at pay less shoe store. i do not appear to be enjoying myself. im frowning actually SEP i help every body, im not racist, i keep myself nice, and when i ask for a single re-tweet in return i am told to fuck off, fuck myself, etc SEP let;s be inclusive SEP "ah boo hoo hoo i want to post Foul comments to content leaders" Fat Chance, Dimwit. I will annihilate you under bulwark of the Law and God. SEP Coward-Centric Platform twitter, removing user handles from character limit, giving the repliers more ammunition with which to shit on me, SEP Downlioading 6 Terabytes Of Info On Deal\'s SEP 1989: the fall of the berlin wall is celebrated, historically revered\n2016: i tear down the sneeze guard at old country buffet and get Booed SEP the girls on this site constantly beg me to show them a picture of the clothes i wear while posting. this is them. SEP just doing some nude sunbathing in this gender neutral target restroom. i hope i dont get my dick sucked SEP Watch it. SEP You need at least $100 to join Boys Lunch Club. I will count all of the money in your wallet, so do not try to join if you do not have $100. SEP Just met w/ Boys Lunch Club. Seems to me, That we are very pissed off that teen girls would rather kiss, "Soldier Boy," than Actual Soldiers SEP online is where i go to get my A B C\'s... Abused By Cretins SEP checked my inbox for 2 seconds & immediately saw a genital. could not parse which type of genital it was before tossing my phone out the car SEP Risto\'s Whiff . SEP cheers and thank you SEP jacking off SEP taken to task by the ryhthm bastard SEP we had 2 cuts of ribeye, a salt shaker half full of salt, a quart of wine, and a whjole galaxy of multi-colored bibs, napkins, SEP Removing the battery from my phone until the time line becomes less toxic. SEP can anyone tell me if this is good or not. if this sort of thing is frowned upon i will stop immediately SEP presented with out comment . SEP did you just rob a bank by threatening to open a bottle of diarrhea SEP Q: If your post was proven by a counsil of wise men to be racist, or bullshit, would you bar it from the record?\nA: I do not delete my posts SEP i do not delete my posts. deleting my posts would be akin to razing Abraham Lincolns famous log cabin, just because the trolls are mad at it SEP THEY MOST CERTAINLY, ARE NOT ! SEP theres no space in the title you shit mouthts. it\'s one word, it\'s always been one word, it will forever be "Topgun." i will not delete this SEP ive heard from a reliable source that people arre putting their lips on to my girl friends avatars and going "muah muah muah." cut it out SEP peppercorn ranch & buttermilk ranch... one of these is good, the other is completely Fucked, and its not my responsibility to tell you which SEP i wont say more of this. but a couple of the big accounts on here have been souporting swearing culture, by posting swears to the time line. SEP eating a single Dorito on a bed of Jasmine Rice SEP my greatest sin is that I\'ve utterly betrayed my "NO FEAR" tower decal by being embarrassingly frightened of birds and butter flies SEP youre all a Dog of the Coward\'s order. ill take you across my knee and slap yopur Ass., i will "GIVE UM HELL" as ordred by the great general SEP images leaked of WildArmsGarret , trusted consigliere of DigimonOtis, taking a bath in one of those old fashioned metal wash tubs SEP (steps out onto the podium for the annual delivery of his Most Hated "State of the Arbys" address) the state of the Arby\'s... is strong... SEP my being a shit head can be traced back to boys school, when i was expelled for using the headmaster\'s computer to search ebay for " LUNCH " SEP will not be making any new posts until the 5G Network has been officially rolled out. 4g doesn\'t cut it anymore. fail to see the point . SEP (sniffing a crumpled up one dollar bill i found on the floor of a dog kennel) ah.. thats greenbacks baby SEP ST PETER: on march 14 2024 you posted simply the words "james earl bond". hope the 34 favs were worth it idiot\nME: They were bitch SEP spending my entire police shift downloading apps where you smear simulated dog shit all ovefr the screen and becoming completely a dumb ass SEP id like a few words with this prick SEP photo\'s shop SEP PRIEST: in the name of the father...\nME: Yes. Good\nPRIEST: ...the son..\nME: Great. Go on. keep em comin\nPRIEST: ..and the Holy Spirit\nME: No SEP wife hall of Fame SEP damn it to piss. my wife replaced all of my anti-wife reading materials with Pro-Wife bullshit SEP i` ve long supported the classic "One Tooth" rule, which states that every time you make a bad post you should have one of your teeth pulled SEP Every Time I read a new Tweet on my time line. My IQ increases by One Point. SEP im just about to say that if you come in to the kfc support forum w/ a name like "crisp_Kyle" you can go right ahead & click that logout tab SEP when MetalGearEric told his 36 followers i have "A Poor Man\'s Micropenis" and none of my so called allies stepped in to defend my honuor.... SEP LOVELY GIRL FOLLOWER: hey.. i noticed you posted 3 barbed remarks about game stop in a row.. is everything ok?\nME: NO, everything is NOT ok, SEP some times.. the smartest people you know, are Geniuses SEP tiodays FunQuote: "Dont forget the WiFi" #FunQuote SEP i am developing a ground brekaing new app called "MOneyWallet", where you earn "Money Points" by mailing cash to my house SEP whose idea was to call it "Ice cream parlor" and not "Scoop Kitchen" ?? lets get this joke viral and show my ex-wife landlord whos boss SEP weeping because of my heroic burden... spending my last dollae at dairy queen to support girl businesses... chowing down between the tears.. SEP please bring your rats to the new castle flea market so I may bless/heal them. ill be sitting in a lawn chair wearing a stolen priest outfit SEP thats why they named the restaurant that SEP i am a classically tragic dumb ass hwo has the burger king logo imprinted in my brain like a baby bird to its mother SEP you;ve fucked up now SEP despite everything, i am still looking forward to the release of the sequel, "jungle 3 jungle," which was delayed to 2038 because of trolls. SEP i did not say that the kid from jungle 2 jungle should be sent to Guantanamo bay, i just said it wouldn\'t be racist if he was SEP if i catch you taking " SELFIE " at my used car dealership ( BEST deals in the tri-state area) i will shell you from the rear like a coward SEP my work day consists of my bosses trying to goad me into my cubicle so that i\'ll just sit in there & jack off isntead of ruining the company SEP the thing i accidentally posted earlier about putting my used condoms in the dishwasher was a virus. my subsequent meltdown was also a virus SEP GEN X\'ER: Help im shitting on my pants\nME: They have this invention called "toilet" now. Maybe if you hang up the cell phone yould know this SEP people pay good money to stamp your mail. if you refuse to take the time to thoroughly digest every piece of mail you receive, you are a Cur SEP Tjhis guy fucking sucks SEP putting the vacuum on my dick until I stop hearing crumbs go down the tube SEP when people ask me who my favorite comedian is.. i invoke that wacked weatherman "AL GURE" and get one million dollars worth of retweets SEP the $100000 pyramid is actually fairly fucking cheap for a pyramid SEP we need less mayors and more sayers (of truth ) SEP id like to muse upon a scenario i came up with just now. a DUMB ASS visits a restaurant, after reading a poor review of it in the newspaper SEP dropping some more Asexual Nudes into the cloud, to show the girls and the trolls how clean my body is, from years of washing SEP YES, my dick is shaped like an extremely small snail\'s shell\nNO, you may NOT suck it, SEP had mny scholarship revoked because of my bumbling 15 tweet routine about how isis attacked the airport because they hate brussel sprouts SEP All music made past the year 1969 is rap. (sseals self in rebuttal proof chamber for 100 years) SEP Was Going To Send Ur ScreenPlay To Mr Scorcese Until I Found Out U Were Part Of The Failshit Brigade Who Mocked My Seashell Necklace In 2010 SEP i lvove falling off the guard tower SEP really hoping that someday my wife will surprise me by sending me a picture of my own dick SEP im one of the friday night lights, from the title SEP ME: COMPUTER... SORT THE POSTS ON THIS SITE FROM LEAST TO MOST RACIST\nCOMPUTER: YES MASTER\nME: COMPUTER... PLEASE DO NOT CALL ME THAT SEP that house is clearly on the grid. it sucks SEP fuck the grid SEP gonna fill up on milk shakes and do some open carry off the grid SEP (browsing the secret arbys menu that only boys can look at) ah., lets see, ill take one Spicy Onion Concerto with a dollop of SmartCorn™ SEP first you have democrats and rtepublicans. theyre basically the same thing. then you have green party and uh, the whigs. theyre the same too SEP helping the waitstaff by wiping the table down with the same disgusting napkin that I just used to sop up all the bullshit off my face SEP user named " beavis_sinatra " has been terrorizing me since 2004, by sending me pictures of cups that are too close to the edge of the table SEP Sovereign Citizens Getting Owned Compilation SEP this is photo shop SEP (poking head up from self suck) augh this tastes like dog shit (goes back for more) SEP im a marine & accomplished scholar. my sons were alchemized into helicopter fuel to serve their armed brothers. how dare u post penis to me. SEP my sources tell me that people are allowed to say the word "ass" on HBO. can anyone confirm this SEP Quick Thinking: Area Man Saves Own Life By Making A Bra Out Of Two Diapers SEP Leut me make this clear: gloves are Next-Gen mittens , mittens are trash, i will never wear a mitten, i will take down anyone whos mad at me SEP guy walking around flaunting his mittens around. claiming that nothings better than mittens. i show him my gloves and he flips the fuck out SEP im being evicted from my home for saying that kfc should sell hamburgers on a public log, and being a general "Dumb Ass" when it comes to IQ SEP #truth #fact... it is proven that about 80% of people online are violent murderers. wow thats so many. be safe my beloved followers SEP Leave him alone. SEP if any of you have me blocked please dont SEP "tarzan of the apes" will never become a Turner Classic Movie. shoddy premise. people find pictures of a man yelling in the woods disgusting SEP tarzan is garbage. he sucks more than anything. people need to stop encouraging his shit by making films of him. go home tarzan. fuck tarzan SEP pleased to announce that i am pissed off due to Stress,. and the Block All Girls initiative is now officially underway. SEP glorious crime spree after being fired from wal mart., expertly hopping fences, chugging all the seeds out of my neighbors bird feeders, SEP this is uttlery disgraceful SEP Former U.S. first lady Nancy Reagan (R) joined by daughter Patti Davis at the premiere of the film "Stuart Little 2" SEP i tell you folks this damn itunes is something that you cant figure out unless you are a nasa guy SEP FULLY PREPARED TO TAKE A HIT IN THE OLD FOLLOWER COUNT TO BECOME AN ALL CAPS, ALL BOND ACCOUNT. LIVE THE DREAM. PURGE THOSE BOZOS SEP THEY SAY A NEW BOND ACTOR IS CHOSEN OUT OF RESPECT EVERY TIME THE REAL LIFE JAMES BOND DIES, AND HELL, FROM WHERE IM SITTING IT CHECKS OUT SEP NETWORKING IN HOME MARKETS SUCCESS SEMINAR HOSTED BY JAMES BOND HIMSELF? OH YEAH. IM IN. BUT IM GOING TO NEED YOU TO DRIVE ME THERE SEP AS J. BOND HOLDS IN HIS POSSESSION THE FAMOUS "LISCSENSE TO KILL," I MYSELF HAVE LICSENSE TO TOUCH AS MANY GRAPES AS I PLEASE W/O BUYING ANY SEP im mashing the mute block and report buttons all at once with my big red palms SEP delete this smartass SEP please read my longform treatise "The Arrogance Of Burger King" available only on my new $70/month content streaming platform "ShitWire Pro\' SEP i couldnt help but notcie you besmirching my nephews Banksy Valhalla, Jordian Computer, Holstein Paypal, and last but not lease, paper mario SEP " the bitch of bluejeans" SEP -racist,\n-unsanitary condittions (animal near food)\n- fake holiday\n-ill eviscerate this pic further at a later time. SEP stealing valor by purchasing fraudulent military gear from etsy,. parading my insane loadouts in front of our vets as they hurl abuse at me, SEP He thinks it\'s Cute to come into my mentions and lord his "Hollywood Elite" blood capital over me and my boys SEP the trolls are also in full bloom as well i see , SEP cant wait to hurl them at my foes SEP imagnie a world where us Common folk are given the blue checkmark and the CELEBs are left out to dry!! Hows that feel, HUh?! Answer me punks SEP #SaySomethingGoodAboutTwitter you can easily remove it from your screen by clicking the x SEP (me in prone position while having my house swatted again) officer if u could please just slip the rest of that campbells chunky in my mouth SEP crapping fuck... 900 pictures of guns that you absolutely Must see SEP it was always my idea to fill all the fire engnies with shit and piss to save water. the mayor stole it and planted a bomb in my car SEP looking for some open comment sections in marine corps training vids to post racist shit on SEP aangry bird\'s.. a Corrupted brand. keep far away SEP before i drop 20.99 on these bad boys..can anyone tell me if im at risk of being murdered by the nsa if i wear these SEP Im online at the computer, ready to post pitures of my new sandwich, and ive got a hankering for my ass to get kicked SEP if it werent for the sport of hockey, nobody would give a shit about pucks SEP Q: Whats ur least favorite finger to be flipped off with\nA: the middle one. it pisses me off way more than the other fingers. drives me nuts SEP get me on some ghostboster sites SEP huaw yeah you gotta try this shit... just boil the macaroni in the same pot as the spaghetti ... this is called the famous "Double pasta" SEP attn Waiters: giving me one of the free pens from TD Bank ruins the experience of signing my check. it is a slap in the face. A death threat SEP U Have Forced Me To Take Extreme Measures To Protect My Business And My Lifestyle. I Now Refuse To Open A Single Email Until April The 12th. SEP while youre all bowing to the Pig Industrial Complex on false holiday #NationalPigDay,. i will be observing pictures of the noble bull moose SEP #NationalPigDay no. this is crap . the pig will never have his day. i demand that the "Pig" surrenders this filthy assault on our calendars. SEP i can confirm today... that dilfers a Dud SEP vision\'s... SEP sorry to all crooks, hucksters, cronies, and phonies... but in this, our year of 2016, police man is sitll king, and the jail, his Kingdom ! SEP listen fuck wit. if you dont want me pissng all down the floor and the walls of your public restroom then make the urinals. bigger SEP i propose a Bussiness offer of the boy who says"Damn daniel".. i should like for him to grace the company of me & my wife, for twelve jewels SEP sorry couldnt hear ya over $ rustling about in my wallet. money i saved by subverting toothbrushes. sucking the toothpaste tube like a cock, SEP THRIEE SIMPLE RULES FOR SPEAKING TO ME OF MY AFFAIRS REGARDING MY INTERACTIONS WITH MY LAWYER\'S... STAND DOWN !! GET IN LINE !! FUCK OFF !! SEP we all know the famous "Five Second Rule"... if you dont throw dropped food in the trash within five seconds it unleashes toxic spores SEP ill never rinse my farm fresh vegetables. its the responsibility of the greengrocer to rinse my God damn food and if i get poisoned so be it SEP never SEP stumbling through war torn syria with my pants down, begging everyone around me not to feed the trolls SEP the first step to becoming a Millionaire is to acquire one hundred dollars SEP people who like to say "Ba ba ba ba " at me <<<< People who hand me their wallet SEP a boss should be allowed to kick his employees asse\'s. key to his workers house so he can just come in and start wailing anytime #bottomword SEP no questions at this time SEP 20 treats = 1 snack\n3 snacks = 1 meal\n3 meals = Boys Daily Intake\n180 Treats = Boys Daily Intake\n1 Treat = 1 Goody\n60 Goody\'s = 1 meal SEP im going to get shit on a lot for posting this but i dont care SEP this is the most vile thing to be put on tv SEP paper is a liquid #TheThursdayMorningRamble SEP someone please. ive bitten into a nasty apple and I don\'t know how to spit things out of my mouth. ivr never spit before and i need help SEP givign my social security number to the valentines day app to find out which idiot wants to see my dick the most SEP for all you twitter birds out there.. a fun idea ive been throwin around: lets make the front page to "WILD WEST" theme..Huh! only on Friday SEP barby dolls are worthless to me SEP in 2020 police technology will allow criminals to choose between "hot jail" and "cold jail" SEP good to have Options SEP why even bother learning how to hack when i can just have my enemies accounts removed by accusing them of conspiring to piss on grumpy cat SEP death SEP if i saw someon e on the street wearing a dunce cap, i would challenge him to my famous Three Trials of wisdom, and soundly defeat him SEP let me be very clear: i would rather attend a Pig\'s wedding than attempt to sift through the dumpster you people have made out of my dm box, SEP ELLEN: But what you\'re most known for is your use of the infamous N-Word\nENTICED AUDIENCE: Wooo !!\nME: ahh!! ya got me! SEP IN OUR LIFETIMES... "GOODBYE" TO MOUTH WASH SEP i hope you all enjoyed my latest Sets (posts) SEP i will not let anyone touch my pitbuls unless they are wearing a collared shirt SEP thhere is no such thing as charisma, and art is fake. the only metrics by which we must determine the worth of a man are Strength and Wisdom SEP the pursuit of having trhe nicest opinions online... is the only thing that separates us from the god damn animals. the sole reason we exist SEP i think he belongs in the paddy wagon with the rest of the looney tunes SEP Closing my account until all of the pro jet-dry kiddies go to bed. You people are animals. Hopeless brutes SEP scenario: the duishwasher mouth starts up in some dumb ass baby voice. "GIMME SUM JET DRY!!" i unload my .480 ruger into it without Emotion, SEP i just thoughgt about those commercials with the stupid fucking mouth in the dishwasher that begs for jet dry & ripped a door off its hinges SEP id like to report a hacker. he offered me 1000000 to show my dick and didnt cough up the dough when i delivered the goods. i got hacked SEP i shooed a young trans person away from my garbage with a broom SEP MYTH: my posts are for the Pauper\nREALITY: my posts are for the Prince SEP the prophecy fulfilled\n\n\n SEP he blocked me because of this one. SEP dont do this stag mack SEP Puerto Rican Pisser SEP you soudn like a nerd SEP wow , another bernie bro coming after me just because im posting the truth into their shitty little lives. you Lose bitch SEP I mdade $400000 just by typing the words "Simpson and garfunkel" back in 2011 and u have the gall to @ me w/ ur little 200 ass follower acct SEP please dm my agent if you wish to Banter with me in the mentions, so he can send you the proper paperwork. im extremely tired of this shit. SEP U cant even get a good "Shoe Shine" anymore—the guy just keeps trying to put his mouth on my dick. Is this a Thing now. Is this a Problem SEP someone please get me in touch with the little boy who died & went to heaven. i want to astral project him into my ex-wifes castle for intel SEP i enjoy a bit of "Humour" every now and then, but people seriously need to sotp tying me to a chair and injecting me with unknown substances SEP (looking into a big toilet filled with shit , piss and toilet paper, shaking my head) this is fucking stupid. hardly worth my time SEP shut the fuck up and kick my ass SEP GET THE FUCK OFF OF HERE SEP Hurr dee durr . SEP RAT CHECK... unfollow me ,if youre a sleazy low down RAT!!!!!!!! i will knock your block off, I respect honor, Truth in words and action. SEP Fuck you mother fucker SEP an Oscar category for super bowl ads in the future?? perhaps in a less judge mental world, SEP take ntoe Hollywood: these superbowl ads teach us we can create compelling visual content better than any movie, WITHOUT resort to Vulgarity SEP fuckin Wade SEP "i wish they got, WiFi down here" - guy who died in the paris catacombs SEP -windows covered in trash bags\n-arbitrarily sorting the contents of my snack Pack\n-pumping racist apps into my nokia at Lightspeed\n-frowning SEP sometimes it seems to me that it is a bit good to say that we could not do our posts without using none other than the humble computer chip. SEP taking the lords name in vein... #inspire SEP looks like im forced to address false rumors that i own 3 dildos on a shelf labelled "breakfast" "lunch" & "dinner". this is an absurdity . SEP ME: mr cruise..im also a celeb. i invented the phrase "Barney sucks"\nTOM: wow... that phrase is so good, i must use it at least once per day SEP they say zika virus is the Bastard of 2016, but that distinction must go to my infamous folowers, who i consider to be "Dumber than Dogshit" SEP donald trump is the best man for the job... and for that he has earned my vote. however, i believe he needs to "Check his priviledge" SEP 1) wise the fuck up,\n2) put the same amount of days in all the months\n3)people need to put on the damn thinking caps\n4) im boycotting months SEP While your were busy all discussing the black celebrity\'s ass, i just constructed an authentic Christian abacus using fine tumbled stones SEP got one of th ose steering wheels you control with your mouth so i can dual wield on the road. top secret technology for friends of police, SEP girlsl... i shall virtuously employ the expansive breadth of my tech wisdom to protect you all from Daesh... even if you dont follow me... SEP has any one ever noticed that the good spiderman movies are the ones for adults, and the bad spiderman movies are the ones for children SEP please make a Nude one SEP THINKING ABOUT WHEN DID "IN GOD WE TRUST" BECOME " WOULD YOU LIKE FRIES WITH THAT" SEP my favorite tv show characters are "The good guys". My least favorite characters are "The villains" SEP (Becomes upset by an unsolicited mention of Beetle Bailey on twitter feed, and punishes followers by refusing to post an update for 30mins.) SEP i shant say more of it . SEP ah.. why is it that computers can send hateful commentary thorugh the modem... but weren\'t designed to send something nice.. like a Song SEP the big seat of my sweat pants sagging beneath the weight of globs of neosporin as i waddlle my fuckface ass off to the impound lot SEP Fucking yes this . Friendlys has a meatball bar SEP im the boss of Mensa. every time i close my eyes i have visions of going berserk and spitting on a human face until it is unrecognizasble SEP i spend a lot of time reading the constatution of the united states of america while grinning ear to ear SEP will try to become less of an Ape on the day of holy sabbath SEP just read something fucked up... Not a single picture of stonehenge exists. SEP first day i got online on a man named Mumbai_Eddie accused me of having diarrhea, so i detached my modem and put it in the sink for 8 years SEP sick of seeing "Snark" on my feed regarding our nation\'s presidential candidates. i will be voting for all of them because they seem nice SEP Looking to the day when the World Wide Web matures to become into the World Wise Web. SEP im known to "Trick or Treat" from my neighbors mail boxes. they love it and it drives them wild. And it`s a bit of fun SEP i dont know who all these fucked up people are!! im sorry! im so sorry!! SEP its real SEP #ToTheGirls2016 im intelligent & clean boy. i have the trigger dicispline of a lion. ive used Torture to cure myself of all mental illness. SEP Discussing\nReality\nIntelligently\nLife SEP U have to listen to this song "Signs" by the five man electrical band... the guy is just owning the fuck out of all these signs, it\'s insane SEP more harmful to our web than any computer virus... sick thought\'s and selfish attitude... pass it on boys... SEP thats disgusting SEP this account is the Curse of my life SEP which 46% of you mother fuckers arent buying soap SEP my most famous tweet, entitled "Jacking off at the Dog Kennel," has earned over ten billion engagements & was retweeted by stephen spielberg SEP today i will be making a bowl of "Home Made" guacamole, with, you guessed it, chips. SEP get one of those bill gates tubes that turns piss to water, load a big fat backpack with treats, cut the cord, pull the plug, fuck the grid, SEP got about 50000 posts to catch up on here... thats so many.. thank you my sweet boys SEP martin luther king did not have a favorite type of lunchables. absolutely ridiculous and inappropriate. please delete SEP we odnt post the word "you" anymore in 2016. SEP heated debate SEP rt if you think that "Coors Light Cold Hard Facts" is the "Chevy Clubhouse" of "Dilfer\'s Dimes" SEP Shut the fuck up SEP its not that number anymore. you may re tweet it now. SEP "Green lettuce" SEP fuck it, ill just come out and say that i think "Iceberg lettuce" is just aobut the worst name you can come up w/ for a damn type of lettuce SEP im not horny but, lets face the facts people... if youre a girl im gonna click on ya SEP twiitter dot com baby... the inmates are running the damn asylum.. AND IT THINK THAT IT IS GOOD...!! #StartupIndia SEP entertaining twisted thoughts of putting bull shit on the back burner SEP enjoying some fucked up thoughts of some boys enjoying the real counter culture shit... such as drinking coffee, and being glad it\'s friday SEP draculas politics are actually really good to me you scum bag SEP FUCK OFF SEP excuse me sir, i couldnt help but notice that youre in need of a thorough explanation of kegel exercise. ok, it\'s basically psychic jelqing, SEP youll never shut me the fuck up , no matter how many times you unfollow me, you will never shut me the fuck upon here!! get lost Cyber scum! SEP im a monk in real life, the matrix is real and hummingbirds and other really fast animals are proof positive that bullet time eixists SEP i hold this truth , im just an average joe trying to do my messages here, and i dont have time for fellas who want to take a big crap on me. SEP steven wrong SEP i have a phd in advanced chemicals., but Thanks. SEP none of you are educated in anything, youre all pricks, your dms suck, yoyure terrible at trying to engage my brand like normal human beings SEP "horny" has killed more people than all the volcanos on earth combined SEP i will soon be leaking a list of the people who sent me really concerned DMs when i posted that jacking off too much makes your dick smaller SEP if you say the words "Room temperature" to me ill flip my lid. room temp varies depending on the room. youre talking shit out of your mouth. SEP going to have to unfollow you, for arresting me SEP MOST HATED FOODS., 50) PAPA JOHNS ORIGINAL FAMOUS CHEMTRAIL PANZEROTTI 49) THE DEMERITORIOUS DOLLAR NINETY NINE McDIAPER....... MORE TO COME SEP its actually so good, SEP argh.. (shakes fist) Damn you White people !! ha ha, but seriously though, most whites are actually highly intelligent, and resourceful, SEP this post is 2 years old. ive since lost custody of my children and my wife left me. still wild about candles SEP while you were watching the teen choice awards, i was watching the classic episodes of the teen choice awards from back when they were good. SEP sensing some deep-seated resentment over here, SEP life is aobut too many chairs. you got the tv chair, dinner table chair, the dentists chair, electric chair... thats too many. Tone it down SEP ah, aint it funny that folks these days are washing childrens mouths out with soap.. when they should be washing their mouths out with Hope, SEP up until I was about 17 i believed that bugs were baby rats SEP Beer is the drink of summer. But it can be enjoyed during the other seasons, in moderation. SEP respect me.. respect my #Setup SEP you\'ve ruined my life. Thank you SEP i cant. its an illusion SEP looking at my own dick in 3d SEP dont @ me SEP grow up,.. SEP Im going to shut the computer off until people learn to be more mature about life. In tge mean time, suck my dick SEP pal the only "meltdown" im having is my ice cream melting down into my hand while I lay on the beach & laugh while thinking about the trolls SEP i don\'t have time ot actually read you peoples posts, but ive been evaluating your engagement metric\'s and they look like Shit... SEP Some crap is simply to be put into the dumpster . SEP its no secret that i sometimes have to scold my hare brained followers rirght in their goofy fucking faces to keep them in line SEP slin jim SEP DOCTOR: you cant keep doing this to yourself. being The Last True Good Boy online will destroy you. you must stop posting with honor\nME: No, SEP my alerts are already hell. this is the pain we must endure SEP Dont postshit me. SEP im going to put my boots on you SEP COMPUTER.. FED EX ME A PRINT OUT OF ALL MY GIRL FOLLOWERS SORTED BY THEIR DEVOTION TO CHRIST\nCOMPUTER... GET ME THE BULE CHECK MARK A.S.A.P. SEP the best part of winning the power ball lottery has got to be getting my hands on some of that Green stuff also known as money. SEP i fear that if the 10k character limit is enacted my trolls will post ascii middle fingers that are elaborate & beautiful enough to kill me SEP it\'s pronounced "yoh-gert" SEP if you want to make someone on this website really mad, accuse them of poisoning the animals they care for #workseveryDamntime #TheMaster SEP me and SnakeMom1956 are in love and we are laughing at all of th e people who think that our flintstones themed wedding is a sham SEP i would never photo shop anything, espiecally when it comes to damn fucked up things like racism. this is a serious account SEP shame on dailymail & nydailynews for posting my racist ball screenshot without giving credit\n\n SEP accidentally brought my piss detector into the mens room again and cowered beneath a sink as the deafening screech echoed off the hard tile SEP pathetic of you to back stab me for clicks. SEP dont know why they deleted this SEP youre fit for 2015 #yourFitOf2015 SEP that smug prick baby new year th e piece of shit. ill throw him from my truck the dumb ass mother fucker SEP Numerous hospitals no longer make a Baby New Year public due to concerns that the infant will become a target for criminals.[13] SEP is it this SEP bi g fan of his work. loved casino and good fellas SEP in another life...\ni would make U stay.. SEP hitler SEP i found a basin. its you SEP i piss into my hands and carry it until i can find a basin SEP sometimes its good to just wipe your ass, SEP Bllesed SEP turning my headlights off when driving at night,.. so that my Rivals cannot see me SEP anguished imbecile pukes up a surprisingly intact mcgriddle while planting an IED in front of best buy SEP Pldease just fav me if you enjoyed the tweet. \nI dont have the time to read the replies SEP the mayor threatens to replace one letter of the english language with the Swastika for each week that his wooden leg is not returned to him SEP FOOL: Beer is not the tdrink of summer. It can be enjoyed all year round\nME: Beer is the drink of summer. SEP i have spent the last 9 yrs writing countless papers on the subject of Followback Culture. The quality of my life has suffered immeasurably. SEP i will die for my belief that Beer is "The drink of summer" SEP mystical truth Teller SEP all my vines are me SEP just spent the last 10 minutes fishing a pubic hair out of the toilet to avoid any nasty phone calls from the boys at the sewage plant SEP wife put me in the dog house agauin for failing to get the blue checkmark... and people ask me why im mgtow pua... SEP im here to tell you that even with 8 kid,s, 6 dogs, debilitating rickets & a filthy waterlogged home, that its still possible to be a Gamer SEP i apologize sir !!!!!!! SEP this website seems more & more like a place where elitist daddys boys can show off how \'CLEVER" they are, instead of a source for bra advice SEP i think your jaw should be knocked into the river SEP mother teresa Aint No Saint, put the green arrows,there, click the heart too SEP is mother teresa a saint "No she aint" SEP when thw pope says mother teresa is a saint.. i say she Ain\'t! SEP i just want to find the optimal bra for sniper operations, but everoyne here is so rude, and pieces of shit SEP some posting music for all of ya SEP mother nature and father time arre not real. theyre fake people who were invented to explain trees and clocks to shitheads SEP every now and then i like to treat myself to a bit of "Lying under oath" SEP fuck ofdf im asleep SEP calling me a weiner now... i shan\'t respond to this. SEP wasnt enough dipshit SEP Barney was actually funny & used fairly adult jokes in the early seasons. After all the teenyboppers latched on; it went to shit. SEP Youre nex\'t. SEP (in worst human voice possible) folks rmember to click that fuckin like & subscribe button and leave a comment below in the fuckin box there SEP washed my hands of him years ago. SEP youwill fucking remove this if you know whats good for you SEP we cant all be burt fucking milford SEP i hope to one day eat 10\'000 calories a day SEP boy\'s Rules:\n1) the only coffee flavored thing should be COFFEE !!\n2) "Shut Da Fuck Up And Keep Ya Head Down"\n3) Never consume Oils SEP i absolutely used a coupon SEP anyway I just bought some ice cube trays and a pot at bb&b. they\'re fine SEP i fuvked up. this app is garbage. sorry SEP yoyu dont choose to be retweeted.. it choose\'s you SEP In culture, today, where they have cellphones, it seems, as, though, the most forgotton words in the English language are, "I give a Damn." SEP AYE... THE OJ SIMPSON VERDICT IS SOMEWHAT SHIT , INNIT!!!!!! SEP MustardCynic: this is not True Spicy Brown... this is Treason Brown SEP ah, its beautiful, SEP i dont know who that is SEP what does that mean. why do people send me messages SEP #HipHopStarWars please. imn begging you. all girls on this hashtag please send HD pictures of your teeth& gums. please god just give me this SEP another miserable day of Disappointing my followers SEP piece of shit SEP i cannot be sure. i can only base my claims on various extrapolations as i do not look at naked fat men in my life. SEP based on a bunch of educated assumptions i\'ve made about weight gain, really obese guys must have like the hugest dicks on the planet SEP I shoudl not be expected to put my knee on the ground to propose to a woman, the same ground where the animals shit, SEP the worst thing you can do in death is make the R.I.P. on your grave actually stand for Racism Is Power SEP boys im here to tellt you that a high-quality wall paper can make any room look fantastic on the cheap SEP Setting aside the dumb ass things of life to focus on the truth of intelligense . SEP dont worry ladies, im not one of those"Bros" who talks to girls about sex stuff. anyway, i have an entire bra stuffed in my mouth right now, SEP leaving splinters stuck in your fingers is good. its all protien baby SEP it depends on the fixture you fucking clod SEP cghecking to see if i have the correct wattage on all of my Light bolbs.. now thats a pizza pie #thatsaPizzaPie SEP liberating to have gotten all the joke\'s out of my system sometime back in 2011 so I can now disseminate serious info to the dumb asses here SEP i can no longer close my eyes. with out seeing a bounty of Farm Fresh groceries being licked by dirty dogs and animals SEP i look very handmsome in my bow tie and suspenders, holding a big red balloon SEP spend a lot of time thinking about how sometimes even war criminals can be heroes sometimes... Dont like it? Click the unfollow buttobn SEP i find the private dm chats are an excellent place to "Workshop" my meltdowns & personal attacks against others, before making them public, SEP i will simply leave u to your circle jerk . SEP pretending not to be mad while the guy in the next stall over takes a big shit while I try to Meditate SEP judgementle people deserve to be put into a special kind of electric chair which sends then to hell even if theyre good . SEP ive started bowing my head and saying grace before reading each post on here... "thank you." "thank you for the posts." that sort of thing, SEP i wish my opinions were good enough to put on bumper stickers, but alas, i can only say "syria is basically road rash 64" using my mouth SEP shooting off automatic rifles making horrible diarrhea shit noises as the recoil makes my tiny dick flop around. hell yeah. thats cool to me SEP never SEP i mailed my detached dick to bolivia to get it enlarged by a professor of Medicine. i am hoping it is returned to me without incident. SEP beer city USA . my friend s SEP its fucked up how there are like 1000 christmas songs but only 1 song aboutr the boys being back in town SEP ive been sititng in buffalo wild wings for 3 hrs now, refusing to speak with the waiter because of his vile dry lips. i will win this battle SEP soaking weekly circulars in my own blood and sending them back to Shop-Rite, to teach them a lesson about enticing my wife with bargains SEP i am a chef now folks. im walking around town in my chefs hat like a real dumbass. everyone hopes i get hit by a car SEP my followers will be thrilled to hear that i am wearing a very pleasant pair of jeans while reading a variety of articles, on subjects SEP UNCLE: on sept 14 u posted "my dick is not all its cracked up to be." Explain yourself please\nME: its. a commentary on the economy actually, SEP i have never condoned "rumpus" SEP blesssed to have over 200 mannequins propped up around my house in vulgar positions, and the accompanying "Love my manny`s" bumper sticker SEP my uncles caught me searching "can i still join isis if im racist" on the family computer & are now withholding all holiday treats for 2015. SEP i would charge u double bitch SEP how do i make it so people have to give me money if they want to reply to my posts SEP becoming incrediblly Spiritual on the computer... holy fuck... SEP yes. this guy is me SEP enya on full blast.. accessing 100 sites per minute SEP if someone dressed in cclown makeup came up to me and asked to suck my dick, id naturally assume it\'s a troll, SEP rooting through some damn womens\' purses. all of the things in these purses suck. i don\'t give a shit SEP #mondaymotivation SEP some dumb asses of life just need a damn "BRAIN " SEP jacking off.. (lights cigarette, takes a big smoke of it) ..i s a Zero Sum fallacy. a jesters game SEP this is based on nothing . entirely fucked SEP if i ge t one more comment about guns being a type of Glove- im spraying the fuse box with a hose until my computer turns off SEP A gun is not clothes just because you can wear a holster with a gun inside of it. Jesus christ. Shut thhe fuck up about guns being clothes. SEP U cant wear a sword. A sword is not clothes. Yes, A SHeathe, is clothes. The sword goes in the sheath, but that doesnt make it clothes bitch SEP thw most valuable icon on any boys desktop... the famed "My Computer" icon. click that bastard and youre good to go SEP erase SEP mnegative 50 points for trying to trick me with runes SEP theres too many of them to block. im gonna lose it SEP all of you people have rat hands. i am going to be fucking sick SEP aguh. lord SEP this is photo shop SEP what is the blue shit i see on them. remove it SEP it sucks SEP i see specks of shit on there SEP i bet you just went ryour entire life growing out that hair on your ring finger, never thinking to remove it, it sucks SEP yoyu appear to be severely ill SEP finger nail check. everyone please post your fingernails right now for my inspection. i will block you if theyre filthy SEP you need to take all of those cans out and wipe the whole damn thing down with a wet cloth SEP thats too much SEP LIKE WANTING TO KNOW WHEN I GET TO SAVE BIG BUCKS FOR PENNYS ON THE DOLLAR AND GET RICH CHEAP SEP for fun SEP never Bitch SEP ignorance... is a fallacy .my dear pals SEP how do you clean a shirt SEP ive never laughged at a piss joke. (sees how impressed everyone is, takes it one step further) in fact, ive never laughed before in my life. SEP (saying loud enough so people can hear) the matrix is the james bond of steam punk SEP Unfunny. SEP (ssees a stock image of a frowning man sitting inside of a doghouse) Hurmph. Asinine. SEP Rats Are Life Facebook SEP this shi t SEP alright ill fix it soon SEP its real SEP sub way is a pedophile... you guys see about this shit ? SEP sears deparftment store used to be the best place to meet up with the boys. nowadays theyll let just about any piece of shit inside to shop. SEP im every james bond SEP torturing my damn dick with corn cob holders in Penance for the foul tone i took with the subway corporation today SEP is really offering a 10% discount to all Muslims who apologize for the attacks... kind of messed up.. SEP wow.. just watching the cnn channel here.. amazed by how they know all the news so well.. Extraordinary SEP please kick my out of control teen\'s ass SEP 2005 me: who the fuck is martin van buren\n2015 me: ah yes. DonkeyKongEddie. arrested at gamestop on nov 13 2014, drives a grey honda accord, SEP after being normal for several months, i am now back to r*cist. SEP sucking on the same big piece of bread for hours and hours ,. SEP i bet half the people posting "Ah!" on here dont even realize its an acronym for "Acknowledged Heartily" SEP Yiou have to be really smart to get 250k followers on here. It doesnt just happen to you if you post false info about your ass for 7 years SEP researching dynamic, groundbreaking new ways to wipe my ass SEP two lives? this is fuckinh barbaric SEP locking this thread. SEP people used to jack off to this guy back in the 90s. not me though SEP its my turds. thank you SEP (rreads a series of Enlightened posts and becomes smart)\nAH. Hm, this is good.\n(reads a troll post and becomes a dumb ass)\nDamn Fuck ! SEP spice up your life by throwing your favorite coffee mug into the garbage SEP adding "A Touch of Class" to my home by wrapping all of my game\'s apparatuse\'s in tinsel SEP i feel truly blessed ,knowing that everyone who has spoken ill of my brand is eating bugs in a cold prison cell. SEP i dont like him. i\'m just looking at him SEP looking at some pictures of dracula, SEP dozens upon dozens of the racist new starbuck cups,. filled with urine and placed all over my computer desk like candles on a satanic altar SEP not many people know this, b ut i actually coined the term "Lunchtime". before then, time and lunch were two entirely immeasurable concepts, SEP album (120 pics) ben stein kissing wife SEP no woman can handle my post s SEP ME: ok now do a search of this. "muppet babies theme - backwards, half speed"\nALFRED HITCHCOCK: Holy Fuck !! SEP the joke\'s hall of fame SEP remove SEP thats it. thats enough. im shutting the computer down ,before i become too powerful SEP theyre not now SEP ive eaten more $14 hamburgers than youve eaten regular hambufrgers, you low engagement galoot SEP is it. i dont know from good anymore SEP dual wielding toilet paper SEP stressed out due to pistachio shit all over my shirt and computer desk . all posts canceled SEP fellas..tell your girls you will n ot be providing any more sex until the entire female race apologizes for halo 5\'s dismal metacritic score SEP ennjoying a big bowl of condoms. twirling them around my fork like spaghetti SEP yeah like im just going to put bottles of my own damn urine up on the mantel. you fucking idiot. this is celeb urine SEP huh.. it;s been awhile since i made an actual joke on here. lets see now. boats are basically uh, skeletons, that people use to, trick water SEP ME: Basiclaly its just a joke we do where whoever says hes El Chapo the most wins\nCOP: Thats not what a joke is\nME: Well its good either way SEP some people sing the praises of the one hundred dollar bill... i myself, prefer the humble, time-tested and reliable one dollar bill SEP hyj SEP llooking extremely normal today SEP U will regret this. SEP yes!!! holy shit! SEP if this shit costs me the Fanta deal i will:\n1) become eeven more racist\n2) cancel all Thursday Nite Rants\n3) add a switchblade to my avatar SEP what do teens find funny nowadays. getting "Slimed" onj nickelodeon? farting principals? help me out here SEP i can guarantee you that im only as racist as the girls im attracted to- and not a tiny bit more SEP I AM NOT RACIST!!! THIS IS AN OUT RAGE!! I DEMAND YOU REMOVE THE POSTS AT ONCE! SEP these people with locked accounts...damn!!! you just know theyre hiding all the good posts in there SEP the times they are indeed a changin..but the one time thatll never change is Lunch time. lock them engagements in if you think this is good. SEP OPRAH: Take us back to the time you invented the famous Livestrong Bracelet.\nME: well..i was at boston market, just looking at my wrist, and SEP boys i need a full report on your Scalp Health by uhh 8pm or else ill go ape shit in the dms, SEP i go outside for the rfirst time in 7 years and a biplane immediately shoots a chemtrail at my dick and makes it 2 inches shorter. typical SEP ah, So u persecute Jared Fogle just because he has different beliefs? Do Tell. (girls get mad at me) Sorry. Im sorry. Im trying to remove it SEP id say my most defining quality is that i instinctively write tremendous amounts of think pieces whenever i see a naked person SEP 4am walgreens haul... re tweet this after the Girls wake up SEP this is true power SEP inspirational... 86 year old man circumcised by doctors in Zaire... "It\'s never too late" "Blessed." SEP i shall not be attending boys night, as i have injured myself while attempting to butterfly an auntie annes pretzel stick . SEP TROLL: Shut down windows\nME: Ah, no SEP this is the final scheule. do not contact me of this. SEP thank you. they gfave it to me all at once like the applebees guy who was in the news recently SEP looking forward to my 19,000 dollars SEP Absolutely Not. SEP for m y money, the best Soda you can get today is at the restaurant we\'ve all come to known as Micky D\'s aka mc donalds. SEP i block all gilrs SEP hell tweet SEP the crusaders fire ballistas into my throbbing diaper- unlesashing a torrent of mustard yellow shit and poisoning the entire village SEP show us the Boys SEP i will not give my location. please do not Track me. It did not meet my expectations. A Disgrace to farm fresh bagels SEP U call this a "Customer First" shopping experience??? I nearly threw UP !! Food floor. No good SEP so many Weird Twitter accts asking me to suck their dick in the dms. im njust like, yeah right bub. you havent even retweeted me since 2013. SEP eat bird shit SEP typical that I should be diarrheaed on for sharing my beleifs SEP got a One Million Dollar idea here. the dewey decimal sytsem... its good right? now imagine using it at Wegmans to find your favorite snacks SEP scores of Farm Fresh, artisan treats available for my perusal.. Oh Me Oh My SEP U want more insight into "THe Process," u say? Look no further. SEP months ago i dreamt about people making their ass cracks longer with surgery. i woke up & immediately put "Crack length" in my drafts folder SEP AAUh..!! Yeah. Lets all gang up on the guy who gives his children Steroids, just because he has a different opinion. Fucking idiots. SEP "Valor is the honor of distinction"... the words engraved on the side of my gun, that i force the gamestop employes to repeat out loud to me SEP i will tell you about the two types of diaper. there\'s the Functional diaper, worn inside the pants. and the Aesthetic diaper, worn outside. SEP bad ass SEP #BenghaziCommittee my dick is normal sized. every morning i use a q-tip dipped in windex to clear scuff marks off of it. i have no illnesses SEP a fuckin.. rat eating a slice of pizza?? damn,. the guy who filmed this must have gbeen smoking weed. SEP fuh..just unfollowed about 900 people on here. Feel as thogugh ive matured a lot in my time on this site & expect a higher grade of content. SEP come. I SHall lead the charge against corrupt Game developers, (Falls face forward ansd a variety of ass medicines spill out of my clothing) SEP HMm, it seems after years of reading my posts, everoyne is still miserable & dumber than shit. Maybe i should post like 100 more times a day SEP cash for Clunkers.. fuck yes to this... SEP im the guy who ruined Columbus Day by saying he had slaves, and im ruining Back to the Future Day too by saying the film is rife with incest SEP concerning "Online", ive found there are websites that are often considered the "Good" websites, and others generally understood to be "Bad" SEP r SEP big meeting with chinese investors coming up in 5 minutes. need to look sharp and presentable. im running my dick under the faucet SEP thiis is not the proper spirit of beer chat SEP in want of a glass of cold one ... SEP wondering why more people aarent faving this screenshot i found of professor Stephen Hawking saying "ape piss". If its fake please tell me SEP didnt know they stack shit , that high SEP what if "DONALD TRUMP" was the ceo of NetFlix? I think itd go a little something like this...! (gestures racistly) What a world What a world SEP And yours. SEP im just a man w ho loves his beavis SEP deray blocked me for no reason. if he wants to challenge me i will absolutely prove im less racist than him. stay out of this SEP sorry, yoyure right. im trying to delete it now but i cant because of a virus. Ah! This is terrible SEP thank you for protecting a grown man from beavis puns SEP i love my beavis. And yours SEP rest assured im constantly surrounded by flies SEP dont make me jump over that fuckinh counter and teach your low wage chefs the difference between "Extra" and "Double" meat ball SEP arbys refuses to honor special bulletin offering a free "Roastbeef Snack" to all divorced men... lots of upset divorced men at this arbys,.. SEP i was so wound up over trolls this morning i forgot to wipe my ass. i pulled my pants up and the shit coalesced into a wad on my lower back. SEP the torture of being a Top Influencer on the hateful, chaotic earth... SEP sorrty. im not a racist. i just thought these slogans were too good not to post SEP coming up with some new racism slogans... "Racism: Never knew it could be this good" "Racism: Gotta geddit" "Racism: Now that\'s what\'s nice" SEP I Hope So SEP forced to remove my famous "DANGER: MAY CONTAIN LETHAL LEVELS OF SARCASM !!" sign from the front door of the poolside shed that i live in SEP Go outside from the computer . SEP , Fuck you !! SEP FURTHER MORe, any future tweet i make may now randomly be designated as a "Hell Tweet", meaning if you reply to it , you will be blocked, SEP 37 souls who will never again be allowed to engage with my red hot brand, bnecause they posted during hell hour and spat in the face of god SEP the hell hour has ended. all 37 repliers to the official hell hour tweet have been blocked indiscriminately. they took the gamble and lost SEP instituting a new feature on my feed called "The Hell Hour". the hell hour begins now SEP the only hthing i hate more than crashing my ford truck is justin biebers dick. which was recently shown to me in pictures SEP I dont appreciate bieng called "The Waterbed Bitch" just because I own a waterbed and post pictures of it daily SEP ready to accept nine hundred dollars into my life SEP taking sips from a big fat thermos with the isis flag on it. thinking about inventing an app that tells me when lunch time is SEP shit and prick my ass SEP i can think of nothing nobler to die for SEP at the advice of my doctor, ive decided to piss, but only in small amounts out of respect for the #NoPiss challenge. i will limit my piss. SEP going strong into hour 8 of #NoPiss. feeling unprecedented spiritual growth. unfollow me if youre upset because this isnt "Funny" or "good". SEP Approaching hour 5 of the #NoPiss challenge. This is very fucking serious and real. Bafflingly, no one has requested to interview me yet SEP i saw the other day- theyre selling it $2 a gallon now. Unbelievable. SEP seems like to me that in this foul economy the only thing "On the Up and Up" is the damn gas prices, thath we all gotta break the bank for . SEP ive completed the first hour of my 2 day #NoPiss challenge. i am searching for media outlets who would like to document my struggle SEP im still allowed to jack off. jacking off does not count as pissing. please let me have this SEP ive decided to abstain from urination for two days, to punish myself for letting my kolut score dip below 70 again SEP (in the \'lets get ready to rumble\' man\'s voice) lllllleeets get ready to post some good shit SEP (ddumb ass, squinting at the tv, struggling to comprehend "The Flintstones") why are they wearing those outfits SEP i only fav tweets that exhilarate the mind and soul, groundbreaking content which challenges the established status quo SEP " A fucking bastard lives here " SEP oh theyre up SEP i warnned you all that bad things would happen if you kept letting your wives wear jeans. AND NOW LOOK! the damn gas prices are up again SEP Fairly, yes, actually. SEP RE: Restaurant Etiquette >> I\'ve been a waiter for 9 years, and I like it when people snap their fingers at me. So your commant is invalid. SEP Agreed, actually SEP (smoking cig on stage) Ya know, like i always say, these fuckers dont know a damn thing of common sense. COupons are like free money. Use em SEP these guys tried to run a hospital in AFGHANISTAN?? hello?? i dont know if you noticed, but theres a war there? U gotta use your heads folks SEP oh, youvve read a few academic papers on the matter? cute. i have read over 100000 posts. SEP stop tlaking to me. youre diminishing my Art SEP thanks SEP (intentionally spoken within earshot of severral arbys girls) ah fuck. my hands smell like steroids from using steroids all day SEP dead certainly., if my pit bulls could speak... they would say "please, please increase my power" SEP i sincerely hope all of you remembered to powder your keyboards and mice to prevent Hand damage during your normal 16 hr browsing sessions SEP if u think its fucked up that men & women are allowed to eat the same kinds of food, type the word "yes" into your browser bar & click on it SEP Antonio Vivaldi six violin concertos, strings & continuo in A major " Burger King Theme " Op. 2 N°11 published in Venice by Bortoli - 1708 SEP hwow many favs are worth the equivalent of a human life... id say about 70 SEP wgat SEP log me in to the on-line city where the links are blue and the girls Dm Me...... SEP This woman is an FBI agent sent to jingle her keys through the library to intimidate me about jail. SEP The entire King Soopers store at 80th & Wadsworth is staffed with Federal Agents not authorized by any judge, SEP FOOL: Foot & mouth disease isnt necessarily good\nME: Ive had it with this shit. Im showing this to your employer\nFOOL: Dont. I have a family SEP do not interfere with my negotiations please SEP please do a wiki leak addressing the mistreatment of gamer`s by viacom SEP Give mme my fucking coupons you cock sucking rats. I deserve at least 4 coupons for posting kindly of your nauseating animal fodder SEP i think when we get caught up in our gadgets and email, we forget to sit down and appreciate that time-tested classic doritos SEP please show me pins i can wear that will make me look very handsome in churdh SEP my romantic girl friend sees the super blood moon reflected in my greased back hair and pledges then and there to bow to christ our master SEP dont do it. 1million followers is more powerful than the nuke #NoMillion SEP pissed off because people are watching their precious football instead of asking me why im pissed off SEP Duur!! Thanks for clown baiting me. Idiot SEP ME: (pulls soaked pair of jnco jeans out of sons aquarium) Ah wahts this. You cant continue to live here if you do this\nSON: Im a smoker now SEP looking how to become more cyber SEP I find my self. walking the hallowed halls of Harverd university , thinking wisely to my self. upon the quest, for Knowledge... SEP (truyng to stumble across the next big two-word phrase that gets really popular for no reason) udhhu.. bird hell owl. big hell. owl hell SEP Waiiter, i have not received my Farm Fresh olives, and my steak is far too Unctuous. Please tell the chef to go back to 9 gag. SEP SCreaming while the road workers slowly pave a road on top of me using my own tax dollar SEP i have never in my life- shit my pants or had an erection. it is ludicrous to claim other wise SEP in the midst of jade helm 15 and high gas prices. a good boy looks to the stars and asks where have all the angels Gone ............... SEP normal hamburger with that doritos flair SEP droitos should make hamburgers SEP NEWSWEEK: WHat can be said. youre a spectacular brand. like hitler without the racism\nME: I am exactly indeed like hitler without the racism SEP Thheres just not enough moisture in food now a days. Run that shit under the faucet SEP get more than 3 friends. you stooge SEP folks, please. this is a private matter between me and the heartless criminal SEP youve once again broken the sacred confidentiality of the text message. i\'ve nothing to say to u. SEP someone on here asked me my opinion of Worcestershire sauce... but i dont feel ready to share that at this time. SEP Ready to enjoy my Farm Fresh Mozzarella Sticks from Bertuccis, retweet my favorite celebs, and post some worms-eye pics of my Genitals & Ass SEP folks the only thing higher than Cheetch & Chong—is gas prices\n(audience goes wild, hooting,screaming; starting Great Gas Price Riot of \'15) SEP as a real life professional Chef , i refuse to buy any packaged food that isn\'t marked with the words "Limited Edition" SEP apparently pharmacies think theyre grocery shops now. selling food product instead of focusing on exceptional pill service. Get real, punk ! SEP i know i will catch endless flak for this. but I am of the belief, that the tried and true Suit and Tie, is a Classic SEP BRIDE OF DECEIT SEP I TAKE BACK EVERY KIND THING I\'VE SAID ABOUT THE GIRLS ON HERE ! SHALLOW AND CRUEL ! HEART LESS DEVILS ! MANIPULATING MY POSTS & TRICKING ME SEP im methodical bitch. your the random guy SEP FOOL: Love to get a bee in my bonnet\nME: theres no possible way you could love that. take this down immediately\nFOOL: Ah, foiled again SEP don\'t reply to this. i already know it\'s a good joke SEP im the guy who originally cooked up the "garden of eatin" joke. thats my bit. im just saying it out in the open here & now. trolls be damned SEP just noticed the new washcloths ive been showering with have the FoodNetwork logo. this is my biggest failure to date SEP once again natalie, your repulsive attitude towards online authority figures has caused me to SHIT myself in terror SEP to me, the white and yellow lines that get painted to the roads are mostly a nuisance. i say let\'s #TakeEmOff SEP announcin,g in 2016 my new brand alliance with cool arab man SEP Jack Ass: Arguably, in many ways, a "Two-fer" could conceivably be worse than a "One-fer"\nME: I\'d will not even dignify that with a response SEP 2 celeb headlines i came up with, in case one of them does something: "Hasta Travolta, Baby" "Bieber does it again. Ah, but thats hollywood" SEP i cried during the schene where richie rich revealed the mcdonalds in his house. if you dont like it, move on SEP CHEF: mon signor!! leaving the tails on the shrimp is good! it is tre bien\nME: Im going to nuke you with live ammo. Im the guy from the crow SEP i pay good money to load my sons bag with treats, and if Erasmus Infowars Copfucker wants to devour them in the university library, so be it SEP here u go virdgens. 831B-0000-001E-7606 SEP half wit bumpkin here, looking for new snacks SEP startling how im the only person on this site with an actual human soul. you would think the other guys on here have one, but no SEP ME: was thinkin about how I could incorporate the phrase "obama breeze" into my next post. Thoughts?\nTOM CRUISE: its solid gold baby. Killer SEP funny how ppeople get faved for posting "Humour", but when i post about how deeply in love i am with the girls here i get the old Brush off SEP ME: ill take.. one Cruisp bird w/ extra bird sauce please\nKFC CLERK: Huh?\nME: (gives him the Wink of Irony)\nKFC CLERK: Ah! The Wink of Irony SEP imbecile goes viral after telling tgifridays waiter that his caesar dressing is "too spicy" SEP Shut the fuck up? Now ? Whil;e im smack in the middle of perhaps my most ruthless tear against Netflix Culture? Muwahaha. Never SEP mE: i\'ll take eggland\'s WORST, please\ngrocery clerk (min wage): Good joke sir SEP i shall say this only; ive ended peoples careers by reporting them for "Ironic" typos & spelling errors., i do not give a shit. im a warrior SEP i fuucking love being sent to Juvie Hall SEP Houly fuck.. They did it. They replaced all the HF corn syrup w/ pure cane sugar. My minds absolutly blown by this shitty drink for children SEP mr bean is a complete dope. his oddball capers are crass and unrealistic. i frown while watching this show. SEP theres never been a horny me,\n and never shall i horny be,\nAnd If this sacred vow shall break,\n I pray the lord my posts to take SEP fingers ranked by how good it is to show them to people:\n1. thumb\n2. pinky\n3. ring\n4. index\n5. middle\n\nsteal this listicle,u corrupted fucks SEP my tweets are good way less often than 20%. damn, with a 20% success rate i\'d have my own hbo special by now SEP extremmely turned on by Fav Denial , heavily worked up by women declining to fav my posts SEP please let me cover my entire webpage in jungle camo so soldiers can research vital murder info on the battlefield without being spotted SEP I hate bodys SEP Announcing new feature called #Rubadubdub where my followers are encourgaged to post pics of themself inside the bathtub. Ban me i dont care SEP LIAR: Free data plan. is absolutely not good. It\'s something I don\'t think we should want\nME: Im not to touch this one with a 10 foot pole SEP STREET TOUGH: HEY. VERIFIED ACCTS ARENT FAVING U ANYMORE. WHATS THE DEAL\nME:(pretending not to hear, fumbling w/ keys to open my shitty car) SEP Nuffs aid. Need I say more? Nuff said. Need I say more? Nuff said. Need i say more? Nuff said. Need I say more? Nuff said. Need I say SEP fav if you think adults should have access to toilet time\nretweet to see the face of G-OD\nignore and get th e word "Liar" branded into flesh SEP 15 years ago the most shocking thing online was a picture of a man spreading his ass cheeks open. today, it\'s my opinions about Wet shaving SEP Ah, thats a Blocked. SEP should i do this?? boys? SEP Gah . Delete it SEP Lets see u do better. SEP Im going to make 1000 videos of fuck nasa. SEP i rise; spreading my arms, exuding fluorescent spheres of energy, each representing an Unfollower, Cuasing me a great deal of pain,Screaming SEP (vomits while dioing pushups at the gym and resists every attempt from professional trainers to stop me from continuing) SEP the inventor of the famous "Love to Scrimp, Hate to Save" tweet... FINALLy taking pop culture to task... "You gotta see it to believe it" SEP Love To Scrimp, Hate To Save #TheFinalWordOfIt SEP if you want the real bargains during boys night out... gotta go with the Children\'s menu... every time SEP Im sorry? Are u "Going in" on me?? Am I being "Gone In" upon just for p osting my time-tested opinions about girls holding forks incorrectly SEP No sex on this profile SEP i believe that jade healm 15, and the markets going haywire, youve got a "Witch\'s Brew" of bull shit SEP The three brnaches of government? Simple. Breakfast, Lunch, and DInner. Because the government loves eating us alive with the old Tax & Spen SEP each \'Ridge\' in your crinkle-cut potato chip costs 4 gallons of precious slave blood to create and adds a satisfying "Cruntch" to every bite SEP im a bush-league yokel who should be put on the floor SEP bramds SEP the most popular of my weekly features is returning in 2016. thats roight folks. #WaterboyWednesday no further info at this time. SEP Once again, those dastardly, Devious trolls have installed a device underneath my computer desk that shoots me in the dick every time i post SEP Ah!! Ah! once again, the flap-jawed trolls have deliberately misinterpreted my constant attempts to get a girl friend on here as " Sexual " SEP released statement regarding Grumpy Cat urinary tract infection: "Grumpy Cat is in a lot of pain, but still wants to entertain you at shows" SEP front of my shirt: " YES: MY PATIO IS HAND-WASHED "\nback of my shirt: a convenient bullseye so people can shoot me if they want to SEP bush was the president who likes oil. correct? so what i think is that its actually "Castor oil", because he leaves a bad taste in my mout!! SEP feeling devilishly Racist today... might apply just a smidgen of Blackface before i go out chasing cars SEP im sorry everyone. i should not have commented on the ribs. i never could have known this would happen SEP i respectfully will not SEP Childish. i dont have time for links SEP ill simply let the fav counts do the talking. as i normally do when dealing with cra[p. SEP u cant bruise a rib. only the skin around it #Annihilated SEP am I the most dark & twisted psycho god online?? hm lets see:\n- When the dow jones industrial average goes down i say simply the word "Good" SEP windows..on behalf of all boys online, INCLUDING the trolls, id like to extend a well-deserve "Thank You" for putting updates in my computer SEP i have every net flick SEP UNITED NATIONS: ah!! please help us! we need just a normal man\'s opinion!! we got you a seat\nME: How\'m I to trust you, while God is bleeding SEP hm.. the essentials... well what can i say. you gotta have em baby SEP tormenting lab animals with my huge vibrating ass SEP If you do this: Fuck you SEP i hear in some cultures they crap in their hand first before putting it in the toilet. thats fucked up to me. just shit it directly in there SEP survey - please tell me which one is "Most good":\n>Perfect meadows in every direction\n>A Man wheezing into the toilet\n>Bobs BigBoy PattyMelt SEP Priest: and the lord said, take this delicious McDonald and eat it, for it is my body and it will be given up, for you\nMe: Insanley badass. SEP LawAndOrderGal has entered JeansChat\nLEVIS_GAURDIAN: NEED A FUCKING DRAINAGE RIG THAT WONT SCALD MY THIGHS\nLawAndOrderGal has left JeansChat SEP (pitching the Michelin Man) hes this big white dipshit and people associate him with tires for some reason. he has no personality. no jokes SEP the maligned Villains of my story., my ass and dick, are known to drive my readers the most wild and turbochagrge engagements & impressions SEP founnd a cicada skin stuck to my nefarious pud SEP i can only hope that when a kangaroo court of dipshits comes to haul me to prison that i have the grace and humility not to get mad at them SEP the infamous millennials are more interested in (consults notepad) being nickeled and dimed by the tax man than (squints) distilling vinegar SEP i know im a dumb ass for expecting a serious response from the chucklefuck brigade, but can someone please tell me if im circumcised or not SEP im sorry to Wawa for attempting to behead myself in one of their restrooms. i promise to take the Wawa experience more seriously from now on SEP no.that\'s a cruel myth SEP SUCJK MY DICK SEP "don\'t tread of me", the famous words of that good snake who doesn\'t want to get stepped on, the noble slithering bastard I relate to most SEP alrigt jack asses. before you "Go In" on me, heres a quick recap of the jokes i invented:\n- Dogs (Anything mentioning them)\n- The Weed Fairy SEP mods!! mods! one of those obscene low follower count boys stole a lick from the delicious lolly that Father bought me!! ah! how dreadful ! SEP now you see, what i like to do is consider my page to be a "No Frown Zone", because of the consistently good quality of my messages i put up SEP #TenThingsNotToSayToAWriter im going to piss all over your car. for being a Writer. SEP its disgusting to create the illusion on tv that animals are talking with cgi or otherwise. a disgraceful tactic SEP suigh... this weeks Bone Head award goes, once again, to my ex-wife, who just bought a stupid ass looking refrigerator SEP thank you. this is the kindest thing a girl ever did for me. feeling blessed SEP what is the best kind of acid to spray my own dick with as a joke SEP my portfolio SEP Does anyone know how important is this. SEP well i cant follow yiou now that you\'ve asked for it. then everyone will be asking for the damn follow, and i cant handle that SEP i followed you after you promised to wear the diaper to work if you reached 5000 followers. i needed it to happen SEP thank you all. your kind donations of $400000 will keep me alive for 1 more month, after being fired for looking at racist swords on my ipad SEP evvery other Friday the sheriff guides me around the jailhouse and lets me expose myself to the villains, and thats #MyTGIF SEP i forgot him SEP Bugs Bunny: B\nElmer Fudd: A-\nTweety Bird: F\nDaffy Duck: C+\nPorky Pig: D+\nTheyre the only ones i can think of right now. My hands are shaking SEP sponsors are telling me not to post them. but idont give a fuck. im sick of being pushed around. this is my account & thats the bottom word SEP im assigning a letter grade to all the looney tunes at 10:00PM EST sharp. this is a once in a lifetime event. please do not miss it SEP my repulsive cohorts and I are searching the woods for tree sap so we can rub it all over our hands and improve our golf grip SEP Fool!! Bastard! SEP "Crowdpleasers"... Now these, I like SEP just indignantly threw $799 gamer keyboard into koi pond because i got pissed off by the craze that is sweeping the nation known as Planking SEP the adrenaline rush i get from posting gives me the energy to walk to the toilet, and the endorphins i get from shitting allow me to post SEP Goodboy goodboy SEP erased by government SEP w*akes up on the morning of july 18th 2015 sick and tired of Snooki and HoneyBooBoo* Wheres my damn nuke bomb... SEP Whos that SEP doesnt matter whose mouth they find them in. we\'ll all be dead. who cares SEP archaeologists 1000yrs from now are going to find my embalmed turds and assume they were part of some sacred ritual. NOpe im just a dumb ass SEP trolls: Lets jerk off to the teletubbies and. barney\nme (to followers): Are u seeing this. Are you seeing thi s. Am i the only sane man left SEP does anyone have any tips and tricks for someone about to own a Balcony. Can i take beer on it SEP because its good to SEP i have taken my shirt off over 10000 times SEP on one hand $2000 will barely even cover the cost of my large amount of mansions. on the other hand i respect the wild flava brand immensely SEP sell my account to "Wild Flava" () for $2000? this is perhaps the most difficult decision i;ll ever face . SEP wow this 40lb bag of dog food is only $30... why do dogs get all the bargains SEP i iwsh he blocked me so i could talk shit about him, but now i have to say the gofundme is good and im glad hes doing it. SEP you deserve my worst offer, which is "2" SEP my q uote of the season "Its almost summer time so lets hop in the pool" SEP scarce, low quality content and an abundance of wrong opinions is the reason the cavemen went extinct. thats my beliefs bitch SEP honey mustard likers... heres a one million dollar idea for you "honey ketchup" SEP (sees no soliciting sign outside Wendy\'s) damn it!!! fuck! i really wanted to solicit to wendys!! SEP just remember what it is we\'re all fighting fo.r... SEP When you "FAve" me, you are effectively throwing a " Treat " into my mouth SEP "Gotcha" SEP They both stink SEP CLICK ON MY POST 10000 TIMES IF YOU ARE WORKED UP OVER COMPUTERS SEP i show up at the range wearing a t-shirt that says "I Wont Wear The Earplugs" and i m promptly directed back to my car by staff members SEP *ffires 400 rounds at a piece of shit log until it slumps over* Take that adam landza SEP ME: hey ed. whats good to shoot at the range today\nED: Someone threw a big bag of packing peanuts out there. Its good to hit it with bullets SEP always take my stagecoach full of pit bulls to the Range . because my girls love to watch me shoot SEP iwant to be pummeled with carpet beaters by eastern european grandmas and make big awful clouds of dust SEP please teach me how to make a net so that i can nab the ruthless scoundrel known as el chapo SEP Perhaps consider making that option available in the future for those of us who don\'t eat out of the dumspter. SEP well if it was allowed, id go with a banana thats the average amount of ripe, as i believe it offers the "Best of both worlds" SEP THis is not a "Meltdown". Its a normal opinion SEP THe Eagles is a team of football who i respect & admire. Their commitment to touchdowns is good. They are athletic when it comes to sports SEP bark up the wrong damn tree ass whiper SEP my page is a tornado of Slur\'s...\n my inbox is a viper pit of horseplay...\n my desktop is a Clown\'s Tent for bastards... SEP every woman ivr ever spoken to would describe our correspondence as "Graceful" SEP my followeres, who all hate me, and wish to kick my ass, are nobodys, and they lack the combat training to injure me, because theyre infants SEP well, he blocked me now, so i cant SEP HHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH SEP i dont know hwho that is SEP (bowed head solemnly rises from deep thought) Intellidgence is the strength of wisdom SEP why\'d there suffering in this world................. SEP second result for "playing violin" SEP "flouride 666" SEP please everyone search for shit like "autism microchip" on youtube and look at all the thumbnails on their videos SEP if you like the band "Shinedown" you will love this video of me getting trounced by police officers while demanding to meet them SEP #FreeSlurpeeDay they dont ever wash the slurpe machines. the cops found a shitty waynes world baseball cap inside one of them SEP Frowning Principal Exposed To Beer Content On Time Line SEP im the dip shit top replier who goes into every thread about someone being afraid of moving out and says "Dont forget to buy a plundger"